No friends, Feel lonely? If you are, click this thread!!!

[LonelyCollegeStudent]

hmm. The funny thing is that you are all right even though your opinions and beliefs negate each other. What I mean is what works for some will not work for others and what works for others will not always work for some. For some people finding a mate would solve all their problems (or at least some big ones for them) and for others that couldn't be more far from the truth.

But more specifically, as human beings, it is hard to say what it is that we need to have or do in order to solve all our different problems; we think we know what we have to do or that we should behave a certain way based on past experience to help ourselves, however, doing so could very well lead to disaster for the rest of our lives without even realizing it; or it could lead to happiness, but we really don't know. Anyhow, the point I'm trying to make is try not to be so judgmental of each other's views and opinions. No one here is wrong, different things work for different people and the opinions that follow are valid for the believer and, therefore, not invalid with the right emotional reference.

But I will say this, I do think that a certain amount of love in some way, primarily companionship of a certain mate, is necessary for a human to achieve a certain degree of positive feeling (however you want to define that positive feeling).

Hidetora: I am lost... Kyoami: Such is the human condition. - Ran

 

[AaronAgassi]

Music and street fighting are certainly not the only known endorphin triggers. Indeed, any desirable experience can be reduced and dismissed as an endorphin rush. But the truth is exactly the other way around. Pleasure isn't because of endorphins, rather, endorphins are the result of pleasure. Neurochemistry only follows experience. More over, needs and tastes are even known to differ between individuals.

And so, even beyond ravishing beauty and shatteringly wonderful sex, what are the other relationship values, even such as might help preserve the sex and even help things to continue going the more smoothly?

 

[lonelygirl]

Lonely college student,

You make some excellent points. One of the hard parts of being humans, in my view, is that we are all negotiating this maze called Life with no direction manual--heck, we have blindfolds on! We try to make sense of our world using our corporeal senses, and we get contradicting stuff from our brains. We're all just humans, stumbling along blindly, seeking pleasure, avoiding pain.

Love is such a wonderful thing--all the forms of love, whether it is between a man and a woman, a father and his son, two brothers, two sisters, friends, etc. And then there is a greater love such as the love of people like Mother Theresa, who dedicate their entire lives to easing the world's suffering. Fascinating. Can you imagine, that this day, there are people like her? Whether they are Christian nuns, or Buddhist monks, or any other sort of person who just wants to love the whole world, it's a lovely thought!

 

[AaronAgassi]

You might be disillusioned if you delved deeper than the PR about Mother Theresa, lonelygirl. But not to digress. The values we should be considering, are such as would fulfill us, not necessarily inspire others. What I am suggest is that we reject the idea of simply declaring disillusion with sex, beauty or even smoother relationships (just to repeat the examples already cited from the beginning of this conversation thread), and to ask ourselves what is missing in order to facilitate and preserve even such obviously desirable outcomes. If we are serious about overcoming loneliness and unhappiness, it is important to think and observe, not merely to rearrange our homilies and mythologies or seek to impose order therefrom. I advocate the will to power, not for abuse and domination of other people, but simply mastery at all of individual destiny in the pursuit of happiness.

 

[Azure]

i didn't read the rest of the thread past the middle of page two, after i saw all the fighting...but...

i'd just like to share a bit for the debaters, here..

in a quick response to the first post, if engaging in social relationships as well as romantic relations triggers this "happy" hormone, as does exercising, watching comedy shows, playing MMORPGs, etc..

then isn't that in itself saying that relationships are worth the effort?

I totally know what you mean about the propaganda "love" bullshit, but true friends, and true loves, are definately real...

I can say this without a doubt..
as a short summary of my life, right now I live with my family that feel like they don't exist. ( I see them once a day, if that, for about 10 minutes )

Work keeps me occupied until I get home, but after that, my only solace is being with my lover.

my other comfort is my best friend, and his wonderful family, that i've known most my life. unfortunately they live 400 miles away. Every break I get, (when I can afford it), i get a plane ticket out there and visit them. I feel like a normal person again for a while, but eventually i long for my lover again. So I go back home...

Then I'm hit with the crushing agony of knowing that I won't see my friends for a few months, and my nights will be lonely, inbetween seeing "Her", until I can go back for as long as I can bear without "Her"...

If you want to know what I do to keep my heart from shattering in-between these times, I watch comedy shows, play MMORPGs (flyff and conquer), and work (excercise).

If I try to do anything else, i get depressed and don't feel like doing it anymore..

