Need serious girlfriend help.

[River Lion]

I want a girlfriend very badly. This may seem like a long post, but please, I need help. I have no one else to turn to, so I must seek help on an internet forum. I've been in this rut for long enough.

19, male, hetero,
Entering 2nd yr of university in September.
Need serious help.

I'm going to keep this really short and concise. Don't want to go into detail so this turns into a long-winded
textwall.


- I am 19 and have no friends. Never flirted/dated/kissed/hugged a girl.

- I am confused. Confused in the sense that I don't even know if I want friends, or just can't get them. I don't struggle to talk to people...I am not Sheldon from BBT. I can sustain a conversation, I guess.

- I have examined myself within and still see that I have no interest in making friends. That includes male "buddies", like the John Jim and Jack guys that you can play a video game with or do this and that.

- I do want a girlfriend, however.

- I am socially disconnected. I don't watch dramas like The OC or 90210 and have no idea what is socially acceptable.

- I have no freaking clue on how to go about getting a girlfriend. I've browsed the internet, but all guides are void to me:

They say "use your friends to introduce you to a girl. Mutual friends are a good way to date”
> Can’t do that, got no friends.

Go to bars/clubs/whatever and pick up girls there.
> No, I don’t want some hedonistic, partying, shot-taking bimbo. Not to insult guys who do, but that's just my personal preference. Also, I hear going to clubs alone is socially unacceptable so I can't go anyway.

Talk to girls in your dorm
> I commute to school, I do not live on residence.


Join clubs and meet girls there
> The 1st school year ended and I didn't do much in way of clubs, but I am an executive on a club for the 2014-2015 year and will try this out.

Please do not suggest:

“You’ll have to work your way up. Make a good circle of guy friends, then get them to introduce you to girls they know in their network. Sisters, female friends, dorm buddies, whatever.”
> It could take a year or more for me to establish a good network of 3-4 guy friends. Can’t do that. I want to jump straight into the girlfriend part.





I am setting out on quest to get a girlfriend. I want to prove that I can do it, against all odds.


Case Study:

To better help you folks help me, I’ve decided that instead of you giving me general tips you can give me tips that apply to an actual real life scenario.

I have been infatuated with this girl ever since I first saw her.

She is in a Tuesday lecture of mine. I would arrive at 3:00 and take a seat. She would arrive a few minutes later and sit there with all her friends surrounding her down the row.

All the time I spent with her was staring at the back of her beautiful blonde mop.

This is the only time I saw her. That’s it. I wouldn’t even see her in hallways on occasion because the school is massive. I was in no common clubs with her, and although she lives on campus I do not.

Let’s say I wanted to date this girl. What could I have done? What is the socially acceptable process?

 

[Nicolelt]

Have you ever talked to this girl? Sometimes you just have to take a deep breathe and go for it. There's a way to start.

 

[Badjedidude]

It could take a year or more for me to establish a good network of 3-4 guy friends. Can’t do that. I want to jump straight into the girlfriend part.

Probably not gonna happen. Sorry, but it's the truth.

I have been infatuated with this girl ever since I first saw her.

You're putting the pussy on a pedestal, man.

Don't put the pussy on a pedestal.

Joking aside... It's OK to have a crush on someone, but... let me put it this way: As you have no experience dating, a more varied approach is going to benefit you more in the long run. Seriously. Fixating upon one woman when you haven't had much experience with women in general just isn't a great idea.

Maybe that sounds harsh, but it's the truth. You need to meet lots of women and engage with them on a lot of different levels. Isolating one and obsessing over her will benefit neither her nor you. Another good reason to take this approach is that rejection isn't such a big deal, as you don't have everything invested in one woman's response -- especially if you've never talked to that woman before, yet have already built her up into some sort of distant fantasy girlfriend in your mind.

Nothing hurts more than being emotionally invested in someone who doesn't even know you exist.

I will mention that it may be considered slightly creepy that you've actually memorized where this girl sits -- to the point that you can draw a seating chart to illustrate it. Have you ever even talked to the girl? Said hello? Anything?

Let’s say I wanted to date this girl. What could I have done? What is the socially acceptable process?

Walk up to her and ask her for coffee. It's simple, direct, and honest. And if you get rejected, move on. Find another girl.

My honest advice is for you to directly approach this girl and ask if she wants to hang out. If not, take it in stride and find another girl to talk to/ask out.

 

[Batman55]

Please do not suggest:

“You’ll have to work your way up. Make a good circle of guy friends, then get them to introduce you to girls they know in their network. Sisters, female friends, dorm buddies, whatever.”

