Do we have a communication issue or what is the problem?

[Jsos]

But like that's my point if it matters that much to them or if they can extrapolate and think it goes deeper then you're not going to change someone. Even if they don't have depression. It's just going to be the same fights for the rest of your life. I think you think it can be resolved because cleaning is such a small problem compared to like a terminal illness, but it's a pretty significant part of your daily life. If by resolved you mean they just get over it an do the cleaning themselves well see sentence 1 of my first post lol. If they want more than that and it's important then it's probably not going to be resolved.

Some people are saying make him pay for a cleaning service. If cleaning is something he puts literally no value in do you think he's going to agree to spend money he could spend on stuff he likes? I guess I'm assuming he's not rich.

I can comment on that. Lol No, he’s not rich but he makes good money. So do I. We talked last night about hiring someone. He is willing to at least consider paying for it. I have a call with a cleaning company today. Honestly if that fixes this issue, I’m all for it.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

You know what... I had a lightbulb... if all else fails im not sure of your schedules but you can share tasks, like one washes the dishes the other one dries... at the same time, and laundry one loads the other one hangs them up or dries and folds them up... I mean this is my best bet of what I would suggest as a couples counsellor...

 

[Jsos]

We just hired a cleaning a service to come twice a month so let’s see how that goes and yes, he is paying for it.

 

[ringwood]

We just hired a cleaning a service to come twice a month so let’s see how that goes and yes, he is paying for it.

I think that’s the best solution when couples differ on standards of cleanliness. Hope it works out for you guys.

 

[ringwood]

This is what I did, I can't abide having to do any kind of housework so have a cleaner once a week. Strangely enough I now spend a good few hours doing housework the day before she comes in, she does a few houses on my street and is a gossip, I don't want her telling people my house is filthy.

That’s hilarious. Does she gossip to you about how filthy your neighbour’s houses are?

You realize you could probably save yourself a ton of money by imagining you have a cleaner coming in each week and just continue doing your own housework?

 

[randomguy]

That’s hilarious. Does she gossip to you about how filthy your neighbour’s houses are?

Ah mate, she never bloody stops, apparently the Vicar has the filthiest house she's ever seen and hides bottles of gin all over the place.

When I started seeing the girl across the street, she didn't know I was seeing her, she told me ' Her across the roads brought new knickers, poor loves probably having to lapdance on the internet to pay her bills. It's bloody shocking what these girls have to do nowadays to make ends meet. '

You realize you could probably save yourself a ton of money by imagining you have a cleaner coming in each week and just continue doing your own housework?

Hahahah I'd only end up doing bloody imaginary housework the day before innit

 

[CenotaphGirl]

We just hired a cleaning a service to come twice a month so let’s see how that goes and yes, he is paying for it.

Wayyyy!!!! I hope it works out for you both

 

[Anarchic Torchic]

@Tfranklinyo yeah those were my asumptions. I also didnt consider hiring a cleaner. But hey its resolved now, thats occams razor for you right there.

Also like @Ceno said, maybe you can do things together.

 

[user 188644]

@Tfranklinyo yeah those were my asumptions. I also didnt consider hiring a cleaner. But hey its resolved now, thats occams razor for you right there.

Also like @Ceno said, maybe you can do things together.

Yeah I just hard disagree. I think over complicating a problem assumes that you have remotely close to complete information. The fact that the thread is titled "Do we have a communication problem?" leads to the assumption that it's a deeper problem and not some silly bullshit literally fixed by hiring a cleaning service.

 

[Jsos]

Yeah I just hard disagree. I think over complicating a problem assumes that you have remotely close to complete information. The fact that the thread is titled "Do we have a communication problem?" leads to the assumption that it's a deeper problem and not some silly bullshit literally fixed by hiring a cleaning service.

I don’t disagree with that. The title isn’t totally innocent of that but at the same time that’s what I was wondering as to why we’re not getting on the same page with the cleaning. Just because we hired a cleaning person does not mean that I’m going to stop looking for a couples therapist. He knows that I still feel like we need that but hopefully this alleviates some of the stress by having someone come and clean on a regular basis.