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Dbruised

Member
Joined
May 13, 2023
Messages
16
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11
Location
Oklahoma
I tried searching this before creating a new thread. I’m suffering from isolation, depression, you name it. Going through a painful divorce with the woman I’m madly in love with leaving. I moved across the country 5 years to be with her and now I’m in a situation where I don’t know anyone. Like I had mentioned in another post, visiting with people online is helpful, but it doesn’t even come close to replacing the human connection of talking to someone and hearing their voice. I don’t have anyone I can spill my guts too. I don’t have anyone I can sob uncontrollably too. But I don’t just want to call the suicide hotline either and listen to someone give a learned response to what I say, tell me to go find help, and chin up it will be better. I’d like to find someone like me that doesn’t have anyone to talk to. Someone that feels like if they start talking about their pain they might spend the next 60 minutes bawling into the phone. Someone I can listen to and be there for, and someone that will listen about my pathetic life too. I don’t want to be the only one crying on the phone. Maybe we can take turns, do like 60 minute blocks several times a week, I don’t know. I’m a male, 41. I don’t care if you’re male or female, I’ll listen to anyone cry if they can do the same for me. If that sounds like something you’d be interested in drop me a private message. In the meantime I’ll keep reading and responding to posts on this site. Hope everyone is doing ok tonight.
 
We have a voice chat in the chat room. No one has used it in a while, but someone just asked the other day if anyone goes in there.

Probably not exactly what you're looking for, but it's an option if you would like to try.
 
https://www.opencounseling.com/oklahoma/oklahoma-city?page=2
Not sure where in Oklahoma you live. I did a very brief search for, 'cheap/affordable,' therapy in the Oklahoma City area.

Looks like some people in that list are on, 'Better Help,' too, which, I think, is some kind of tele-counseling, or something? I think seeing some one face to face would be better, but one can make baby steps. The nice thing about tele-counseling, though, is you can shop around a bit, without having physically go from place to place and such, perhaps. Dunno...

Not the only way to do things of course, but... May as well play corners and spin the wheel, improve your odds a bit, perhaps... Broken hearts can and do mend... Not immediately, though...

Good Luck...
 
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https://www.opencounseling.com/oklahoma/oklahoma-city?page=2
Not sure where in Oklahoma you live. I did a very brief search for, 'cheap/affordable,' therapy in the Oklahoma City area.

Looks like some people in that list are on, 'Better Help,' too, which, I think, is some kind of tele-counseling, or something? I think seeing some one face to face would be better, but one can make baby steps. The nice thing about tele-counseling, though, is you can shop around a bit, without having physically go from place to place and such, perhaps. Dunno...

Not the only way to do things of course, but... May as well play corners and spin the wheel, improve your odds a bit, perhaps... Broken hearts can and do mend... Not immediately, though...

Good Luck...
Thank you for your kind reply. You know, I thought about spinning the wheel. But in this day and age the wheel moved online. So there’s that. But mostly, I was married to a pretty good woman. And I feel like if I couldn’t make it work with her, I can’t make it work with anyone. Really and truly I believe I have no more chances. And it is my nature to not be alone. To grab the wheel, spin that son of a gun, and go with wherever it lands. My two daughters will be seeing their mother for the summer so I’ll be home alone all summer long without a friend in the world. So every instinct in me is screaming to put up some online profile and go fishing. But I know that’s wrong. I’ve got depression I need to fix. I have anger inside me I need to fix.

Having a 5 year marriage just suddenly end one day when the entire time you thought it was the greatest 5 years ever on earth, that is going to cause some major trust issues. Up until May 1st when I found out my wife didn’t love me and was leaving at the end of this month, the only thing I can think of is how in the holy heck could I ever trust my heart with another woman after this nightmare. I can already see it, I could somehow get lucky and hit the bullseye twice, find the sweetest girl in the world, and 5 years into our marriage I’d still be paranoid that one day the rug was going to get ripped out from under me again.

In the past I’ve heard women on the internet talk about how they are broken beyond repair. I never believed it and thought maybe they were attention seeking people feeling sorry for themselves. But just being able to trust someone sounds like an impossible mountain to climb. I’m not interested in the tinder think and hooking up. I’m a family man and I want a sidekick That will never give up. Someone who instead of throwing the washing machine out when it stops working, instead calls the repair man. Someone who doesn’t believe marriage is disposable. I’m basically looking for a needle in a haystack in a society that goes against those values I hold dear, with major trust and anger issues.

