Instinct to Cheat...

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VanillaCreme

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I was talking to my guy last night, and he said, "Women instinctively cheat", "Women cheat more, men just get caught more"

I called him retarded. But, all of a sudden, he trusts his best friend enough for me to add him to AIM, which I guess, that trust wasn't there before. It took me a while, but I asked him why didn't he trust me. He said he "mostly" trusts me. I then asked what about me did he not trust. His reply: "Your vagina" That's when the quotes above ensued.

Discuss. I'm curious if others think this too.
 

Minus

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Nope

None of the numbers that i have seen, however worthless they may be, support the idea that females cheat more. The reasons are usually different but there is nothing to indicate that females cheat more.
 

Lonesome Crow

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mmmm...interesting. I couldn't tell you what numbers are.
It's not as if people send a postcard to inform someone everytime they
take a bite of the forbidden apple...;)

I know my finacee cheated on me.

I know my ex-wf cheated on me.

I know I hop into bed with 2 women that were best friends.

I know my all of my ex-gf (3) cheated on me.

I know the girl that took my virginity used to come over to my place
after she got married.
I know I also went out with her sister just to make it even more
exciting.

I know a another married woman got into bed with me..told me straight up. That's all she wanted from me.

I know just recently I've been talking to a married woman for the
past couple of months...She told me her husband was leaving the
other night.

I know another married woman..winks at me and flick her hair
everytime she see me.

I know everyone of these women enjoy sex as much as I do
and sometimes even more so.

A woman a couple of weeks ago...shared with me her
journal, workbook or dairy. It was pure honety from her
heart. She wanted to fix me :p
It was healing actaully. She wrote about everything.
Sex wasn't the all of it...but there was enough.
She cheated on her husband too.
I saw a lot of things within myself and within my ex-gf.

It was about the cake
The forbidden apple
Control issues
Fears
Trust
Escaping the pain
coping

Mind numbing fucking sex.....
 
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VanillaCreme

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Crow, all the women you knew were married, why did you go on with sleeping with them anyway? Doesn't their marriage tell you to back off at all?
 

Nyktimos

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I think people just notice what affects them most. To me, the question of whether women can be trusted and how you can tell those that can has cursed my life, because I don't need to be able to trust men to be faithful.

But a lot of the men I know consider it to be perfectly acceptable to be unfaithful if they know they won't get caught, but would consider it the greatest personal injury if their wives/girlfriends cheated. I don't know how that attitude is justified in their minds, but it is common.

I've certainly known a fair few women who have cheated, and more who have slept with people they know to be spoken for, but I think it is still more common in men.
 
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EveWasFramed

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I once heard that men are hard-wired to cheat - they just have to keep themselves in check. Sounds like horse shit, I know, and I'm not saying men cheat more than women. In fact, I'm not giving my opinion at all - just saying something that I'd heard. I believe this example was explained by saying that, thousands of years ago, men had built-in urges to procreate to perpetuate their line. Of course, that was thousands of years ago, and we are no longer a society of hunters/gatherers. So, before any men read this and say, "Oh yeah, we're just wired that way" let me just say please don't even try it. :p
Both sexes will cheat. It's a matter of motive and/or opportunity. Some can resist, others can't.
 

Scott

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When all is said and done, some people are just scum who either aren't strong enough to respect the commitments they have made, or just have no respect for other people's feelings and are unable to look beyond the next 3 minutes of their lives.

Whether men or women, I don't believe it is worth breaking it down into gender, it takes two to tango and I'm willing to bet the majority of people who the person cheats with knows that the other is cheating on a partner.

Loyalty is a very undervalued quality until it is too late.
 
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Caesium

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Don't trust anyone! All humans are filthy, dirty, cheating, lying scum! Humans must be eradicated from the face of the planet! They are an ugly scar on this planet that must be removed!
 

Lonesome Crow

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VanillaCreme said:
Crow, all the women you knew were married, why did you go on with sleeping with them anyway? Doesn't their marriage tell you to back off at all?

Dang Vanilla...

