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Thedogsservant

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Joined
Sep 30, 2022
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Location
North Yorkshire, UK
I was Googling & came across this site, & thought, why not have a look in? I'm in my 60s feel much younger in my head, but feel oh, so lonely. I'm a Carer for both my husband & my daughter, always trying to be one step ahead of any crisis. After so many years i'm worn out & wonder what happened to the life i'd hoped to have! I feel empty, disappointed & 'on my own'. If anybody feels similar it would be good to 'chat'..That's me!
 
I'm 69 now and was my mother's sole care giver for 17 years. This forum helped keep me sane, or close enough to sane anyway. She's been gone almost 4 years now.
I can't make things better for you, but your story resonates with me.

The line you write about feeling younger in your head than your chronological age seems like a positive, optimistic point. Take good care of yourself! Never overlook that! Look after your physical health as well as your mental and spiritual well being. Give yourself credit for the responsibilities your taking for your husband and daughter and never stop valuing yourself!
 
I can understand that being a carer for a long time can "grind" you down, and I think most people wondered what happened to the life they thought about when they were younger so you're definitely not alone in that!
 
I'm 69 now and was my mother's sole care giver for 17 years. This forum helped keep me sane, or close enough to sane anyway. She's been gone almost 4 years now.
I can't make things better for you, but your story resonates with me.

The line you write about feeling younger in your head than your chronological age seems like a positive, optimistic point. Take good care of yourself! Never overlook that! Look after your physical health as well as your mental and spiritual well being. Give yourself credit for the responsibilities your taking for your husband and daughter and never stop valuing yourself!
Thank you for your message. Much appreciated. I think things have come to a head now because my Mum died a month ago & it's made me take stock of my life, as it were.
 
I can understand that being a carer for a long time can "grind" you down, and I think most people wondered what happened to the life they thought about when they were younger so you're definitely not alone in that!
Thank you for the message. I often think that if i could 'turn my brain off' from thinking my life would be so much easier!!
 
Thank you for the message. I often think that if i could 'turn my brain off' from thinking my life would be so much easier!!
Yeah sometimes your brain can often run off with undesirable thoughts & worries. It sounds a bit like you need some "you" time to relax & switch off.
 
Welcome to the Forum. I was a caregiver for my mom, dad, and his parents for several years. My plan was to never have children. But, I ended up having adults that needed their butts wiped, etc, etc, etc. It changed me. It took a big part of my life force away. I do not know how someone can do it for years and years. I admire you for doing it.
 
I'm sorry for your circumstances. I was a carer for my dad for a number of years. It was kind of like taking care of an adult child and keeping them calm.
 
I got my first taste of being a caregiver just 2 months ago during a visit with my 94 year old Dad. We both caught Covid, he took a bad fall, and I was the only one around when he suddenly lost most of his physical and cognitive abilities. I couldn't believe the daily and nightly issues we shared and the gross things I had to do dealing with both hygiene and major wound care. It consumed me for nearly 3 weeks before he died. I know there's no way I could have endured that demanding situation for much longer, and it's given me extreme respect for those that do.

I think your profile name could more appropriately be TheGodServant. The best encouragement I could offer to any caretaker is to focus on the added importance of being a saved Christian. Why's that? Because if you're not, the time sacrificed to others ultimately ends only with a deprived life. But if you are, such love and sacrifice will be hugely rewarded in heaven.
 
I was Googling & came across this site, & thought, why not have a look in? I'm in my 60s feel much younger in my head, but feel oh, so lonely. I'm a Carer for both my husband & my daughter, always trying to be one step ahead of any crisis. After so many years i'm worn out & wonder what happened to the life i'd hoped to have! I feel empty, disappointed & 'on my own'. If anybody feels similar it would be good to 'chat'..That's me!
Hello and Welcome! I hope you enjoy your time on here. :)
There are always plenty of people who'd love to talk with you.
 

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