I'm in the same boat as you, just a bit older.

And I totally agree with that advice being lousy (no offense to those here who would suggest it or have suggested it.) It's lousy to me (and to the OP) because we just don't see life from a social/group oriented perspective, and it's not fully our fault, it is somehow innate.

Folks like us are looking for ways to do things on a more individual level, if that can be done. That's the advice we're looking for.

 

[Mr.YellowCat]

,,Hey. I wanted to ask you, would you go out for a cup of coffee with me sometimes?"
As harsh as it sounds, its swing and a miss (I´m not sure how people say this thing, have I used the correct form?). One of the gentlemen above me said it well.
And if you are afraid about being turned down, everyone does, and everyone is turned down from time to time. No point of not doing something because you are afraid. If you want the girl to respect you as a man, you have to act like one, and thou, overcoming your fears.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Go to bars/clubs/whatever and pick up girls there.
> No, I don’t want some hedonistic, partying, shot-taking bimbo. Not to insult guys who do, but that's just my personal preference. Also, I hear going to clubs alone is socially unacceptable so I can't go anyway.

Not every girl that goes to clubs/bars are "hedonistic, partying, shot-taking bimbos." Don't judge people on what they do on the weekends (unless it's something really bad), that will limit you a lot.

Talk to girls in your dorm
> I commute to school, I do not live on residence.

Just because you don't live on campus doesn't mean you can talk to people on campus. Start up some conversations with people or simply just say hello and see where it takes you.

Join clubs and meet girls there
> The 1st school year ended and I didn't do much in way of clubs, but I am an executive on a club for the 2014-2015 year and will try this out.

Excellent idea. Find clubs that interest you and join them. It doesn't even have to be a school club. You could volunteer or join a fitness group or something like that in the community.

“You’ll have to work your way up. Make a good circle of guy friends, then get them to introduce you to girls they know in their network. Sisters, female friends, dorm buddies, whatever.”
> It could take a year or more for me to establish a good network of 3-4 guy friends. Can’t do that. I want to jump straight into the girlfriend part.
I am setting out on quest to get a girlfriend. I want to prove that I can do it, against all odds.

It doesn't have to take a year or more, however, you shouldn't ONLY be trying to get a girlfriend. If you don't have anyone else in your life, you will most likely stifle whatever girlfriend you are able to get, because you will have no outlet other than her.

It's only "against all odds" if you think it is. Meeting girls and finding a girlfriend is never against all odds. It's also about how you perceive yourself. What you feel about yourself will reflect in your actions and attitude.

Accept yourself for who you are and don't be too down on yourself. Accept your situation and own who and what you are. You can't really expect anyone to like you if you don't like yourself. I'm not saying you have to love yourself, not by any means, but you can't hate yourself either.

 

[Nightwing]

Have you ever talked to this girl? Sometimes you just have to take a deep breathe and go for it. There's a way to start.

This. Bad idea to get infatuated on looks alone... you could talk to her and discover she is a "hedonistic, partying, shot-taking bimbo" as you put it.

In addition, most women these days have gone through that stage of their lives while they were young. (Some go on with it longer than others.) You've just written off at least 80% of the female population.

From what you say... you seem to be pleased about being anti-social... but you dislike the fact that being anti-social makes it harder to meet a girl you could have a relationship with. So effectively, the only type of woman who will satisfy you, has to be equally anti-social. No easy way about it - she's going to be hard to find. (because she's anti-social.) I'd say you would probably do better to think about what few things an anti-social girl might do... beyond that, I can't really think of a way to be more helpful *shrugs*

 

[murmi97]

You're putting the pussy on a pedestal, man.

Don't put the pussy on a pedestal.

Ha ha yeah, don't put your food on the table unless you're about to (hopefully consensually) eat it.

 

[River Lion]

I would like to give everyone a sincere thank you for your responses. They are all varied and provide some great tips. Keep em coming.

Probably not gonna happen. Sorry, but it's the truth.

I don't understand what you mean. Are you saying it is impossible to get a girlfriend while having no friends?

Joking aside... It's OK to have a crush on someone, but... let me put it this way: As you have no experience dating, a more varied approach is going to benefit you more in the long run. Seriously. Fixating upon one woman when you haven't had much experience with women in general just isn't a great idea.