No, I need to be strong. Try and learn how to love myself and not be so hard on myself. And maybe find somewhere I can volunteer during my lonely free time this summer. Keep the fishing pole in the closet! Besides, I still love my wife with every beat of my heart.
 
Thank you for your kind reply. You know, I thought about spinning the wheel. But in this day and age the wheel moved online. So there’s that. But mostly, I was married to a pretty good woman. And I feel like if I couldn’t make it work with her, I can’t make it work with anyone. Really and truly I believe I have no more chances. And it is my nature to not be alone. To grab the wheel, spin that son of a gun, and go with wherever it lands. My two daughters will be seeing their mother for the summer so I’ll be home alone all summer long without a friend in the world. So every instinct in me is screaming to put up some online profile and go fishing. But I know that’s wrong. I’ve got depression I need to fix. I have anger inside me I need to fix.

Having a 5 year marriage just suddenly end one day when the entire time you thought it was the greatest 5 years ever on earth, that is going to cause some major trust issues. Up until May 1st when I found out my wife didn’t love me and was leaving at the end of this month, the only thing I can think of is how in the holy heck could I ever trust my heart with another woman after this nightmare. I can already see it, I could somehow get lucky and hit the bullseye twice, find the sweetest girl in the world, and 5 years into our marriage I’d still be paranoid that one day the rug was going to get ripped out from under me again.

In the past I’ve heard women on the internet talk about how they are broken beyond repair. I never believed it and thought maybe they were attention seeking people feeling sorry for themselves. But just being able to trust someone sounds like an impossible mountain to climb. I’m not interested in the tinder think and hooking up. I’m a family man and I want a sidekick That will never give up. Someone who instead of throwing the washing machine out when it stops working, instead calls the repair man. Someone who doesn’t believe marriage is disposable. I’m basically looking for a needle in a haystack in a society that goes against those values I hold dear, with major trust and anger issues.

No, I need to be strong. Try and learn how to love myself and not be so hard on myself. And maybe find somewhere I can volunteer during my lonely free time this summer. Keep the fishing pole in the closet! Besides, I still love my wife with every beat of my heart.
By playing corners (A roulette analogy), I just meant, perhaps look into affordable therapy, as well as reaching out online for ways to connect. I wasn't saying anything about getting back into the dating scene.

Look into some counseling, reach out online, volunteer work... Lonliness can be hard yeah. I hope you have some stuff lined up come summer, to keep a brooding mind at bay..

:)
 
Thank you for your kind reply. You know, I thought about spinning the wheel. But in this day and age the wheel moved online. So there’s that. But mostly, I was married to a pretty good woman. And I feel like if I couldn’t make it work with her, I can’t make it work with anyone. Really and truly I believe I have no more chances. And it is my nature to not be alone. To grab the wheel, spin that son of a gun, and go with wherever it lands. My two daughters will be seeing their mother for the summer so I’ll be home alone all summer long without a friend in the world. So every instinct in me is screaming to put up some online profile and go fishing. But I know that’s wrong. I’ve got depression I need to fix. I have anger inside me I need to fix.

Having a 5 year marriage just suddenly end one day when the entire time you thought it was the greatest 5 years ever on earth, that is going to cause some major trust issues. Up until May 1st when I found out my wife didn’t love me and was leaving at the end of this month, the only thing I can think of is how in the holy heck could I ever trust my heart with another woman after this nightmare. I can already see it, I could somehow get lucky and hit the bullseye twice, find the sweetest girl in the world, and 5 years into our marriage I’d still be paranoid that one day the rug was going to get ripped out from under me again.

In the past I’ve heard women on the internet talk about how they are broken beyond repair. I never believed it and thought maybe they were attention seeking people feeling sorry for themselves. But just being able to trust someone sounds like an impossible mountain to climb. I’m not interested in the tinder think and hooking up. I’m a family man and I want a sidekick That will never give up. Someone who instead of throwing the washing machine out when it stops working, instead calls the repair man. Someone who doesn’t believe marriage is disposable. I’m basically looking for a needle in a haystack in a society that goes against those values I hold dear, with major trust and anger issues.

No, I need to be strong. Try and learn how to love myself and not be so hard on myself. And maybe find somewhere I can volunteer during my lonely free time this summer. Keep the fishing pole in the closet! Besides, I still love my wife with every beat of my heart.
I liked your text, thank you for having written it :)
 

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