Depressed that I will never find the love of my life

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user 188830

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Hello, not going to lie I’ve been depressed and being lonely has taken a deep emotional and psychological toll on me recently.. yes.. i have a good graduate job (i’m just 22, graduated last year, happy with my life but i have no friends and no girlfriend). I am appreciateve of the fact that I work what I really enjoy doing but money really doesn’t bring me any happiness when my life literally is 9 - 5 and nothing else! And I literally mean NOTHING else! I spend my down time alone as I don’t find motivation to even go on walks as I have no one to do it with. A bit of context about me: i’ve spent a few hundred pounds on dating apps and invested so much time into it ( been trying to find the love of my life since 2018 ) with no real success. I read online how to combat lonliness and how to meet people alternative to dating apps and one option was through online forums. I honestly can’t understand why no girl wants to seriously commit to a relationship and actually bother to chat and show interest in continuing chatting. Like is it too much to ask for anyways!! It doesnt help that I am socially awkward too, as I find it hard to make eye contact as I am too shy and lack confidence ( probably normal for a girl but not for a boy ). And usually they expect boys to reach out and I do try through messages but in real life I just can’t. I feel anxious if I do so. I am just so done with my life just revolving around just money, I don’t even want many friends. Just one girlfriend would be enough, just to know someone out there who cares about me and that I can get close to.
 
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you are not alone we are all searching for connections friendship, companionship, etc. glad that you are doing well in your career there are many people on this site are looking for friends I'm sure you will find many different people who would love to conversate with you if you are willing. Don't think you are alone in your shyness or awkwardness or any other traits that define you it just makes you unique. Hope that you find many friends here and in life if you are new welcome to the site hope you enjoy your time here.
 
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Welcome to the forum! Acquiring a girl friend can be really tough when you are shy. One way is to try to make your way into a group of friends. Usually someone wants to play match maker and will help find you someone. But, if you are trying to do it all by yourself you need to be attractive and out going even if you have to fake it.
 
First off, Im a 43 year old woman, clearly I don't understand what it is like to be a teenage boy, a young man, middle aged man, or older man. I can say that I've had lots of experiences and varying relationships with all sorts of personality types women and men both. As long as you are being yourself, putting forth effort to actually engage with women, and expressing confidence in yourself you will eventually run up on someone that you click with. Sometimes people get so consumed by what they want, Im guilty of this myself, they fail to see or listen to what other people want or need. I know this probably sounds silly or simp!e minded but it is possible for a person to be to be their own jailer. It may or may not have anything to do with how you are or arent what you've experienced and what you haven't, the way you behave or the way you dont, but rather that person has convinced him/herself of things that hinder connections with other people. I am just speaking from my experiences. Also, the older you get the easier it gets to just accept things for what they are but if you want something bad enough you don't ever give up. But.... Im a woman and apparently women have it easier than men or so I've been told.
 
Man, 22 is nothing. And before you probably roll your eyes at that comment realise that there's people out there that's in your situation only worse, with age against them and work satisfaction practically at zero. You still have load of time on your side, and at 22 years old not many people are actually looking for the type of relationship you are... that's not to say that it's impossible, but at "your age" most often than not people aren't looking for such a serious relationships.

I get why you think the way you do; not everyone likes being alone. But remember you [most likely] have the freedom NOW you wouldn't have in a relationship. What motivation do you expect to get from BEING with someone that you don't have now having the freedom to do what you like.. whenever you like? You're NOT running out of time, don't put pressure on yourself.
 
welcome to the forum site,we all know how you feel on here,all you have to do is ask for advice If and when you need it,and please feel free to chat on here if you want to,I hope you enjoy it here.
 
It's not abnormal these days to be 22 without experience, just don't waste the rest your twenties wallowing with solitary hobbies like gaming.

Shy men need a social circle. It's essential to look like you're integrated and accepted somewhere, even if it's a group of fellow introverts. You cannot get away with appearing to be loner, particularly in your age group.
 
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Join a karate class to build self-confidence & courage.
If your not hansome & want to meet a woman, go to a pub around 10pm.

Only you can change YOU. :cool:

Otherwise it will be a life of "Big Bang Theory" reruns until ya croak.....:sick:
 

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