Maybe that sounds harsh, but it's the truth. You need to meet lots of women and engage with them on a lot of different levels. Isolating one and obsessing over her will benefit neither her nor you. Another good reason to take this approach is that rejection isn't such a big deal, as you don't have everything invested in one woman's response -- especially if you've never talked to that woman before, yet have already built her up into some sort of distant fantasy girlfriend in your mind.

Nothing hurts more than being emotionally invested in someone who doesn't even know you exist.

I will mention that it may be considered slightly creepy that you've actually memorized where this girl sits -- to the point that you can draw a seating chart to illustrate it.

I do agree that this is very valid advice. I've invested a lot of emotional energy daydreaming about her, and I shouldn't put all my berries in one basket because it may turn out that basket doesn't like me or already has a boyfriend.

Have you ever even talked to the girl? Said hello? Anything?

Walk up to her and ask her for coffee. It's simple, direct, and honest. And if you get rejected, move on. Find another girl.

My honest advice is for you to directly approach this girl and ask if she wants to hang out. If not, take it in stride and find another girl to talk to/ask out.

You're not the only one in the thread that has said "just go talk to her"

I don't mean to sound smarmy or rancorous when I say this...but I have no idea whatsoever on how to implement this bit of advice. I really don't understand what you mean when you say "ask her for coffee"

As I mentioned in the opening post, the only times I saw her were during lecture. I would get to lecture at 3:00 and she would arrive a few minutes after.

She'd take a seat in the middle of 2nd row, surrounded by all her friends (6-7 of them) in the adjacent seats.

My understanding of socially acceptable flirting practices is limited, but even a novice like me knows that it would have been incredibly awkward to just walk up to her row in the middle of lecture and try to talk to her. I could be wrong, though. Correct me if I am.

So, I respectfully ask that you elaborate. What context would I ask her out in, or "approach her directly".

---

From what you say... you seem to be pleased about being anti-social... but you dislike the fact that being anti-social makes it harder to meet a girl you could have a relationship with. So effectively, the only type of woman who will satisfy you, has to be equally anti-social. No easy way about it - she's going to be hard to find. (because she's anti-social.) I'd say you would probably do better to think about what few things an anti-social girl might do... beyond that, I can't really think of a way to be more helpful *shrugs*

I'm not pleased about being anti-social, I am just accepting and happy with the fact that I have no genuine interest in forming social relationships. i.e "Drinking buddies" or "gamer bros" or whatever.

I am interested in forming an intimate/romantic relationship with a woman, however.

So I disagree when you say the only type of woman who will be compatible with me must be as anti-social as I am. I wouldn't mind a girl who has a strong network of friends and a social life.

It doesn't have to take a year or more, however, you shouldn't ONLY be trying to get a girlfriend. If you don't have anyone else in your life, you will most likely stifle whatever girlfriend you are able to get, because you will have no outlet other than her.

I don't think that'll be a problem. I have enough self-control and won't suffocate her, at all.

As of right now, I'm directing all my focus and attention on getting a girlfriend. I will focus on any drama/aftermath that stems as a result of the relationship later on. I'm doing this so my goals and objectives are more manageable, like focusing solely on getting a building complex constructed, and then deciding which companies will set up office in it much later.

 

[Veruca]

Hey River Lion,

I can understand that approaching one's crush can be a very intimidating thing, but don't give up yet. Even if things don't workout (she could be taken, not that interesting to you once you get to know her etc), at least you can pat yourself on your back for having taken the leap!

Ok, it looks like trying to approach this girl in class might be really difficult seeing that she's surrounded by her friends. So my suggestion would be to try and find a time when she's alone. Perhaps she has other classes? Maybe you can catch her while she's walking to class or to her car? And then maybe you can start up a casual conversation. Like if you're walking to class together, you could ask her a question about something pertaining to class. Something relating to homework, like "Hey you're in my ___ class right? Were you able to answer question....?" If she responds well (answers your question, makes some eye contact, perhaps smiles) then maybe you can introduce yourself and ask her for her opinion of the class, etc. Its small talk, but at the same time, its also a way for you to get to know her, and to make her feel like she's interesting.

However, if she responds to your first question by appearing distant and uninterested. Not making any eye contact. Rushing away...looking away etc, then the best thing to do would be to let her go. If you really wanted to pursue her despite this, then you may have to find other ways to engage her. You can try chatting her up again in a similar fashion but if she responds the same way again then I don't think its going to anywhere

If things don't work out with your crush, then please don't be discouraged. Your plan to join clubs etc is good. Maybe add charitable events/sports stuff/part time job to the list too. All are good ways to meet people.

