Had to cut off contact with my friend now i really miss her

[hewhowalksalone]

It wasnt an easy decision to make - fact is it was difficult to be around her with my uncontrollable thoughts and feelings making it weird.

So i told her how i felt and explained that i will step back from the support group as i felt she needed it more than i do. She said she understands but asked me not to make any further contact (a wish that i do not plan to violate!).

I have kept in touch with a couple of the others but now im wishing i had just dealt with it cos at least shed still be in my life.

 

[isthatso]

So mixed feelings? It was hard to be around her, yet you miss her,
I think I can get attached to people even I don't like them. We get used to their idiosyncrasies.

 

[hewhowalksalone]

So mixed feelings? It was hard to be around her, yet you miss her,
I think I can get attached to people even I don't like them. We get used to their idiosyncrasies.

It wasnt actually difficult to be around her - wrong use of words. I loved being around her but i was left pining for her afterwards.

The head tells you itll never happen but the heart wants what it wants.

 

[okidoke]

I can empathise with your situation some. I had to cut ties with a friend of 40 years. I missed her heaps.

 

[isthatso]

My experience of blocking people on Facebook and Twitter, transferred to my real life. That would make interesting research...how our online personality gradually morphs into real life.
I blocked a few real life friends over the last 5 years. I'm relieved but they aren't easy to replace.

 

[hewhowalksalone]

My experience of blocking people on Facebook and Twitter, transferred to my real life. That would make interesting research...how our online personality gradually morphs into real life.
I blocked a few real life friends over the last 5 years. I'm relieved but they aren't easy to replace.

Was it to do with one-sided attraction or were they toxic?

 

[isthatso]

Was it to do with one-sided attraction or were they toxic?

We had simply grown apart. We changed. We no longer click as close friends.

 

[Sometimes]

Once, a long time ago, in a moment of utter madness, I transitioned a friendship to an intimate relationship. OMG, what a mistake. It rolled along for a few months with me thinking "this ain't gonna work". Near the end of this I got a proposal of marriage, an option to make this situation permanent. Apparently my angst wasn't shared at all. It was a lesson in how differently people can view the same experience.

 

[LonelySgt]

Once, a long time ago, in a moment of utter madness, I transitioned a friendship to an intimate relationship. OMG, what a mistake. It rolled along for a few months with me thinking "this ain't gonna work". Near the end of this I got a proposal of marriage, an option to make this situation permanent. Apparently my angst wasn't shared at all. It was a lesson in how differently people can view the same experience.

We you clear in the beginning that all you wanted was meaningless sex? Did you lead him on in order to get what you wanted (meaningless sex)? Did you care about him and the consequences of your actions and what it would mean for the both of you?

 

[Sometimes]

We you clear in the beginning that all you wanted was meaningless sex? Did you lead him on in order to get what you wanted (meaningless sex)? Did you care about him and the consequences of your actions and what it would mean for the both of you?

I'm afraid it wasn't that simple. I never wanted meaningless sex, and I really thought I knew what I was doing at the start. I didn't. We were both immature, and would have been miserable if we'd married. He found someone he liked wayyy more than me and I'm sure he was more happy with. You never know.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I think the whole thing sounds harsh, many men are infatuated with me, in love with me, in lust with me, obsessed with me... I'd never tell them to stop using a support service... even some men on this forum have had their moments... not dropping any indirect on any currently active members these guys are long gone (or at least pretend to be lmaoo let me not....)... but... it got sad fast, However, I was still happy they used the forum, didnt interact with me personally and stayed in an environment where they felt welcomed and supported.

As for missing her, thats normal, but idolising her wont help, replace replace replace, the quicker the better. Hopefully with someone who wants what you want and respects you.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I'd never tell them to stop using a support service... even some men on this forum have had their moments... However, I was still happy they used the forum, didnt interact with me personally and stayed in an environment where they felt welcomed and supported.

As for missing her, thats normal, but idolising her wont help, replace replace replace, the quicker the better. Hopefully with someone who wants what you want and respects you.

I agree with this.

There really IS a first time for everything. (Just kidding. Lol)

 

[LonelySgt]

I'm afraid it wasn't that simple. I never wanted meaningless sex, and I really thought I knew what I was doing at the start. I didn't. We were both immature, and would have been miserable if we'd married. He found someone he liked wayyy more than me and I'm sure he was more happy with. You never know.

I personally believe in karma. There is positive and negative. You should be more conscious of your actions. Yeah we make mistakes but it you purposely do things maliciously even if it’s 1% malicious it is that malicious. I pray you find what you are looking for without hurting others in the process.