Crushing online

[Dessa]

Anyone else had a crush or fallen in love with someone hundreds of miles away? I should rephrase. Anyone else made a friend online and realized your developing interest towards that person? Anyone believe in long distance relationships? You ever been in this situation before? Just curious, I guess. >.>

 

[Drama]

It happens. A lot.

 

[Dessa]

Oh yes.

 

[floffyschneeman]

(hmm) yeah this happens, a lot. It's honeysuckle, btw. ^^

 

[Dessa]

Aw. I know right. You know nevermind the distance, but people's expressions kill me inside. I don't know whether they're serious or sarcastic. Too much work.

 

[floffyschneeman]

Aw. I know right. You know nevermind the distance, but people's expressions kill me inside. I don't know whether they're serious or sarcastic. Too much work.

yes, I feel that >.< that's why I don't like myself when I am liking someone cos I'm like a bludger on the loose, very unstable and too emotional. It is so draining -_-

 

[Callie]

I've never had a long distance romantic relationship before, but I do have a few friends that I love that are "long distance." I know it's not nearly the same, but, if you want something, you should go for it. Don't find excuses NOT to do it, but live in the moment and see where it takes you. It may be a risk, but if you never risk anything, you never gain anything.

 

[Drama]

That's true, Callie.

 

[floffyschneeman]

I've never had a long distance romantic relationship before, but I do have a few friends that I love that are "long distance." I know it's not nearly the same, but, if you want something, you should go for it. Don't find excuses NOT to do it, but live in the moment and see where it takes you. It may be a risk, but if you never risk anything, you never gain anything.

I agree.

 

[Badjedidude]

Yeah. I'd say it's inevitable, given enough time and talking.

The problem is deciding whether to let it die out naturally as a momentary online interest or to pursue it as an actual relationship... and either option is at the very least difficult and sometimes even painful.

*shrug*

 

[Peter Lorre]

Well, there's gradations in long distance obviously; I've been in one with someone who lived at that time on the other side of Europe (We did meet here in Brussels though). It can work, and it did work for us for a long time... it's just, you both need to be willing to work hard for it and make some sacrifices. It can be costly too, but all in all, I'd say I believe in it.

But yeah, I won't be lying to you: there's times when the missing can really drive you crazy

 

[Callie]

Yeah. I'd say it's inevitable, given enough time and talking.

The problem is deciding whether to let it die out naturally as a momentary online interest or to pursue it as an actual relationship... and either option is at the very least difficult and sometimes even painful.

*shrug*

Is it really any different in real life?

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Errr..the on line thing can drive you batty..Serously I could have easily
get together with someone I met on here..but shes like far..far away...
which made it difficualt for us to move it to the next level. She still calls me and we had form a friendship. Which is good
Its kind of like having a relationship wiht god though...I need skin to skin contact.
Heck even as of the moment my baby/fiance is on her way here. It drives me crazy just the same when she say" Honey, everytime I talk to ya...I get really really horney" .lol

 

[Elgin]

I think the internet is good for introducing people but to have a real relationship you have to have real time one on one. It's to easy for people to scam you on just the time you can put into talking on the phone or computer and that's just talk. You need to be together to see if its real or not. It can begin on-line but to go on it's got to hit RT.

 

[raimey]

I've been in two relationships that started online. One lasted a year and a half, part of which we lived together. One lasted two weeks. It depends.

 

[Cosmo]

My last two major relationships were long distance for part/all of it. Communication is the key. Unfortunately in this last one I simply wasn't getting what I needed out of it despite the distance. =/ Might have been because of various factors: lack of her being able to communicate/act lovingly towards me, me being not as into her as she was into me, or the ..er... rather huge age gap between us. I'm trying now to look for women more my age and someone closer. It's hard though.

LDRs need a couple things to last: Good communication, trust, and always a plan to see one another as soon as possible. The last gives you something to look forward to.

 

[Peter Lorre]

My last two major relationships were long distance for part/all of it. Communication is the key. Unfortunately in this last one I simply wasn't getting what I needed out of it despite the distance. =/ Might have been because of various factors: lack of her being able to communicate/act lovingly towards me, me being not as into her as she was into me, or the ..er... rather huge age gap between us. I'm trying now to look for women more my age and someone closer. It's hard though.

LDRs need a couple things to last: Good communication, trust, and always a plan to see one another as soon as possible. The last gives you something to look forward to.

Yeah, I agree with that list. You might not see eachother that much, but when you do it really feels special.

Anyway, 'if you will it, it is no dream'

 

[floffyschneeman]

One has to be really strong for a long distance relationship, or really committed. But I understand people for not choosing it, I admire them even to know what they want and not settle on things they know they can't handle. I've seen it work out in people so I do believe it's real. It just varies from person to person.

 

[Badjedidude]

Is it really any different in real life?

Yes.

Often the decision(s) is/are easier in real life, because there's not distance involved, generally speaking. If you meet Sally Mrs. Hotpants in the store and develop a crush for her, you're generally more able to pursue a relationship; physically, emotionally, romantically, etc. Online you miss the physical aspect (and I don't just mean sex... being able to look into each other's eyes in person, smell, etc). And it's sometimes harder to reach each other when distance is involved.

So there's usually a confusion as to whether or not to pursue an online relationship... there's not enough information or experience with each other to give a good basis for a judgment call on if the relationship would last or not. I mean... you can LIKE or even LOVE someone as much as you want, but if there's no solidity to a possible relationship... then you're just setting yourself up for future pain.

Life isn't a romance movie where everything magically works out for the hero who fights against all hope. If you think a relationship may not work, then chances are it won't; if only just because you've already decided so in your heart.

*shrug*

Anyway, that's a jumbled way of saying YES there's a difference. lol

 

[nerdygirl]

You know what? If you find somebody perfect for you who is far away, I think you should give it a shot. Physical distance between two people who are an ideal match is so much easier to overcome than the emotional distance between two people who aren't right for each other. My last relationship was over the internet, phone, and snail mail. Of the relationships I've had, it was the healthiest and happiest.

I got my best friend to try an online RPG with me. She ended up marrying one of the guys we met there. Her brother also married somebody he met online.