And I think the best way to get a girlfriend, is actually to make friends with girls first. Even if nothing happens with the girls you're friends with, at least you can meet other girls through them.

Hope this helps. Good luck!

 

[EveWasFramed]

I will focus on any drama/aftermath that stems as a result of the relationship later on.

I almost pity the person you set your cap for. I'm sorry (in advance) if that hurts your feelings, but your attitude about the entire thing reeks of complete selfishness. You speak of what you want and who you want and want to know how you can get what it is that you desire.
God (or whatever deity you do or don't worship) help you if you manage to actually get a girlfriend and she discovers your thought process never once included "what do I have to offer that special someone in my life." Or, "what do I bring to the table for someone else?" Or " would I make a good partner and are we compatible and do I value anything other than the way she looks and the fact that I will "have a girlfriend?"
Seriously? You need to rethink things in my opinion.
It's perfectly acceptable to want a significant other in your life, but that person should NOT be some sort of "mission." And while I do understand that it's much more difficult for some people to approach others, I'd have to say that your approach will be the LEAST of your issues, if I'm being honest.
And what about when you GET the girl? How will you KEEP her? You don't appear to be giving the "drama/aftermath" as you call it, much thought. That is SERIOUSLY shortsighted.
And the fact that you consider what comes after as drama and aftermath leads me to question if you're even ready or capable of having a healthy relationship at this time in your life.

Again, my apologies if any of this offends, but I felt the need to point out the obvious.
I do wish you the best of luck however, as it does seem that you genuinely long for companionship.

 

[jaguarundi]

^That. I was considering something along the same lines myself.

Basically the OP wants a girlfriend with the snap of his fingers, without wanting to do any work for it and not wanting to make or keep friends. The word is girlFRIEND - bit of a clue in there, wouldn't we say?

Mostly what I think the OP and guys like him want is a clone of themselves, with lady parts. They have nil idea of what a relationship means in terms or work, compromise and respect for another person.

 

[EveWasFramed]

^That. I was considering something along the same lines myself.

Basically the OP wants a girlfriend with the snap of his fingers, without wanting to do any work for it and not wanting to make or keep friends. The word is girlFRIEND - bit of a clue in there, wouldn't we say?

Mostly what I think the OP and guys like him want is a clone of themselves, with lady parts. They have nil idea of what a relationship means in terms or work, compromise and respect for another person.

My thoughts as well. GOOD relationship require a lot of work. It's been my own personal experience that, the more effort you put forth, the greater and more meaningful the result will be.

 

[murmi97]

I don't know about all this "snap of his fingers", "clone of himself with lady parts", "reeks of complete selfishness" stuff. Sounds like he just wants to court a woman. I may think the best way to start is through some platonic way like friendship, but that doesn't mean what he wants won't work or turn out to be a healthy, happy relationship.

I get what was said about the not making it a mission though. Most can sense that attitude and won't feel very comfortable with it. I mean it's really about connecting with a person. That shouldn't be a stressful thing, it should feel easy for both.

 

[River Lion]

Ok, it looks like trying to approach this girl in class might be really difficult seeing that she's surrounded by her friends. So my suggestion would be to try and find a time when she's alone. Perhaps she has other classes? Maybe you can catch her while she's walking to class or to her car? And then maybe you can start up a casual conversation. Like if you're walking to class together, you could ask her a question about something pertaining to class. Something relating to homework, like "Hey you're in my ___ class right? Were you able to answer question....?" If she responds well (answers your question, makes some eye contact, perhaps smiles) then maybe you can introduce yourself and ask her for her opinion of the class, etc. Its small talk, but at the same time, its also a way for you to get to know her, and to make her feel like she's interesting.

Thank you. This was the type of answer I was looking for. Something that clearly and blatantly spells out the contexts in which I could talk to this woman and what would be the acceptable topics to talk about, instead of just saying "talk to her".
Like I said, I knew that talking to her in the lecture hall would have been next to impossible. I need to form a list of the socially acceptable contexts in which talking to women with flirtatious intent is okay. On trains, in halls, in shops, etc.

However, if she responds to your first question by appearing distant and uninterested. Not making any eye contact. Rushing away...looking away etc, then the best thing to do would be to let her go. If you really wanted to pursue her despite this, then you may have to find other ways to engage her. You can try chatting her up again in a similar fashion but if she responds the same way again then I don't think its going to anywhere

And yes, I may be infatuated but I am not irrational. If this girl shows no interest in me, then so be it. There are others.