The only bad part is I have seasonal insomnia, and lying in bed alone is the most painful part of the routine.



Comparing my life to all the beliefs of the debaters in this thread, I think you're all right in your own ways.

Finding relationships is probably the most gratifying and intense form of happiness we can get, but when you can accept that you don't TECHNICALLY need one, then you can be happy by yourself, as stated by askal.

Though everyone is different...and we all have different ways of finding our own happiness.

Quote Aaron: "I advocate the will to power, not for abuse and domination of other people, but simply mastery at all of individual destiny in the pursuit of happiness."

 

[lonelygirl]

Aaron, I know that Mother Theresa may have taken money from sources that weren't necessarily 'clean' but even gangsters should be allowed to give money to the sick, dying, old, and poor, no?

Mother Theresa came from a wealthy family and then dedicated her ENTIRE life to saving the sick and old and AIDS-ridden. Therefore, she is a HERO In my book!

 

[MisterD]

the hormone might be true i dont know anything about it.. but to my opinion i dont think its gonna work atleast not for me. Im feeling okei at the moment but even though im feeling sad and down watching comedy just gives me entertainment and so is watching romance and drama but interesting enought listening to sad music makes me remember of my sadness more and triggers tears from eyes to flow, but somehow after tearing i feel better and i get to think broadly about things.

to be happy or in other words being content is not just something u can trigger and or u need to study to tell urself happiness is something like a tool. Contentment/happiness is Appreciation to yourself, anything that appreciates u and reward u for it gives u happiness thus making u content and theres personality that lets u deal with failure built with ur own experience or how u are brought up. thats all.

 

[Matha]

thx for making me feel so much better man

 

[evanescencefan91]

You know those people that have tons of awesome hobbies and are great at all them,
phd, docter, can surf and does motorcross and plays guitar for a successful band.

God it just makes me want to kill myself, i want to have a cool unique life so bad. But no matter how hard i try i can never get that good at something But i think I'll just be going to work and watching tv in my free time. I have so many uncertanties about the future, I'm scared. I'll never have anyone to room with. I am terrified of marriage, and letting someone affect my life so much.

off subject but do you think some people are just born to be great at everything, and others aren't

if thats true then i think Gods a dipshit


But when lonely girl brought up mother terrisa, i'd like to think that it doesn't matterif you can play stairway to heaven or how fancy your house is. That just helping people is a better way to determine your value.

Sorry off subject, but that stuff kinda got me thinking.

But those are some really interesting points, i knew you got endorphins from running, but i didn't know you got them from social interactions and listaning to music.

And i agree that those things are the few things that just keep me going at times. I always feel more optimistic and hopeful after watching an hour and half of scrubs, of course it's a very inspirational show, jd's monologs just make you want to believe that tommorow could be differnt.

I also freaking love eating chocolate, it has the same effect

 

[frey12]

You know those people that have tons of awesome hobbies and are great at all them,
phd, docter, can surf and does motorcross and plays guitar for a successful band.

God it just makes me want to kill myself, i want to have a cool unique life so bad. But no matter how hard i try i can never get that good at something But i think I'll just be going to work and watching tv in my free time. I have so many uncertanties about the future, I'm scared. I'll never have anyone to room with. I am terrified of marriage, and letting someone affect my life so much.

off subject but do you think some people are just born to be great at everything, and others aren't

if thats true then i think Gods a dipshit


But when lonely girl brought up mother terrisa, i'd like to think that it doesn't matterif you can play stairway to heaven or how fancy your house is. That just helping people is a better way to determine your value.

Sorry off subject, but that stuff kinda got me thinking.

But those are some really interesting points, i knew you got endorphins from running, but i didn't know you got them from social interactions and listaning to music.

And i agree that those things are the few things that just keep me going at times. I always feel more optimistic and hopeful after watching an hour and half of scrubs, of course it's a very inspirational show, jd's monologs just make you want to believe that tommorow could be differnt.

I also freaking love eating chocolate, it has the same effect

I dont know any of those people but I have always figured they existed. But for example I really want to do boxing and take dancing but I dont want to deal with the people involved out of fear and a bit of just general dislike of others. However you can always try thinking of things you like to do. And if you want list them down its hard as hell. But if you actually keep a list it gets bigger as you realize. It is the only reason I have a myspace so i can list things I like. And my like 3 friends dont even look at mine so I could care less. But just try thinking of one thing you like to do not are good at but like to do.

also I love scrubs ^_^ dont like chocolate it hurts my teeth.