I was given advice.

By a good friend, someone who i do trust a lot. I've had a hard time getting over my last girlfriend. She suggests dating someone, for the sake of doing so. My original intent with my ex was that. I just get to emotionally in my relationships.

That was two weeks ago. The more i think about it, the better an offer it sounds to take up, even though i know how it will end...

Don't do it.

You can't solve relationship problems (even ended ones) with new relationships.

That would be unfair to the new person you're dating.

NO ONE WANTS TO BE THE REBOUND GUY/CHICK.

Example ---> Me

I'm f***ing screwed up (emotionally...mentally) as I'm constantly the second choice and doing that is hurtful.

Do not be with someone "for the sake of doing so".

Suppose they take a sincere interest in you...and obviously, you're already emotionally invested in your ex...you would only end up hurting them because you only wanted to use them for YOUR own gain.

Recover on your own, and then perhaps you can love again.

Last thing you need to do is to screw over a potentially good person and hurt them...
They could be with someone who could appreciate them fully for what they can offer...
Be the better person, as difficult as it may be...
It is a sign of true character and strength...

Luna's said it all, and I agree with her every word...

I don't think you should start actively trying to find another girl just to get over your ex.

Why don't you just get out and about more? Take up a hobby, do more things, meet new people. Get out of your same routine.

Then if you happen to meet a girl through that, who you take a fancy to, then sure - go out with her. But don't do it to get over someone else - do it because you like her and want to...

kelbo said:

I don't think you should start actively trying to find another girl just to get over your ex.

Why don't you just get out and about more? Take up a hobby, do more things, meet new people. Get out of your same routine.

Then if you happen to meet a girl through that, who you take a fancy to, then sure - go out with her. But don't do it to get over someone else - do it because you like her and want to...

Click to expand...

I get out often. My friend amber has had a crush on me for months, and she wants me to date her. I have been single for about 2 months now.

Ursus Veritas said:

kelbo said:

I don't think you should start actively trying to find another girl just to get over your ex.

Why don't you just get out and about more? Take up a hobby, do more things, meet new people. Get out of your same routine.

Then if you happen to meet a girl through that, who you take a fancy to, then sure - go out with her. But don't do it to get over someone else - do it because you like her and want to...

Click to expand...

I get out often. My friend amber has had a crush on me for months, and she wants me to date her. I have been single for about 2 months now.

Click to expand...

Well, normally, I'd say go for it. However, knowing your background, you seem to just want to date just to get over a failed relationship. And it doesn't work like that. Not only will you still have those hurt feelings and unsolved issues from the last relationship, you'll now have a whole new relationship to tend to. And on top of that, this new girlfriend will, unfortunately, be the rebound. And that won't make her feel very good either.

Getting over an ex takes time. No one else can "fix" that. And certainly not a quick fix at that.

ultimately you're going to have to move forward...in other words date again.
If you feel or think you need the time to sort things out...then by all means do so.
It's not really necessary though...everything is an option in life.
Life is not without pains...suffering is optional.

When you get to the piont of moving forward...it's always going to be in the NOW...
Wheather it's a week from this moment or a year. You're either going to let go or get over it
in the moment of the NOW...and move forward in the NOW.

When your heart was broken..it too happened in the NOW and in a split moment.
You just play the same old image of hurt over and over again in the NOW in your head, which generated more
feelings of hurt in the NOW.

When you chose to let go or stop playing those feelings of rejections, hurt, anger...it too will be in the NOW.
When a new woman come into your life...She too will appear to you in the NOW.

There's no future...a future is just a protection in your mind of the many what if's in the NOW
The past are just memories your mind replays in the NOW.

We are always living in the NOW. That's all we're ever going to have.
Every awaken moments, every thoughts, feelings, actions we take...happens in the NOW.

When we live in the NOW...and not in our heads. It's actaully peaceful without pains.
Our thouths drives our emotions....emotional pains are in our heads or minds.
Emotional attachement...mmmm that would be in our minds too.

mmmm...it's not so much about getting over your gf or letting go of your GF...It's more about you.
It's about you chosing to let go of you thoughts and getting over your feelings.
Your ex and no one else feels your feelings or have your thoughts...this is FACTS and REALITY.
KNOW THYSELF...educate yourself on how your brain, mind and body functions.

Get in touch with your emotions...feel them , experince them, process them..wheather it be pains, anger, fears, happiness, joy..etc.
Expand on your emotional volcabuary. You are not your emotions. You have emotions.
You are not your thoughts. You have thoughts. You don't have to react to your emotions. You have a chioce.

Thoughts> emotions> actions/reactions.
Actions> habits> charector/triats.


Control you mind or it will control you. Worst...other people will control you.
You''ll get pawned or become someone's else pond.
Learn how to trust in yourself. Trust in your own intuitions.
Everyone else is just another human being just like you...KNOW THIS.
In other words...they don't have all the answers . More important..they don't have answers to your life period.
In other words...learn how to take your own advice and think for yourself. Make decision for yourself.
It's a very, very big part of loving yourself and having good self esteem, self worth, self confidence.
Notice ????....it's SELF esteem, SELF confidence..not other people's confidence or worth.

In other words...whaT IS IT THAT YOU WANT?
Do you want a serious relationship?
Do you want to just get over the pains?
Do you want to just get laid?

Just sit down and ask yourself these simple questions and answer them honestly to yourself.
If you just wanna get laid and know that you're on a rebound..then by means do it. That would be the correct answer for you. If that is what you want and need to do.
It's a whole hell a lot better than sitting at home staring at the 4 walls and continplating suiecide.

if you just wanna get laid...then go out and get laid. Have sex with lots of women. You'll know not all women are the same.
Maybe you feel you need to get it out of your system...play the field before you settle down or that you don't feel like you missed out on dating or having sex with lots of women.

if you feel you need time to regroup, Then by all means..take time to regroup.

The love of your life can simply walk across your path NOW...but you're too bussied thinking, holding on to your thoughts and emotions

If you want to get over your ex...you can do it NOW..becuase that when you're going to do it. You will make that decision in the NOW.
When you change your life...It will happen NOW..becuase that's when you're going to do it.