The school year has ended. I won't see her for the summer, but I can only pray that she and I have a common class in September. And take things from there.
I will follow the outlines of your idea. Find places where she is alone, and approach with acceptable conversation choices. Like "that concept in Chp 6 sure is confusing isn't it?"
Then use what little skills I have to sustain a small conversation. And withdraw. I want to withdraw within a few moments of the conversation.

I would try to repeat that process again. Find her in a situation where she is alone, initiate small talk, but instead of withdrawing, at the end I will ask her for coffee.

So the plan is:

1) Find her alone
2) Initiate small talk about class
3) Withdraw

4) Repeat steps 1-3 a few days later
5) Ask her for coffee this time


So I've gauged that 2 sessions of small talk are appropriate. On the 2nd one, I will pop the coffee question at the end.

What do you think of this plan? Should I have more talks with her before asking?

---

I almost pity the person you set your cap for. I'm sorry (in advance) if that hurts your feelings, but your attitude about the entire thing reeks of complete selfishness. You speak of what you want and who you want and want to know how you can get what it is that you desire.
God (or whatever deity you do or don't worship) help you if you manage to actually get a girlfriend and she discovers your thought process never once included "what do I have to offer that special someone in my life." Or, "what do I bring to the table for someone else?" Or " would I make a good partner and are we compatible and do I value anything other than the way she looks and the fact that I will "have a girlfriend?"
Seriously? You need to rethink things in my opinion.
It's perfectly acceptable to want a significant other in your life, but that person should NOT be some sort of "mission." And while I do understand that it's much more difficult for some people to approach others, I'd have to say that your approach will be the LEAST of your issues, if I'm being honest.
And what about when you GET the girl? How will you KEEP her? You don't appear to be giving the "drama/aftermath" as you call it, much thought. That is SERIOUSLY shortsighted.
And the fact that you consider what comes after as drama and aftermath leads me to question if you're even ready or capable of having a healthy relationship at this time in your life.

Again, my apologies if any of this offends, but I felt the need to point out the obvious.
I do wish you the best of luck however, as it does seem that you genuinely long for companionship.

I sincerely apologize if I came across like that. That's not what I meant. My poor English skills may have made me choose the wrong wording and totally butcher what I actually meant to convey.

I don't want this to be "get a girlfriend and woohoo neglect everything else". Not at all.
I am simply saying, for the most part, that my focus is currently on the obtainment part and not the maintenance part just so I don't overwhelm myself at this point in time.
I will absolutely make myself a good person and respect the other member in the relationship. I'm developing my character and personality every day, making myself a beast-like entity, trying to mold myself into someone who is interesting to be around.
But I am not neglecting or keeping this part of the table. I am simply breaking down this journey into small, manageable, segments. And it just so happens the actual sustainability of the relationship is a segment I have not addressed yet.

I can't even begin to express how wrong jaguarundi is.

I will sure as hell pour every ounce of effort I can into sustaining the relationship.

Basically the OP wants a girlfriend with the snap of his fingers, without wanting to do any work for it

Who told you I don't want to do any work for it? What possibly gave you that idea?

 

[EveWasFramed]

I sincerely apologize if I came across like that. That's not what I meant. My poor English skills may have made me choose the wrong wording and totally butcher what I actually meant to convey.

I don't want this to be "get a girlfriend and woohoo neglect everything else". Not at all.
I am simply saying, for the most part, that my focus is currently on the obtainment part and not the maintenance part just so I don't overwhelm myself at this point in time.
I will absolutely make myself a good person and respect the other member in the relationship. I'm developing my character and personality every day, making myself a beast-like entity, trying to mold myself into someone who is interesting to be around.
But I am not neglecting or keeping this part of the table. I am simply breaking down this journey into small, manageable, segments. And it just so happens the actual sustainability of the relationship is a segment I have not addressed yet.

I can't even begin to express how wrong jaguarundi is.

I will sure as hell pour every ounce of effort I can into sustaining the relationship.

Im glad you weren't offended by what I said - I sincerely wasn't trying to make you feel bad.
What you're saying here makes things a bit clearer.

As for where Jag got her idea, it was likely from the same place I got mine. You're right - sometimes syntax can make all the difference.

I hope that you will indeed take some of the advice offered and run with it. I'm also glad to see that you realize that obtaining (and maintaining) a good relationship requires a lot of effort from both parties.
The rewards can be very fulfilling. I wish you much luck!

