• Please register and login and join us. Registered members may block ads while they are logged in.

A message for members who are new and/or don’t have any online friends…

AnonymousMe

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 6, 2013
Messages
368
Reaction score
9
Hey everyone. So, there’s something that’s been bugging me about this site and I just feel like this is something I need to say. I’ve seen, and I’m still seeing, lots of threads about users looking for friends to chat with. I don’t know how you all did in your request, if you all found someone, then that’s awesome, but I’m pretty sure many of you haven’t yet, hence why I’m writing this.

I understand it’s easier to ask someone to approach you, I did the same thing when I signed in here and it’s still a little bit intimidating to privately message someone. Not to mention, it’s a gamble as to whether or not you’ll get along with someone you contact. So, I want to be a little bit of a reliever for many of you, if you’re still out of luck and/or don’t participate much in any public forum, contact me.

I don’t know everything about the world, but I can certainly try in learning to chat about new stuff. In regards to me however, I consider myself an open book, at least, when it comes to chatting (it’s the opposite in the real world, where I’m too shut-in), so don’t be afraid to talk to me about ANYTHING. It doesn’t matter if it’s something you do everyday or a secret you’re willing to take to the grave, I won’t criticize you for it, except if it’s fraudulent or violent behavior; those two are my limit.

Let me give you all a little introduction about myself. My real name is Raul; 31.4-years-old; Heteroflexible and I still have my V-card; polyamorous; am diagnosed with Lv. 1 autism; my self-esteem is in the gutter; jobless, but I am studying graphic design; I don’t want to be chubby anymore, so I’m lifting weights; officially Catholic, but consider myself a Deist; politically centered, independent or moderate; I like anything animated (western or eastern [manga counts too], it doesn’t matter) more so than live-action series; I like single-player video games, especially indie titles; I like to browse the internet A LOT, but avoid social media like a plague. I instead read about history, mythology and religion, because I’m hoping to publish a book one day; I don’t like social norms, freaking hate them actually; I like soundtrack and metal music, especially the latter; I like guns; I like dogs; I like solo and/or animated porn; I don’t like sports; I don’t like parties; I don’t drink or smoke; I am a picky-eater. And… that’s it.

Feel free to contact me if I sound like someone you all can chat with; I don’t care if my inbox gets bombarded and will try to reply to everyone.
 

Diagnosed

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
464
Reaction score
3
Location
Hopeland
but avoid social media like a plague.
Thanks for all good things U said!
In my case, interacting within the virtual ONLINE loneliness I have search who I am, my fears and the type of loneliness I have caused those I said I loved or would have loved.

There´s a point of NOT turning back, except being YOU, the real you, nobody would deny, hurt or scam.

If they accept WHO you are, are least, they gave you the chance to being liked the way you are.

If YOU have liked any of them, you yourselves risk to expose and undergo any pain or risk of meetin ppl the arena they are: To grow up.

We´re not any better than THEY also are!
 

nerdgrl

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
24
Reaction score
18
I'm here commenting because no one seems to mind my comments or think I'm quite strange. Nice change for me. 🙃 It used to bother me, either having no friends, or more often now that I have friends who mysteriously ghost me 🤷🏼‍♀️ This has happened so often in roughly the past five years -- I just stopped caring about it and learned to value my own company more than relying on others for companionship. In person, I rarely talk unless necessary. 😆 Like others here, I'm also an Aspie/Level 1 Autistic -- to me it's a gift and I make good use of it. 😏 When I feel lonely, it's because there are no active topics, and I just like to add to conversations. I don’t usually connect with most people anymore, as it is no longer possible for me to do so. And that's ok with me. 🙃
 

Diagnosed

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
464
Reaction score
3
Location
Hopeland
I'm here commenting because no one seems to mind my comments or think I'm quite strange. Nice change for me. 🙃 It used to bother me, either having no friends, or more often now that I have friends who mysteriously ghost me 🤷🏼‍♀️ This has happened so often in roughly the past five years -- I just stopped caring about it and learned to value my own company more than relying on others for companionship. In person, I rarely talk unless necessary. 😆 Like others here, I'm also an Aspie/Level 1 Autistic -- to me it's a gift and I make good use of it. 😏 When I feel lonely, it's because there are no active topics, and I just like to add to conversations. I don’t usually connect with most people anymore, as it is no longer possible for me to do so. And that's ok with me. 🙃
When I was younger I used to have a fantasy the woman I would have loved needed to have a keyboard next to my own, so we used to talk the way and in the secrecy we liked...

Today, when I visited Twitter, I think I left an Ex the words she wrote in my notebooks (she was a writers) telling me she valued a WRITTEN word MORE than a spoken one.
She wrote it in Sept 2007! And I found the chats we used to enjoy...
 

nerdgrl

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
24
Reaction score
18
When I was younger I used to have a fantasy the woman I would have loved needed to have a keyboard next to my own, so we used to talk the way and in the secrecy we liked...

Today, when I visited Twitter, I think I left an Ex the words she wrote in my notebooks (she was a writers) telling me she valued a WRITTEN word MORE than a spoken one.
She wrote it in Sept 2007! And I found the chats we used to enjoy...
Did you feel happy to find the old chats? I'm not on Twitter (not a fan of social media), so I'm not sure if your experience was a happy or sad one -- or just nostalgic. 🙃 Thank you for sharing, though.

Sometimes I find old chats or letters, and I wonder how old friends are. Other times I read them and I'm thankful those people are no longer in my life. And, a few dear friends have died in recent years, and I still miss them terribly. One of my best/closest friends ever, I was not ready for him to die. I still have his emails and our chats, I saved them.
 

