Do You Blame Your Unhappiness On Yourself Or Others?

[Trevor]

I only ask this because in my experience I used to blame myself for my unhappiness. Constantly wondering what the hell was wrong with me. This must be why others didn't like me. This must be why nobody wanted to hang out with me. As I got older and learned more about life I figured out what was wrong with my way of thinking and I just wanted to share it with you all who may be in the same boat I was in back then, now. What helped me was setting goals however little, to accomplish. Anything from building model planes, finishing jigsaw puzzles and even solving a Rubik's Cube without cheating. Accomplishing these goals gave me confidence in myself and self-respect followed after that. When you gain self-respect and take pride in what you do, others will respect you for it. I hope that this little tidbit of experience helps some of you.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I blame myself, too trusting, stupid, immature, loving and dumb to see a honeysuckle situation for what it is. I am so fed up with dealing with my poor decisions. Fed up of being a punching bag for insults all the time… but I mean whats a girl to do… I’m not gonna tolerate being called anything but my name anymore and if someone has this big issue with me… they can simply leave… no need for putting people down… the door has never been locked. People seem to want you but to keep ypu they think they have to shoot yourself esteem… I must have forgotten who I am???!!?!?? I cant believe I let people think they can speak to me any how they want… I must be out of my mind…Im not tolerating… im done.

 

[ztyu123]

Everyone's and everything's suffering and unhappiness including the planet itself is directly the result of whatever created and designed everything.

It's not our fault.
It's whatever created everything

 

[Sunless Sky]

It's not my fault its everybody else. I am nice, polite, and trustworthy. I should be drowning in love and affection but girls only want bad guys who treat them like garbage because they confuse that dickish attitude with confidence and being nice with weakness and then they have the gall to complain when they get abused physically or emotionally. It's their fault for not seeing the signs and red flags for what they are.


















Jk, I know I am the one to blame. I don't put myself out there and into social situations where I might meet a good woman. I feel anxious and scared sometimes but I know in my heart of hearts that I will probably be fine and even have a couple of good conversations.

 

[TheRealCallie]

At the end of the day, you are responsible for how you react to things. If you are unhappy, you need to figure out why and change that if you can, accept it if you can't and move on. Find a way to be happy, no one else can do that for you.

 

[randomguy]

I blame all my unhappiness on pretty girls, there's so many of them and life's soooooo bloody short.

 

[Finished]

I blame my DNA. So, that means mom and dad. It's partly why I got fixed. I didn't want to pass on the ******* gene.

 

[roses4all]

I figure there is lots of blame to go around. No one is gonna get off scot-free.

 

[constant stranger]

I don't really enjoy living my life, never have, except for a few transient episodes of gladness. I blame myself. My family, parents two brothers and myself were all subject to versions of the same low self esteem demon, and that didn't help. But in the end, I own the responsibility for buying into it.....and my journey isn't over yet. I probably won't ever be a pollyanna happy type guy, but I expect to leave this world at least somewhat contented.......not bitter and blaming other people like the three already deceased family members have done.

 

[TropicalStarfish]

I blame my unhappiness on you! You #$#***))*@!!!!

Joking...

I think taking responsibility for one's state of mind is the best way to go, even if your state of mind, or circumstances, are largely the fault of another or others. I probably don't always do that; but, it seems the optimal route, to own one's circumstances, and go from there... That's an easy thing to say, however. Putting it into practice can be very difficult...

Blame itself, is probably a big problem. I'm not sure blaming, ever really accomplishes much. What's done is done. The question is: what now to do about it?

 

[Finished]

While we can't control much of what happens to us. We can perceive things any way that we want to do so. So, although extremely difficult, IMO, we can control our own happiness. As for myself, I'm only willing to put in enough effort to usually be calm and relaxed. I try to watch funny shows and funny movies whenever I can. I also search for happy things on the Internet.

 

[user 188685]

At the end of the day, you are responsible for how you react to things. If you are unhappy, you need to figure out why and change that if you can, accept it if you can't and move on. Find a way to be happy, no one else can do that for you.

I agree

 

[Adamridge79]

Oh, it's definitely all me. I'm the only constant, and I don't change, so nothing changes, so I'm the control group in this experiment.