Hi,
It’s been a long time since i first posted here. In the time being there has been zero improvement in my loneliness. I’ve been a silent guy my whole life. Introvert, but also a caring person. I know from myself i’m the kind of guy who is ready to help someone any time of the day. I had a few friends in school, but it seemed that with the years passing these people where not really excited in being friends with me. Like i said i am ready to help anyone, but with time passing i got the feeling that the so called friends actually where abusing my kindness to help them. So i throttled the kindness a bit down and like i thought, the “friends” stayed away. That was the moment the loneliness started hitting. What a horrible feeling it is, to realize you are being used only to profit other people. Current day i have a job where i’m absolutely good at and colleagues i talk to at work. But that’s about it. Since school which was already ten years ago (28y old now) i had zero friends. Nobody to talk to. Nobody to hang out with. Nobody that wishes a happy birthday, and nobody to spend NY eve with. Actually nobody to do anything with, and that hurts alot. If i go out on my own it is heartbreaking to see other people enjoy their lives with friends. I really hope my life will change in the future, but i have the feeling i will always be the outcast that’s gonna spend his days in loneliness and that’s heartbreaking to me. I would love to have a girlfriend at my side to enjoy life with and friends with we could have fun with. It brings tears to my eyes to think about never having these. Glad i could write my thoughts and feelings down. That actually gives me a relieving feeling.
It’s been a long time since i first posted here. In the time being there has been zero improvement in my loneliness. I’ve been a silent guy my whole life. Introvert, but also a caring person. I know from myself i’m the kind of guy who is ready to help someone any time of the day. I had a few friends in school, but it seemed that with the years passing these people where not really excited in being friends with me. Like i said i am ready to help anyone, but with time passing i got the feeling that the so called friends actually where abusing my kindness to help them. So i throttled the kindness a bit down and like i thought, the “friends” stayed away. That was the moment the loneliness started hitting. What a horrible feeling it is, to realize you are being used only to profit other people. Current day i have a job where i’m absolutely good at and colleagues i talk to at work. But that’s about it. Since school which was already ten years ago (28y old now) i had zero friends. Nobody to talk to. Nobody to hang out with. Nobody that wishes a happy birthday, and nobody to spend NY eve with. Actually nobody to do anything with, and that hurts alot. If i go out on my own it is heartbreaking to see other people enjoy their lives with friends. I really hope my life will change in the future, but i have the feeling i will always be the outcast that’s gonna spend his days in loneliness and that’s heartbreaking to me. I would love to have a girlfriend at my side to enjoy life with and friends with we could have fun with. It brings tears to my eyes to think about never having these. Glad i could write my thoughts and feelings down. That actually gives me a relieving feeling.