I want to kill myself, I just can't take it much longer

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Chris 2

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I can't stand this life, can't stand my life. I have live for 20 years in self-isolation. I can't take this much longer. Society remind me off how lonely I am. I see groups of people all the time, and it make me feel like honeysuckle. At night I can't even sleep, I wet my bed with tears. I can't sit or sleep still, I feel sick. I keep dreaming of white girls, I want them in my arm, I want to hold their hand and kiss them.

I been in an accident last year that almost cost me my life, and I really wish it did. Why am I still alive? I could have die and be at peace.

I could be a white fat tall guy and get laid every night. I could be a complete jerk and A-hole and I would get all the white girls I want. Unfortunately the only white girls that like me are online and are either in different state or another country, and country music is not enough to keep me alive or sane. Because once I realize who sing it, it make me lonely. I just want a white girl, why is it so hard?

I wish I was white, I don't think I am continue living as an Asian male. I can't continue living this lonely. I don't care if I'm good looking or not, I'm still an Asian male that have to deal with a bunch of stereotype.

I don't get it? Why would a girl date an Ass hole just cause he white? I'm Asian, we suppose to be the most popular race of guy cause we treat girl like princess. I don't get it, it too much for me to handle right now. I wish I had a gun right now.

I could be the cutest Asian guy and still can't get those girls, but if I was fat, I have a better chance. I might go crazy one day and starting killing people, mostly white guy I can't stand. Things better change, my dark side is taking over me, and I don't know how long I can become sane or alive. I want to hang myself, run onto ongoing traffic, rape a girl so that I know what sex is like, go on a murder rampage, etc...
 
Go play a game. Do anything to take your mind of how your feeling. Call a help line. You have to do something about the way your feeling right now. Its dangers when you start thinking like this.

If knowing what sex is like to you is so important to you then visit a prostitute. I am sure raping a girl well not make you feel better about your self. If you do get away with it you well have that guilt for the rest of your life. But I don't think you would hurt anyone else anyway.

IDK what to say to you mate. I have felt like you have many times be for. You just have to find something to take your mind of it. Go get some fresh air.
 
That's some heavy stuff there mate..............you need to try and chill out.

I also think about suicide on a daily basis, but not going on murder rampages or comitting rape!

My life is so honeysuckle that I spent 17 hours in bed Friday evening to Saturday midday, and another 12 hours in bed last night, because I simply have nothing else to do. Its misery at a new low for me.
But I'm scared of dying, so I'm stuck here for now :(

As for dating, I'm in the same boat too. No one seems interested, and I'm white
 
Chris,
I am going to be totaly brutal with you. Your desperation is going to be your downfall.
Being white does not automatically make you a chick magnet.
Being asian is not a curse.
Society hasnt caused your problem, nor the groups that are found within it.
It is how you see yourself that is the problem and you are not helping yourself by wallowing in your self pity at not being able to get laid or get a girl friend and using your Asian backround as an excuse.
The fact that you are talking about going nutz, raping, murder someone, and harming yourself makes me think that you should go and get some real proper help, go and talk to a counciller, before you realy do hurt someone or yourself.
Im not being nasty chris, just concerned.
 
Being Asian gets you laid, you know how I can tell? Asia's population. There is no shortage of Asians, obviously they are breeding.

You want a white chick? And you are just desperate and want to get laid? You don't genuinely want a girl who actually likes you and just need to get your rocks off? Do what a guy I know does, find the easy liquored up types, or go find yourself a prostitute, an escort service, a stripper of easy morals, or something else of the sort. Maybe if you valued people as human beings and not as tokens of achievement this might be easier for you. Why not go the easy route and just become filthy stinking rich? Gold diggers come in all colors.
 
Chris, I have a number for you. Please call it!
1-800-784-2433. You don't have to give them your name. They are there just to listen. Please call it as soon as you read this. We are worried about you!
 
I have to ask you....
Have you asked anyone out ?
I told you again and again, my sponsor made me date.
It ment I had to ask and apporched women again and again.
It also ment I got rejected again and again
It also ment I got stood up again and again.
It also ment I had ask more chicks out after I dated them becuase things didn't work .
It also ment I felt like honeysuckle after each let down.
It also ment I had to juggled women after a while becuase they all started calling me.

It also ment...I fucken followed simple instructions.
I asked beautiful women out even when i was scared and shaking out of my god **** boots.
I asked women out again and again even if i didn't wanted to, when I rather crawl under my god **** sheets
and soak in my self pity.
I asked women out again and again even after I got put into the freind zone :p
Non of the instructions given to me included hanging myself or hurting anyone.

God **** it...my sponsor was such as gardenia sometimes...I rather ask babes out than
rather have to listen to him ***** at me....

I'm not going to answer your threads or PMs anymore.
You don't bother to read my replies.
I tried be there for you as a friend...obviousely my friendship to you is not worth live for.
fresia dude, I cant do it for you....I can't ask a girl out for you.
If I did....she would be going out witn me.

I'm fucken about as yellow as can be.
So you don't have a fucken excuse for any of your BS.

