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Childhood Excitement Gone

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RandomFella

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Life has changed.

I remember when I was a kid, everything was new and exciting and fun. I could spend hours upon hours just doing one simple thing and it was great! This changed gradually the older I became.
I was always a gamer, so this is the perspective from a gamer for the most part. Games were still okay when I was 15. There would still be new ideas and concepts, which would keep it exciting. But when I was 16, it just wasn't fun anymore. And I don't think it has to do with the responsibilities of becoming older. As a lone wolf type of guy, there would still be plenty of time to play games, but I just didn't feel like it anymore.
After this, I would try new hobbies. I finally had internet access and many more options. I started reading Manga, watching Anime, horror movies and other things. I discovered online games and the first time I played it...it was just like in my childhood! Completely new and with other people I could talk to! Amazing! But all of it became boring too, eventually.

I realized that all those things were exciting because they were new. But nothing can remain new forever. I started to question my life and the point of everything. What's the meaning, what's the purpose of it all, when everything starts to become boring and unimportant to me? I still played new games on new consoles when they seemed like fun, with years of breaks inbetween, it still was exciting - for a while. But then, not long ago, I started to question the meaning behind it and lost my interest completely. Even the wish to make my own games vanished, because it would just be the same. Only new is exciting. But I seeked more, I seeked something meaningful.

In the end, I realized that the thing that I'm really looking for, was simply "love". Not talking about romantic stuff, since to me it's similar to games and will become boring and meaningless after some time.
As a lone wolf person, I was in the best spot. It was important that I just focus on myself, my inner voice, my true nature and what I really want. Wherever I went, I was most of the time deep in thoughts. True love isn't fun-related. It is just about feeling good. Games are fun. But this was just one example. Jokes can be fun too. Most hobbies actually. But I was wondering: What happens when every unique game is completed? When every possible joke is told? Again, to me, only new and unique things are fun. Similar things are boring to me from the get go. It seems unavoidable to reach the point where we have "seen it all".
I simply couldn't accept this. I can't accept that everything will become boring eventually. And thus lose it's meaning. But it's just a fact, it has to do with how the brain works. Trying to force it or still playing games out of habit doesn't change anything.

After I found my answers, basically my true nature and love, I wasn't interested in the "fun" anymore. No interest in the (to me) meaningless. It was an important change in my life.
Okay, it sounded a bit harsh. I enjoyed all those things in the past, so it wasn't meaningless. It was an amazing time and I can only be grateful for it. But the change and developement and acceptance was very important to find true happiness.
The way I feel now...is not full of adrenaline and excitement. It's far from it, in fact. I will probably never feel that way ever again. Maybe only if Aliens visit us on earth or something else crazy, this would be exciting. But even this would just become normalcy as well. It is awesome to feel this huge amount of excitement. But it's not meant to last forever, we experience it only so often in our lives. So...what's really important, what really matters, is what we have otherwise. With the love and my true nature, I just feel good and positive. I seek only love, not fun. I seek the things that compliment my life and nature. Fun things (or new things) are good and important for variety and they still happen when I don't expect it. It just became a side effect, basically. It's not what truly matters to me in life, it simply spices things up a little, surprises. If there is a new game concept that sounds amazing to me, I'm sure I will try it anyway. But never ever should it be the main focus in life. It doesn't and can't work, we can't have this constantly. Unless someone really *loves* games. But personally, I found what I love elswhere. :') To me it's all connected to my heart and nature, it comes from within and I feel attracted to things that speak to my very nature. If this isn't the case, it wouldn't give me fulfillment. Even logic can't help with this. Some things seem logical and make so much sense, but still are totally unfulfilling. These things can't be answered with logic. Really, no one can help with this.
The best thing we can do (in my opinion) is to be completely free from all outside influences. Just listening to our inner voice to find the answers we need. After knowing who we really are, we can build good and honest relationships too, if we want this. I think the chances are higher to find long-lasting friendships, when the other person reached the same level and found their true nature. Before this, life is just chaos, good and bad things - everything can happen. Just my opinion of course.
We became a strong foundation. In the end, no matter what happens, we know who we are. The foundation always remains.
I think people who can be happy with just the foundation are blessed, being alone might be their nature. Having the own little garden on the foundation, some beautiful flowers, maybe even butterflies flying around. But in my experience, I'm waaay more happy to connect my nature with other natures of the same kind. Not necessarily other lifeforms! But especially music. There may be millions of tracks and I can simply choose the music fitting to my nature or feelings. It is love. When I hear a good track for the first time, I'm super excited (fun). But afterwards, I just feel good with it (love). Even if I listen to music that is as old as me, every week, never bores me. But variety is important, just one song would be the same as only eating bread every day, haha.
Just a personal example. Love can be anything, depending on your nature. Even dead objects, doesn't matter. Only thing that matters is that it makes you feel good. And if it makes you feel good, you care. And this makes you an awesome and very lovely person in the end. :3

If you feel the same way as I do, do not worry. It is normal to lose the excitement we had as kids. It is a natural process when we become older. It can be frustrating and painful. It is better to accept the change. Excitement simply changes to feeling good, love. It is a different feel, but not worse. The good thing is, that the good feel is steady, while excitement is only temporary.