My finacee messed my best freind while I was sitting in class.
She told me she was drunk....will fuck me with a screwdriver.lol

I watched guys hitted up on ex-wf almost every other fucken
day. The curse of having a supermodel as your wife.
I was bound to make mistakes or get in an argument with her.
I remember asking her about our marriage vows.
Her words were " it went out the window " It's embeded in my mind.
Evidently the dickheads hitting up on my wife didn't give a rats
ass either.

After i sobered up...got into recovery.
My GF of 5 years cheated on me once in the earily part of the relationship.
We worked through that. So I thought.

My last GF of 12 year..will fuck ..it's like instant fucken replay.
Not in recovery...Not especailly ..when you sober up..you clean
your self up..you clean your life and it's a fucken GOD thing.
What possible lesson or good can come out of it?
becuase I'm a strong person ?....fuck me with a heart attack !!
She said she was drunk.....I've been drunk I know what's up.
She messed a freind of mine. My sponsee to be exact.
The closest people to me...the trust, the friendship...all of that.
Loyalty...if I talk to certain people..they said that i'm fucken
codependent. I'm sort of screwed in the head with this loyalty
and codependency shit.
I've been struggling very hard to come to terms...with this.
No releave..no healing..nothing gets resolved.
She won't talk to me..she won't face any of the problems.
She pretends that I'm dead.
She holding hands and singing cumba fucken ya with GOD.
Other AA members are hitting up on her...all the while saying
I have my head up my ass...

Why especifically married women ? At least I'm not doing
it in AA...Fucken progress not perfection...

What fucken moral standard or values must i live my life by ?
Other motherfuckers dosn't.
Labling them scums...dosn't remove the pains or resolves the issuses.

I know how to fuck up too.
I know how to not give a fuck either.

God dosn't give a fuck. She dosn't give a fuck. My freinds don't give a fuck.
Give me a fucken break..like somehow it's suppose to make be a stronger person.
Yes...I know the fucken pains and heartache of infidelity. Been on the receiving end of that shit...
Think of it like...fucken karma...I'm working out some karma...

I'm your next fucken karma...Play with me. :p

The universe will send you the lessons when you ask for it...Hot damn here I Am.
You ask for this..you wanted this to happen. You want me...you know you do..lol

A broken heart is an open heart....God is going to touch your heart with love and happiness.
I'm Michael the fucken angle. An instrument of god. The defender faith.
I ma break down that fucken wall and show you what real love is...lmao

Nobody back the fuck off when it was my marriage or my relationship.

I swear to you...If there's a god...
Please fucken help me. Remove these fucken pains from me...i can't fucken bare them anymore.
mmm...The less i care...the less pains i feel.

kippie yI A...if someone calls me name or look down on me or whatever the fuck ...it's fucken piontless ATM.

I think all women have sexual instinks..
Dose all married women or even single women look at me or notice me ?.....Hell no.
 

AimeeLou84

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I think women cheat as much as men do only the reasons are different. Men supposedly have more lust than women.Well I can say in my experience I have quite a high sex drive, more than my boyfriend anyway.So I wouldn't say women are less sexual than men. I think for men its all about looks. They are brought up with porn being the norm.Looking at naked bodies is accepted in guys but women don't spend the best part of their teen years looking at guys with their tops off or with their bits out.So straight away theres the difference that men lust after good looking women - is it instinct or is it learnt behaviour from looking at porn and having it the norm? Who knows.I do think its a rubbish excuse to blame it on instinct though.Even if you ahve the instinct it doesn't mean that you have to act on it.

For women its more emotional. It's about satisfying a need.Whether it be to feel sexy, to feel loved or to cheat emotionally by gaining a friendship and perhaps a trust that they don't have with their partner. For men it can also be an emotional thing,but most of the time it is purely about sex.For women its deeper than that. That's how I see it anyway.
 

Minus

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EveWasFramed said:
I once heard that men are hard-wired to cheat - they just have to keep themselves in check.

Sounds like the type of rationalizing that usually get said when he gets caught. "Hell after all i'm a guy and that is what we do."
 

Minus

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About 60 percent of men and 40 percent of women will have an affair at some point in some marriage

"Monogamy Myth" ~Peggy Vaugn

The numbers are suspect because you can find them as low as 22% male and 14% female and you can find them higher also. About the only thing that holds constant is that males always come out with a higher percentage.

