Is letting go scary for everyone?

[CenotaphGirl]

Welcome back. I've been thinking about you and having positive thoughts.

I'm remembering back and I have always been glad to break up with the other person. I almost always feel relieved even if I still loved them. I typically give it my best shot. If it wasn't good enough then I'm done. There's no point continuing on.

Positive thoughts… about … me??? Awh thanks Finished, not sure its legal to have them though… I am a very negative Nancy after all I joke, totally missed ya.

It's seems normal, but then I'm an obsessive loser who still thinks about (and googles) women he hasn't spoken to in years, so my thoughts on this aren't balanced or healthy.

Letting go is difficult if you feel insecure and uncertain about finding someone in the future, maybe more so because you're in a stage of life where you're still finding out who you are and the end of a relationship is like saying goodbye to that part of life. That said a lot of people your age tend to go through partners like it's nothing, so I'm not sure.

Welcome back, glad you're okay.

Ardourrrr, please dont call yourself a loser, i’ll call the nice police on ya. Butttt Yeah I know what you mean, I hate my age group but then again I have nothing to do with most people my age

And thanks glad to be back

 

[4No1]

Maybe I'm wrong but I think it's not a letting you are afraid of but changes.
Most people are afraid of changes cause it's a way a brain works. So it's completely normal.
But to get smth new and better we have to go through tkhe changes, there is no other way.

 

[Finished]

...... and the end of a relationship is like saying goodbye to that part of life.

Yes, exactly like that. With my last girlfriend, 13 years ago, I actually said that to her as we broke up. I told her she was my last girlfriend. Women aren't interested in me. So, I have to make all the effort. If I don't then there's no chance for a girlfriend as proving over the last 13 years.

I spoke to her about a month after the breakup and she already had a new boyfriend. Maybe that's why she put so little effort into the relationship. She didn't have too. BTW, I was very nice to her the entire time even during the breakup. But after the breakup she treated me very rudely like I was some monster.

 

[TropicalStarfish]

Keep hangin' tough. Welcome back.

As for me, I've found, after a number of years go by, so much changes (and some things just keep stayin' the same, heh). You look back and think, 'wow, that was my silly little life, and it still is,' heh.

Take care, now, you.

 

[Francis]

'letting go' is S011, like quitting, which is why you use that word, since you're S011, the archetype of exhaustion. an S011 character is Ginn Weasly. On the topic of letting things go, take for reference the more positive archetype in your personality type: S111, who watches someone die and does nothing to help them (level 8), or they watch a relationship die (level 3) and do nothing about it. Meanwhile, your archetype, S011, contains 'beaten and tired', unemployability, goldbricking, unproductivity, inactivity, joblessness, idleness, sleep, snooze.

'being made to do things', having a master, ‘maturity’, waiting a long time, not being in charge, and domesticity<---those are S011 fetishes, like being beaten while being told not to complain.

heres a song with lyrcs that should resonate with you

 

[howdidifindmyselfhere?]

I'll have to agree with 4No1, in that it's change is the real monster hiding under the bed that must be faced here. We tend to get comfy with our current surroundings and while we would like things to change, it's the outcome of the change itself that scares us.

While I can't really speak of letting go, I can only imagine that grabbing hold is just as scary. Not only is opening up, putting myself out there and leaving myself vulnerable particularly to rejection, truly scary so is the thought of leaving what is familiar, warm and cosy to me.

I guest that it's a similar situation with you, in letting go you are leaving what is familiar, warm and cosy to you and it's the embarking on something new that is scary.

 

[The_Viking_King_56]

Yeah, change is always hard!
I've been treated like crap for 27 years by a cold hearted woman and still I can't imagine not having her in my life! WTF???

 

[user 135067]

It's about that time... so I will spear you all the details and get straight to the point.

I am out of hospital and on regular medication, I feel better however, relationship wise... I am in the gutter.

It's like a cross road, I usually always never allow my ex to move on long, I let him play house with someone just long enough,

Knowing he is mine has always been the one constant, regardless of the other women.

But this time it's different, this time... I want to let him go... So why do I keep finding myself feeling afraid to let go?

Is being afraid to let go normal?... idk... it's not because I don't love him, but it's because I do.

Anyway, I'm back, better, and ready to engage lightly, but not full on, so take it easy with old Ceno x

I don't know. It's not being afraid to let go with me. It's afraid to be alone. On my own. Maybe it's just afraid of change.

 

[Lonely girl 28]

I think it is because it can become your identity and your security. And it can be tough in a toxic relationship b/c the partner wants to drag the other down out of fear/insecurity they'll leave.

From exp, the best thing one can give themselves is letting go of a toxic relationship, though it can be rough in the moment.