I have a question myself, if anyone knows the answer. How is it like to (constantly) risk the own life? Like, unsecured climbing on huge buildings, jumping on trains or whatnot. You may know these videos from YouTube. Will this become boring as well over time? Will people get used to this? Or the risk of losing the life will always keep it, uhm..."thrilling"? Just wondering.

Other than that, I'm just curious to hear about your opinions and experiences. :)

Thank you for reading!
 

Finished

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^ Ah, yes new is exciting an fun. I have always enjoyed exploring. I have seen, hiked, and climbed some really amazing things. But, I don't like to go back to revisit them no matter how awesome they are. It's just like.....hmmm. Seen it. Did. Done. There are no surprises.

After the first couple paragraphs I thought you were going to tell me that you found religion and how it filled your emptiness.

But, then you started talking about love and love in music. Then I realized you were actually talking about porn. It all makes sense if you substitute porn for music in the text above. Ha! ha!

I was one of those people that continually did dangerous stuff in search of an adrenaline high. Sometimes I would hope that some little thing would go wrong and I would actually die. It was great riding the border. But, in the end I didn't die. I did get hurt many times, sometimes bad. I still want that rush but I can no longer do the things necessary to get it. Just hurting myself doesn't get me the rush. So, for the most part I'm just waiting to die.
 

Forgottendanfan

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I'm almost incapable of feeling excited about anything now. I'm only 33, but it feels like all the new stuff in life I'm ever likely to experience, has already been sampled.
 

RandomFella

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Finished said:
But, then you started talking about love and love in music. Then I realized you were actually talking about porn. It all makes sense if you substitute porn for music in the text above. Ha! ha!
Before someone misunderstands: I really was talking about actual music, haha.

Forgottendanfan said:
I'm almost incapable of feeling excited about anything now. I'm only 33, but it feels like all the new stuff in life I'm ever likely to experience, has already been sampled.
It's a very difficult situation to be in... I was always fascinated by people, who seemingly have an endless passion for what they do. I know someone who still makes videos, daily, since 11 years. When I tried it I had enough after 1 month, haha. I always hoped to find this kind of passion for myself as well.
 

SquiddyKat

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I can relate. When I was little, the world was a 'magical' place. I was full of wonder, excitement, I was very emotional. Now, everything seems dull. I find myself looking for things that can bring it back, things from my childhood or remind me of it. I do get some feelings of excitement and stuff occasionally. I fantasise a lot, which can create a good feeling, but it's not the same.
 

Zen28

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I still feel excited and curious about things I like. We're all under such pressure to "grow up", some things about you never grow up though.
 

Tobakki3

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Nothing much to see here in this world of mine .
Maybe that is why i am feeling dull too
 

Just_another_one

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Well, children are guided in their development by their curiosity for new things. That's the way they learn, discovering, imitating, trying. Excitement is something they need to become adults.
Adults can still be excited and amused by new and old things, I still get involved in literature (I've become more picky but I still can find books I can't stop reading), music (I admit I keep on listening mostly to the same things, but sometimes I can find something new that attracts me), travelling (there are always new places to see) and many other things.
I've never been a gamer so I can't talk about it, for sure growing up you lose part of your imagination and maybe games become less involving.

I think if you set some goals in your life you don't get bored. Or at least this is how it works for me.
There's always something new to learn, like speaking a new language or playing an instrument, studying something new, trying to grow in your working field etc. For me life is about self development and that's what keeps me going on.
 

JJW

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This post took me back to being a boy in the dirt pushing my matchbox cars around. Oh, to be free of responsibility and enjoy the simple things.
 

Efbee

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Life has changed.

I remember when I was a kid, everything was new and exciting and fun. I could spend hours upon hours just doing one simple thing and it was great! This changed gradually the older I became.
I was always a gamer, so this is the perspective from a gamer for the most part. Games were still okay when I was 15. There would still be new ideas and concepts, which would keep it exciting. But when I was 16, it just wasn't fun anymore. And I don't think it has to do with the responsibilities of becoming older. As a lone wolf type of guy, there would still be plenty of time to play games, but I just didn't feel like it anymore.
After this, I would try new hobbies. I finally had internet access and many more options. I started reading Manga, watching Anime, horror movies and other things. I discovered online games and the first time I played it...it was just like in my childhood! Completely new and with other people I could talk to! Amazing! But all of it became boring too, eventually.