 

[River Lion]

Im glad you weren't offended by what I said - I sincerely wasn't trying to make you feel bad.

I've adopted a persona of extreme stoicism and thus appointed myself to an offense-free lifestyle. It's truly very difficult to offend me.

As for where Jag got her idea, it was likely from the same place I got mine. You're right - sometimes syntax can make all the difference.

Haha, I still don't know where you got your idea from (like which post, sentence, etc.) but whatevs. We've cleared things up so I guess we can get back to the initial inquiries.

I've formulated my plan and will execute it come September of this year. I just need a seal of approval on that plan, which I will obtain through various sources.

 

[Veruca]

Glad that helped. Yeah, coming up with a list is a good idea.

But, I think instead of definitely planning to withdraw, better to wing it based on how she responds. If she seems interested in carrying on a conversation, then it might give her the wrong message to cut it short abruptly. If you get nervous though, you can always pretend that you have to go somewhere and tell her that it was nice talking to her...see her in class etc...bye....

But my advice would be to avoid asking her out for coffee so soon aka 2nd time speaking to her. You don't know what type of person she is yet...if she's shy and reserved, asking her out for coffee might scare her.

While I understand and appreciate the need for romantic companionship, I do think what might really help you in the long run, is to not focus too much on looking for a girlfriend or asking this particular girl out on a date immediately. For a relationship to work, you need to know one another first. Almost always better to start off as friends. At least in my humble opinion, it is

Most girls want to be respected and treated like they are more than just sexual or romantic pursuits, so asking a girl out on a date too soon may not have the desired effect. It could turn her off. She might think that you're only interested in her physical appearance because you don't know her as a person. Its so much better for you to get to know her, and vice versa before making a move. You may even discover that you're better off friends than partners.

I think this is what Eve and Jag meant too.

So maybe try and become her friend first? Good luck!

 

[River Lion]

Glad that helped. Yeah, coming up with a list is a good idea.

But, I think instead of definitely planning to withdraw, better to wing it based on how she responds. If she seems interested in carrying on a conversation, then it might give her the wrong message to cut it short abruptly. If you get nervous though, you can always pretend that you have to go somewhere and tell her that it was nice talking to her...see her in class etc...bye....

But my advice would be to avoid asking her out for coffee so soon aka 2nd time speaking to her. You don't know what type of person she is yet...if she's shy and reserved, asking her out for coffee might scare her.

While I understand and appreciate the need for romantic companionship, I do think what might really help you in the long run, is to not focus too much on looking for a girlfriend or asking this particular girl out on a date immediately. For a relationship to work, you need to know one another first. Almost always better to start off as friends. At least in my humble opinion, it is

Most girls want to be respected and treated like they are more than just sexual or romantic pursuits, so asking a girl out on a date too soon may not have the desired effect. It could turn her off. She might think that you're only interested in her physical appearance because you don't know her as a person. Its so much better for you to get to know her, and vice versa before making a move. You may even discover that you're better off friends than partners.

I think this is what Eve and Jag meant too.

So maybe try and become her friend first? Good luck!

If not two, then how many encounters would you suggest before asking her out?

> So maybe try and become her friend first?

I don't mind doing that. I just have to do a few weeks of research into how to make friends. What exactly constitutes a "friend" and what the defintion of a "friend" is nowadays. And most importantly how to make a friend.
Friend/girlfriend. It'd all be the same to me, I guess. She'd be my first ever friend in 7/8 years. So it'd be an interesting enough of a social exploration to slake my thirsts for having female company, and then I'll pursue the girlfriend route.

My understanding of the main difference between a girlfriend and a female friend is (in a very simple bare-bones way) is that you have a sexual relationship with the latter. Both can provide rapport, companionship, advice, and a pretty face to gaze at.
I think I'm just rambling now. Oh well. Gotta go scour the vast expanses of the internet and try to find out how to make friends.

 

[jaguarundi]

^Indeed.

Saying you have no interest in having any friends, don't want to wait while you form other friendships but want a girlfriend right now did rather give the impression that you just want that one girl to drop into your lap.

I repeat - the word girlfriend has meaning. Also, from my own experience of many years living with a guy who did not want other friends, the burden of having such a partner withered my own friendships, made me practically his sole emotional and social support, and thus placed a crushing burden on me because I loved him.

Living with someone who has no interest in friendships or a social life is utterly soul destroying, if you yourself do. I cannot recommend that you choose a girl who does so if you yourself do not - it is selfish, whether you understand this right now or not.