Do you love yourself?
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user 176211
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This isn´t something that I finally started facing until later in life. When I was younger, I saw it as just another platitude they teach on talk shows for women. But then I started realizing that it applies to everyone´s life.
Now I feel like most people take it super literal and think you have to pamper yourself and have a great sense of self esteem before you can date or share yourself with other people. But the reality is that more times than often, you can ¨love yourself ¨ by accepting things about yourself that others won´t. I myself have struggled with my looks and weight my whole life. Even when, in retrospect, I had nothing to worry about. I see old photos and realize I was a great looking kid. But I didn´t fit some random stranger´s ideas of what I ¨should¨ look like. And I let those words beat me down until I really DIDN´T care about myself. And I ended up being exactly what they THOUGHT I was.
For me, loving myself was completely abandoning and letting go the importance of what everyone else things of me and thinks in general. Literally none of it matters, and you will one day realize that everyone is fighting some secret demons. You can´t afford to let meaningless scars they give you impact the rest of your life.
Loving yourself is recognizing that everyone else is just as clueless as you are about navigating through life, and you´re all trying to figure it out (instead of keeping up with the Jones´)
Now I feel like most people take it super literal and think you have to pamper yourself and have a great sense of self esteem before you can date or share yourself with other people. But the reality is that more times than often, you can ¨love yourself ¨ by accepting things about yourself that others won´t. I myself have struggled with my looks and weight my whole life. Even when, in retrospect, I had nothing to worry about. I see old photos and realize I was a great looking kid. But I didn´t fit some random stranger´s ideas of what I ¨should¨ look like. And I let those words beat me down until I really DIDN´T care about myself. And I ended up being exactly what they THOUGHT I was.
For me, loving myself was completely abandoning and letting go the importance of what everyone else things of me and thinks in general. Literally none of it matters, and you will one day realize that everyone is fighting some secret demons. You can´t afford to let meaningless scars they give you impact the rest of your life.
Loving yourself is recognizing that everyone else is just as clueless as you are about navigating through life, and you´re all trying to figure it out (instead of keeping up with the Jones´)
Sarah G
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I don't love myself but I have come to accept that I'm lovable and worthy of love (on good days). If we're not raised feeling loved and wanted it's so much work to feel loved. I've started to make peace with myself but sometimes I hate myself for falling into the same old traps that lead to getting hurt.
user 176211
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I couldn´t agree with this more!
I wish that more people understood this. If you are raised being taught to swim, you can swim. If you are raised being taught to paint, you can be an artist. But if you are raised and you´re constantly given the message that you are a burden or otherwise lesser than, you´ll struggle with that in life.
I am sorry you had to feel that way and that this is something you consciously have to deal with that while other people drift throughout all of life without ever becoming conscious that confidence is something that is given to you early in life, like handing someone a passport. Some of us don´t get the passport, and then get treated like vagabonds.
I wish you much peace and love and acceptance in your journey of life.
Just Games
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Er...no.Maybe its a boomer thing but I feel its a waste of time.I think it's more important to love others that are close to you and show it as much as possible.
Alright my parents didn't show me alot of affection as a kid that I can remember but I was always out and about in a gang or playing by myself.My parents would just do there own thing I was left to my own devices until my mother in my 20's would give me a hug when off on holidays and would say that she loved me.This maybe why I've never really thought about it.
I would I suppose be a bit vane checking my Barnet or suit/clothes in a passing mirror just to check I looked sharp enough but that was just in that moment .I don't really think that's loving yourself.
Funnily enough I was asked this by my kid the other day and I just couldn't answer because I've never really thought about it..as above
But really you lot worry about alot more stuff than we did.
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Well said, totally agree.
i think loving yourself, not in a selfish way, but in a healthy way should be top priority. we're all searching for someone to love or someone to love us but people weather they be your fam friends or partner won't always be there.
so the number one person to love, as in show kindness to, forgive, motivate, take care of your health is yourself. i dont mean you cant help others. you should because good karma will get back to you if you help other people. pride isn't bad it's actually bad when you start becoming an arrogant *******.
so the number one person to love, as in show kindness to, forgive, motivate, take care of your health is yourself. i dont mean you cant help others. you should because good karma will get back to you if you help other people. pride isn't bad it's actually bad when you start becoming an arrogant *******.
Sarah G
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Thank you so much.
user 176211
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So why does it have to be a ¨boomer¨ thing? Can you live outside of your own world long enough to even realize that maybe not everyone had chill parents that did their own thing? Are you even capable of conceding that there are parents out there who actively take out their own traumas, whether purposefully or not, on their own kids? Maybe not everyone has the whole Brady Bunch thing going in their families. Your parents may have been doing their own thing, but it doesn´t sound like you ever picked up a remote idea that other people don´t get to have the same life you did.Er...no.Maybe its a boomer thing but I feel its a waste of time.I think it's more important to love others that are close to you and show it as much as possible.