Diagnosed

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
464
Reaction score
3
Location
Hopeland
Happy? That´s might be somewhat rethoric, did it?

That think I like (more) it´s I read others things I tried to keep as a diary.
I´ve found myself the way I think I am + with those things I have forgotten, hidden, etc. So I see I belong to many things I don´t give up and own.

As a sad experience, I reread a love issue I have forgotten. But I gave more light on the things I MISSED (as prayers that were answered without I was aware) and the things I expected to be loved, the way I planned I would be loved...

It´s good to keep some emotional luggage to know where I would go back.
 

Diagnosed

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
464
Reaction score
3
Location
Hopeland
Since you mentioned death... Yes!
The 1st page I realized one friend was on his birthday (Sept 30) and I came to visit his shop...
He just died last month with covid!

Those memories I wrote reconnected me with those things I have forgotten as life lessons.
 

nerdgrl

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
24
Reaction score
18
Happy? That´s might be somewhat rethoric, did it?

That think I like (more) it´s I read others things I tried to keep as a diary.
I´ve found myself the way I think I am + with those things I have forgotten, hidden, etc. So I see I belong to many things I don´t give up and own.

As a sad experience, I reread a love issue I have forgotten. But I gave more light on the things I MISSED (as prayers that were answered without I was aware) and the things I expected to be loved, the way I planned I would be loved...

It´s good to keep some emotional luggage to know where I would go back.

I said "happy" only because I didn't understand your emotions. So I chose happy and sad, it seemed simplest. I don't associate "happy" with people because people like to give me emotional stress and trauma -- too much work. I am happy around animals, natural places, and when alone in the Universe.

Emotional luggage, I lock the door when possible, and walk away. Don't need more of that in my life. Spent years getting rid of what other people gave me. I think people should stop handing down their emotional wreckage as family heirlooms -- it's *not* a nice tradition!
 

Diagnosed

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
464
Reaction score
3
Location
Hopeland
Ja! Ja! Ja!

I have heard of asexual ppl. Yet not often related to unemotionals.
Words are proned to be guessed different ways!
 

nerdgrl

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
24
Reaction score
18
Since you mentioned death... Yes!
The 1st page I realized one friend was on his birthday (Sept 30) and I came to visit his shop...
He just died last month with covid!

Those memories I wrote reconnected me with those things I have forgotten as life lessons.

I write a lot. Including life lessons. But I have found, for myself, that once I've learned a life lesson, it is part of me and my life moves on after that. Problems tend to recur in our lives until we learn a certain lesson, then we move on once we've learned it. The obstacles are about the learning, the lesson has to become a part of us -- or someone else ..... sometimes we *are* the lesson for others, and vice versa.

Death .... not afraid of it. It saddens me, being separated from a few people I love so much. But they're not gone, I believe they are pure energy now, part of the life force. They're still around, just their physical form is gone, and their consciousness has moved on. Just what i believe.
 
Last edited:

nerdgrl

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2019
Messages
24
Reaction score
18
Ja! Ja! Ja!

I have heard of asexual ppl. Yet not often related to unemotionals.
Words are proned to be guessed different ways!
Asexual is *not* the same thing as unemotional. There is a big difference.
 
Last edited:

Diagnosed

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
464
Reaction score
3
Location
Hopeland
I keep a private journal, I write a lot. Including life lessons. But I have found, for myself, that once I've learned a life lesson, it is part of me and my life moves on after that. Problems tend to recur in our lives until we learn a certain lesson, then we move on once we've learned it. The obstacles are about the learning, the lesson has to become a part of us -- or someone else ..... sometimes we *are* the lesson for others, and vice versa.

Death .... not afraid of it. It saddens me, being separated from a few people I love so much. But they're not gone, I believe they are pure energy now, part of the life force. They're still around, just their physical form is gone, and their consciousness has moved on. Just what i believe.
Prehaps!
Nowadays I don´t feel such longings. In fact, I´m aware I´m not alone on this loneliness I´ve created. Yet I´m not neardy enough to get this all.

I have burnt too many notebooks, but I have the hunch I will keep just few along within my HDDs. and, no need to a "private" journal.
I´m not afraid to be me, to be exposed, yet less self-centered: Which is nice to breathe fresh airs!
 
Last edited:

Diagnosed

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 13, 2019
Messages
464
Reaction score
3
Location
Hopeland
Yes, asexuals, or aces. That's me also. Part of the LGBTQA+ community. We do exist.
The moment they said: "I´m a pervert for liking ppl younger than me" I´m not sure I would sign their books, since my beliefs do not belong to pansexuals or those they said they are.
 

AaronAgassi

Member
Joined
Aug 11, 2018
Messages
15
Reaction score
1
Death .... not afraid of it. It saddens me, being separated from a few people I love so much. But they're not gone, I believe they are pure energy now, part of the life force. They're still around, just their physical form is gone, and their consciousness has moved on. Just what i believe.
Nerdgrl, as to confronting death, of possible interest: http://www.FoolQuest.com/kriosgrad.htm
 

AaronAgassi

Member
Joined
Aug 11, 2018
Messages
15
Reaction score
1
For anyone interested, find my own personal outreach on my personal website at: FoolQuest.com. Find discussion whereupon here on this, the lonely life forum, at: https://www.alonelylife.com/threads...com-lets-talk-it-over-seriously-thanks.41509/

FoolQuest.com is an actual proposal in detail, how to combat loneliness. For one thing, I find the problem more complicated that just finding a partner for small talk chat. I only wish that I knew where and how to reach out, in order to foster serious discussion more deeply and purposefully, indeed as I attempt on FoolQuest.com. Such much, as to being myself!
 

Latest posts

Top