Yes, I have a fucken attitude sometimes.
 
Chris, I'm going to put this simply.

You need to seek professional help. Feelings like these are not something you can ignore, even if they are intermittent.

Phone the number Naleena gave. Make an appointment to seek medical help. Do it, because seriously, fantasies like these are dangerous.

TC of yourself as well.
 
Dude...hang on in there....having no girls is not worth it for you to lose your life over....hummm maybe you wanna talk? You can PM me?
 
Chris 2 said:
I might go crazy one day and starting killing people, mostly white guy I can't stand. Things better change, my dark side is taking over me, and I don't know how long I can become sane or alive. I want to hang myself, run onto ongoing traffic, rape a girl so that I know what sex is like, go on a murder rampage, etc...

i think a mod should report this to the police before he actually does hurt someone. Give them his I.P address. This is serious honeysuckle he's saying and someone/ people are going to get hurt.

don't ignore the threats he has said moderators, this is SERIOUS
 
CHRIS I SEE MYSELF IN YOU. i used to be like you. i used to hate. i used to want to kill everyone in my high school because everyone was so jocklike and taking away my gf. my best friend was white and he hooked up with my ex who was also white in front of my face. what makes u think im not pissed? ive been messed by many friends, sometimes i wonder why the hell did things turn out this way? ive gone very violent. ive had dark plans as well. i was a pretty pronounced satanist for a while, what a fuckin big waste of time that was. but its not worth it at all trust me. you are in a good situation than i am.

GET A PUNCHING BAG, TAKE SOME MARTIAL ARTS. itll take a lot of the edge off trust me. martial art has changed me significantly mental wise. if u got a 100lb punching bag going, hit it couple times a day, work out a little big, pretend that the punching bag is the society, it will take off the edge.

TAKE SOME MARTIAL ART, TRANSFORM THE ANGER INTO SOMETHING USEFUL. i take jae kune do, its a great way to train and know how to hit the bags, it will take some edge off trust me. it worked wonders for me.

im supposed to have more anguish and suffering. my situation sucks right now, theres no way i could remedy my situation right now. YOU, CHRIS, STILL HAVE A CHANCE. YOU ARE IN A BOMBASS COLLEGE IN NORCAL, SUROUNDED BY STUDENTS AT ALL TIMES, LIVING IN DORMS, im fuckin jealous. ME? i got a eviction charge going. im 21, i live at home commute to my crazy art school which im bombard with massive projects. i dont even have free time to think about how im gonna get a gf. it sucks big time. YOU ON THE OTHER HAND, HAVE WAAY MORE CHANCES THAN ME, SO MAKE GOOD USE OF IT.

by the way, i trid to kill myself serveral times already. most of them are overdoses with drugs because i thought those are the best ways to go out. DONT FUCKIN DO IT, its not worth it. ive gone to a cliff and ready to jump down, but then i realized how beautiful the world really is. if u died, you are gona miss a lot of wonder feelings for years to come. the feelin of being a cool ass dad, you are gonna miss the girl u think that has a crush on u, and wonder wht the fuk wouldve happened? you are gonna miss a lot of things that are really beautiful and cant be bought with money in this world. you sure you are gonna miss out on those things? ONCE IN A FUCKIN LIFETIME EXPERIENCES????

i really do see myself in you chris, we share many common hatreds, but dont give up. fresia those people. ull become so much better than them if YOU DONT QUIT.
 
Yeah Chris, what Sigh said, I've been down that path as well.

Control it, don't let it control you man.
 
someone should delete this post before someone that goes to Chris' school finds out about this post... im paranoid. i dont want to get busted
 
[/color]
Hi. I am I-want-to-die
Which is the best way to die?
Or is there anyone willing to
Put me to sleep with needle?:(
 
want-to-die said:
[/color]
Hi. I am I-want-to-die
Which is the best way to die?
Or is there anyone willing to
Put me to sleep with needle?:(

dont say things like that, cheer up. things might get better :)
 
Whatever it is that's happening it's not going to be forever.
Things do change as they always do..life change all the time
as the 4 seasons.

A perminate salution to a temperory problem is not the answers.

mmmm perhapse your problems will died and you can still live.
 
Wow. I hadn't seen this thread, just heard about it.
Just...wow.
 
Dun kill yourself.

Life do change.Though people are always hard to deal with,but I believed that we can go through all these together.

Dun give up.
 
Wow... what a pompous arrogant ******* the OP is.

"white" "asian" "whatever". You can't get girls because your personality is honeysuckle. First of all wanting to date a "white girl" instead of any girl that you mesh well with is just effing tacky and shows how shallow you really are.
 
Papabear said:
Wow... what a pompous arrogant ******* the OP is.

"white" "asian" "whatever". You can't get girls because your personality is honeysuckle. First of all wanting to date a "white girl" instead of any girl that you mesh well with is just effing tacky and shows how shallow you really are.

I know, right?
NOT TO MENTION HE DISCUSSES KILLING AND RAPING.

aer3q0.gif
 
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