I'm sorry to pour out such a long 'introduction' topic on you, but I actually need feedback on this in the hope that it will help me put this story behind me as I think I'm supposed to. It ended up making me feel like a reject and a fool who didn't even deserve an honest and rational response to deal with.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zvdgGz5ooWkf_Ul_3c3Q1sfuZ8Sm5HSG/view
Now I absolutely must distract myself, am trying to make contact with new people because I'm really lonely at the moment and I've found a few guys to go walking and hiking with; I haven't met them yet, but the idea actually bores me right away (besides social anxiety), as if I foresee that they will be mediocre acquaintances, which will have nothing to do with the affection I was looking for in that man. I am afraid that it was my last chance to experience that kind of falling in love, which although uncommon, or insane, has a huge and deep potential for me.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zvdgGz5ooWkf_Ul_3c3Q1sfuZ8Sm5HSG/view
Now I absolutely must distract myself, am trying to make contact with new people because I'm really lonely at the moment and I've found a few guys to go walking and hiking with; I haven't met them yet, but the idea actually bores me right away (besides social anxiety), as if I foresee that they will be mediocre acquaintances, which will have nothing to do with the affection I was looking for in that man. I am afraid that it was my last chance to experience that kind of falling in love, which although uncommon, or insane, has a huge and deep potential for me.