I realized that all those things were exciting because they were new. But nothing can remain new forever. I started to question my life and the point of everything. What's the meaning, what's the purpose of it all, when everything starts to become boring and unimportant to me? I still played new games on new consoles when they seemed like fun, with years of breaks inbetween, it still was exciting - for a while. But then, not long ago, I started to question the meaning behind it and lost my interest completely. Even the wish to make my own games vanished, because it would just be the same. Only new is exciting. But I seeked more, I seeked something meaningful.

In the end, I realized that the thing that I'm really looking for, was simply "love". Not talking about romantic stuff, since to me it's similar to games and will become boring and meaningless after some time.
As a lone wolf person, I was in the best spot. It was important that I just focus on myself, my inner voice, my true nature and what I really want. Wherever I went, I was most of the time deep in thoughts. True love isn't fun-related. It is just about feeling good. Games are fun. But this was just one example. Jokes can be fun too. Most hobbies actually. But I was wondering: What happens when every unique game is completed? When every possible joke is told? Again, to me, only new and unique things are fun. Similar things are boring to me from the get go. It seems unavoidable to reach the point where we have "seen it all".
I simply couldn't accept this. I can't accept that everything will become boring eventually. And thus lose it's meaning. But it's just a fact, it has to do with how the brain works. Trying to force it or still playing games out of habit doesn't change anything.

After I found my answers, basically my true nature and love, I wasn't interested in the "fun" anymore. No interest in the (to me) meaningless. It was an important change in my life.
Okay, it sounded a bit harsh. I enjoyed all those things in the past, so it wasn't meaningless. It was an amazing time and I can only be grateful for it. But the change and developement and acceptance was very important to find true happiness.
The way I feel now...is not full of adrenaline and excitement. It's far from it, in fact. I will probably never feel that way ever again. Maybe only if Aliens visit us on earth or something else crazy, this would be exciting. But even this would just become normalcy as well. It is awesome to feel this huge amount of excitement. But it's not meant to last forever, we experience it only so often in our lives. So...what's really important, what really matters, is what we have otherwise. With the love and my true nature, I just feel good and positive. I seek only love, not fun. I seek the things that compliment my life and nature. Fun things (or new things) are good and important for variety and they still happen when I don't expect it. It just became a side effect, basically. It's not what truly matters to me in life, it simply spices things up a little, surprises. If there is a new game concept that sounds amazing to me, I'm sure I will try it anyway. But never ever should it be the main focus in life. It doesn't and can't work, we can't have this constantly. Unless someone really *loves* games. But personally, I found what I love elswhere. :') To me it's all connected to my heart and nature, it comes from within and I feel attracted to things that speak to my very nature. If this isn't the case, it wouldn't give me fulfillment. Even logic can't help with this. Some things seem logical and make so much sense, but still are totally unfulfilling. These things can't be answered with logic. Really, no one can help with this.
The best thing we can do (in my opinion) is to be completely free from all outside influences. Just listening to our inner voice to find the answers we need. After knowing who we really are, we can build good and honest relationships too, if we want this. I think the chances are higher to find long-lasting friendships, when the other person reached the same level and found their true nature. Before this, life is just chaos, good and bad things - everything can happen. Just my opinion of course.
We became a strong foundation. In the end, no matter what happens, we know who we are. The foundation always remains.
I think people who can be happy with just the foundation are blessed, being alone might be their nature. Having the own little garden on the foundation, some beautiful flowers, maybe even butterflies flying around. But in my experience, I'm waaay more happy to connect my nature with other natures of the same kind. Not necessarily other lifeforms! But especially music. There may be millions of tracks and I can simply choose the music fitting to my nature or feelings. It is love. When I hear a good track for the first time, I'm super excited (fun). But afterwards, I just feel good with it (love). Even if I listen to music that is as old as me, every week, never bores me. But variety is important, just one song would be the same as only eating bread every day, haha.
Just a personal example. Love can be anything, depending on your nature. Even dead objects, doesn't matter. Only thing that matters is that it makes you feel good. And if it makes you feel good, you care. And this makes you an awesome and very lovely person in the end. :3

If you feel the same way as I do, do not worry. It is normal to lose the excitement we had as kids. It is a natural process when we become older. It can be frustrating and painful. It is better to accept the change. Excitement simply changes to feeling good, love. It is a different feel, but not worse. The good thing is, that the good feel is steady, while excitement is only temporary.

I have a question myself, if anyone knows the answer. How is it like to (constantly) risk the own life? Like, unsecured climbing on huge buildings, jumping on trains or whatnot. You may know these videos from YouTube. Will this become boring as well over time? Will people get used to this? Or the risk of losing the life will always keep it, uhm..."thrilling"? Just wondering.

Other than that, I'm just curious to hear about your opinions and experiences. :)

Thank you for reading!
 

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