My birthday in 3 days..

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Roxiee

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So, I'm afraid. I'm obviously going out for dinner with my guy best friend but I'm not great in social area. I haven't been out since I was forced to by the ambulance and police so I really don't want to but he's paying for me and he said that I can't say no because It's a learning step tor me and most people celebrate their birthday. But I'm not like them. I'm just not wanting to go but I don't want to loose him . Ugh
 

TheRealCallie

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Staying in and doing nothing will only make you worse. Get out and have a good time. The longer you hold on to your negative feelings, the longer you will stay in your current mindset. Try to think of the positive **** that will come from getting out. And don't say there isn't any, because there always is.

Whether you believe it or not, it is entirely your choice on how you want to live your life and if you want to be like you are now or not.
 

Roxiee

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If only y'all knew why I'm terrified about going out. But you wouldn't understand
 

Roxiee

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How do you know? I used to be terrified of leaving my house too. I'd have a massive panic attack just thinking about it.
I was just saying jesus... because there's a reason why I'm scared to especially with a male friend. The last time I went out and felt 'safe' which turned out to be horrid. I got zexually asesulted ( he's locked up, but I'm still scared ) thats why
 

Forgottendanfan

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As a former agorophobe myself, I totally understand your struggle. Unfortunately, the only way you're likely to overcome your fear of going out, is to face it. If course, if you don't feel ready to do this yet, your friend should understand. There's never an ideal time though, and the longer you leave it, the harder it's likely to become.
 

Roxiee

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As a former agorophobe myself, I totally understand your struggle. Unfortunately, the only way you're likely to overcome your fear of going out, is to face it. If course, if you don't feel ready to do this yet, your friend should understand. There's never an ideal time though, and the longer you leave it, the harder it's likely to become.
I'm going to try, like you said the only way to get over this is to face it. I will struggle but it's the best thing to do, thank you.
 

TheRealCallie

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I was just saying jesus... because there's a reason why I'm scared to especially with a male friend. The last time I went out and felt 'safe' which turned out to be horrid. I got zexually asesulted ( he's locked up, but I'm still scared ) thats why
Was that guy also your friend? Did you know him for a long time or was it a new friendship? If this guy is you "best" guy friend, I would assume he wouldn't do something like that, especially if you've known him for a while. Do you have any other friends you could invite to go along as a buffer and more security? Also, self defense classes would be a big boost to your confidence and mental well being...knowing you can take care of yourself in the event that you have to is always a good thing.

Also, I wasn't being a ***** when I said that. Especially here, a lot of people likely are going to understand or even have been through it before.
 

Roxiee

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Was that guy also your friend? Did you know him for a long time or was it a new friendship? If this guy is you "best" guy friend, I would assume he wouldn't do something like that, especially if you've known him for a while. Do you have any other friends you could invite to go along as a buffer and more security? Also, self defense classes would be a big boost to your confidence and mental well being...knowing you can take care of yourself in the event that you have to is always a good thing.

Also, I wasn't being a ***** when I said that. Especially here, a lot of people likely are going to understand or even have been through it before.
I didn't mean you was being a *****! I was just apologising how I came across!
The guy who did that before I had met on tinder. Which now I WILL not ever use again. I will ask my auntie if she can come with me
 

Roxiee

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Trying to think of people who wants a free meal, it's so hard.. Ah! My brother !! I bloody hope he's not busy
 

LeeG

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@Roxiee happy birthday to you. I would say don't cancel the dinner, it is your birthday so spend it with a friend. If he's your real friend he shouldn't try anything like that. If you can't find anyone to go along with you and you are worried about don't be alone with him, meet him at the restaurant and then leave there alone, if you don't drive do Uber or a cab, just tell him you are busy and would prefer to meet.
 

Roxiee

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@Roxiee happy birthday to you. I would say don't cancel the dinner, it is your birthday so spend it with a friend. If he's your real friend he shouldn't try anything like that. If you can't find anyone to go along with you and you are worried about don't be alone with him, meet him at the restaurant and then leave there alone, if you don't drive do Uber or a cab, just tell him you are busy and would prefer to meet.
Thank you, Lee! Means a lot thank you foe your advice lovely 🥰
 

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