Alright my parents didn't show me alot of affection as a kid that I can remember but I was always out and about in a gang or playing by myself.My parents would just do there own thing I was left to my own devices until my mother in my 20's would give me a hug when off on holidays and would say that she loved me.This maybe why I've never really thought about it.
I would I suppose be a bit vane checking my Barnet or suit/clothes in a passing mirror just to check I looked sharp enough but that was just in that moment .I don't really think that's loving yourself.
Funnily enough I was asked this by my kid the other day and I just couldn't answer because I've never really thought about it..as above
But really you lot worry about alot more stuff than we did.
And yes, some people DO worry about a lot more than you may have had to. As it turns out, the world is full of people from all walks of life with their own sets of challenges and crosses to carry. I don´t think that is a generational thing.
Just Games
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Yes it's silly isn't it.That I rely on my youngest's opinion that alot of what I say fits that generation even though my age doesn't .
The Brady bunch.Yes I saw that once,happy middle class family with loving parents.Of course my parents were perfect and chill I'm glad that your here to tell me that.
The Brady bunch.Yes I saw that once,happy middle class family with loving parents.Of course my parents were perfect and chill I'm glad that your here to tell me that.
Hand cream and sock at the ready. Let the loving commence!
Love myself, I've never been that enthusiastic. However, I do at least like myself. I'm well aware of my flaws, and notable aspects too.
I think as we get older, many of us grow into the person that we should have been much earlier in life. Although, I still learn new things about myself and abilities.
We are all stuck with ourselves for a lifetime. You might as well try to enjoy it. Obviously, don't be a dick.
Love myself, I've never been that enthusiastic. However, I do at least like myself. I'm well aware of my flaws, and notable aspects too.
I think as we get older, many of us grow into the person that we should have been much earlier in life. Although, I still learn new things about myself and abilities.
We are all stuck with ourselves for a lifetime. You might as well try to enjoy it. Obviously, don't be a dick.
I'm not sure. Neutral seems to be a good word. Maybe understanding to some extent. If anything I tend to get frustrated and inpatient with I and my choices or their lack, but thankfully less now than in the past. I love myself when I feel loved, dislike or hate when I sense I'm more of a nuisance in others' eyes; sometimes, ashamed of my presence.
I tend to like chaos and imperfections like, poorly cared for plants, broken and chipped cups, used and second hand items still being used or brought back to life, the history behind them. Often, they are beyond repair but with some decorative or aesthetic dimension or intimate history. I feel like one of them, broken, imperfect, sometimes barely useful, sometimes dying, and this is what I like about myself, but there is no inherent love or hate.
I hate my ramblings though, and long sentences
I tend to like chaos and imperfections like, poorly cared for plants, broken and chipped cups, used and second hand items still being used or brought back to life, the history behind them. Often, they are beyond repair but with some decorative or aesthetic dimension or intimate history. I feel like one of them, broken, imperfect, sometimes barely useful, sometimes dying, and this is what I like about myself, but there is no inherent love or hate.
I hate my ramblings though, and long sentences
solonely20
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Nope
Likes chaos, imperfection. Has rambling long sentences. You should be a politician.I'm not sure. Neutral seems to be a good word. Maybe understanding to some extent. If anything I tend to get frustrated and inpatient with I and my choices or their lack, but thankfully less now than in the past. I love myself when I feel loved, dislike or hate when I sense I'm more of a nuisance in others' eyes; sometimes, ashamed of my presence.
I tend to like chaos and imperfections like, poorly cared for plants, broken and chipped cups, used and second hand items still being used or brought back to life, the history behind them. Often, they are beyond repair but with some decorative or aesthetic dimension or intimate history. I feel like one of them, broken, imperfect, sometimes barely useful, sometimes dying, and this is what I like about myself, but there is no inherent love or hate.
I hate my ramblings though, and long sentences
TheRealCallie
Princess Pink Love
Used to love myself, then I hated myself (That would be the first time I was here) Now....I don't know if I'll ever actually LOVE myself again, but I'm content with myself and honestly, that's okay with me.
Why not. I can even lie profusely and smoothly when needed.Likes chaos, imperfection. Has rambling long sentences. You should be a politician.
I think shame gets in there somewhere in our childhood and it's like a resistant infection -- it is really hard to get rid of once it gets in there... and it causes all sorts of honeysuckle to happen. I, for one, am very happy that you are here.
Abstamyous
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At this point, I feel a lot of trust and respect within myself and my life, so I guess I do.