A number of factors influence it. If emotional affairs are included or just physical affairs, sampling population, self reporting ...
 
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EveWasFramed

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Minus said:
EveWasFramed said:
I once heard that men are hard-wired to cheat - they just have to keep themselves in check.

Sounds like the type of rationalizing that usually get said when he gets caught. "Hell after all i'm a guy and that is what we do."

lol, hence me saying, "So, before any men read this and say, "Oh yeah, we're just wired that way" let me just say please don't even try it."
:p
 

Nyktimos

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Caesium said:
Don't trust anyone! All humans are filthy, dirty, cheating, lying scum!

True, but some of them have nice curvy bits and smell good.:shy:

Caesium said:
Humans must be eradicated from the face of the planet! They are an ugly scar on this planet that must be removed!

Even the curvy ones?:(
 
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VanillaCreme

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Nyktimos said:
Caesium said:
Don't trust anyone! All humans are filthy, dirty, cheating, lying scum!

True, but some of them have nice curvy bits and smell good.:shy:

Caesium said:
Humans must be eradicated from the face of the planet! They are an ugly scar on this planet that must be removed!

Even the curvy ones?:(

Lol. The curvy ones stay.
 

Lonesome Crow

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EveWasFramed said:
Minus said:
EveWasFramed said:
I once heard that men are hard-wired to cheat - they just have to keep themselves in check.

Sounds like the type of rationalizing that usually get said when he gets caught. "Hell after all i'm a guy and that is what we do."

lol, hence me saying, "So, before any men read this and say, "Oh yeah, we're just wired that way" let me just say please don't even try it."
:p

Oki doki...Is your sissy avaliable ? :p
 
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TheLonelySkeptic

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AimeeLou84 said:
I think women cheat as much as men do only the reasons are different. Men supposedly have more lust than women.Well I can say in my experience I have quite a high sex drive, more than my boyfriend anyway.So I wouldn't say women are less sexual than men. I think for men its all about looks. They are brought up with porn being the norm.Looking at naked bodies is accepted in guys but women don't spend the best part of their teen years looking at guys with their tops off or with their bits out.So straight away theres the difference that men lust after good looking women - is it instinct or is it learnt behaviour from looking at porn and having it the norm? Who knows.I do think its a rubbish excuse to blame it on instinct though.Even if you ahve the instinct it doesn't mean that you have to act on it.

For women its more emotional. It's about satisfying a need.Whether it be to feel sexy, to feel loved or to cheat emotionally by gaining a friendship and perhaps a trust that they don't have with their partner. For men it can also be an emotional thing,but most of the time it is purely about sex.For women its deeper than that. That's how I see it anyway.

So what you're basically saying is that a man cheats because he is a pig, whereas a woman cheats because the man she's with isn't up to par. I highly resent this.

A man cheats, he's a pig. A woman cheats, her man wasn't good enough. Fuck that.

t(-_-t)
 

Steel

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AimeeLou84 said:
I think women cheat as much as men do only the reasons are different. Men supposedly have more lust than women.Well I can say in my experience I have quite a high sex drive, more than my boyfriend anyway.So I wouldn't say women are less sexual than men. I think for men its all about looks. They are brought up with porn being the norm.Looking at naked bodies is accepted in guys but women don't spend the best part of their teen years looking at guys with their tops off or with their bits out.So straight away theres the difference that men lust after good looking women - is it instinct or is it learnt behaviour from looking at porn and having it the norm? Who knows.I do think its a rubbish excuse to blame it on instinct though.Even if you ahve the instinct it doesn't mean that you have to act on it.

For women its more emotional. It's about satisfying a need.Whether it be to feel sexy, to feel loved or to cheat emotionally by gaining a friendship and perhaps a trust that they don't have with their partner. For men it can also be an emotional thing,but most of the time it is purely about sex.For women its deeper than that. That's how I see it anyway.

Women look at porn too.

Some people cheat... its that simple. It doesn't matter the justification that they use... they know it's wrong.

Personally, I don't think there is any great difference between the sexes when it comes to cheating. Some people do, some don't.
 

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