The Ugly One...

[CenotaphGirl]

It's funny how life works, I had this "work" group of 10 girls (yes we looked like an army on a night out)
We all met in an acting academy, the ages ranged between 17-28, most of us doubled as models and had a passion for acting.
There was one girl who always used to cry to us, she used to say how she's the "ugly one of the group"...
She'd be so insecure it was awful to watch, I'd be her procedure buddy and we'd go and have all these cosmetic procedures.


She met at guy at 21, they are married, and expecting now and he is so hot... sorry I have to mention it lol he is actually a fantasy to me.
The guy is amazing, he treats her like a princess, and at the wedding he said... "he was captivated by her beauty" I cried and cried.
I just thought wow, he saw the so called "ugly one" and thought... she's treasure... He's her only ever fella and she hit the lottery with him...
I never saw her as ugly, just a misunderstood beauty, not mainstream beauty, but she was always gorgeous to me.
I love their relationship, she never has any drama lol the most she complains about is having to do all the paper work...
It's funny we swapped places, now i'm the insecure one that cries all the time, she looks after me...

 

[Finished]

Wow! You started off great! I think I saw this video on one of those sites that keep trying to get my credit card numbers.

There is a hot / crazy graph somewhere around here. Let me go find it.

I'm feeling lazy so I'll just post the link:


If a guy wants to have an easy, happy, simple life then they marry an ugly woman. After awhile they will see how beautiful she is on the inside. Then, thanks to our brains, our eyes see them as physically beautiful.

 

[ewomack]

he said... "he was captivated by her beauty" I cried and cried.

At the risk of sounding presumptuous, I hope he's still captivated 20 years from now and doesn't get captivated by another beauty. In one of Nietzsche's more uncharacteristic passages, he says: "The shortsighted are in love - Sometimes it requires only a stronger pair of spectacles to cure the lover, and he who had the imagination to picture a face, a figure twenty years older would perhaps pass through life very undisturbed." Though Nietzsche isn't exactly the most reliable source to go to for romantic advice (he never married and never really had a relationship, but he did fall in love at least once), the quote does serve as a warning to fall in love with more than just looks. Again, hopefully that's not the case here, but many people confuse love and lust.

 

[TheSkaFish]

One thing I've learned over time is that beauty really is subjective. Yeah, there's general guidelines for what is "hot" and what is not - but it isn't always the case.

And sometimes people that might not have started out high in the looks category, are really just doing a few things wrong, and with a "tune up" of sorts, can look a lot better.

At the end of the day though I think looks only go so far, and mind/character count more - after all that's what you're going to be living with day to day, so it's really all about, is this a person I could like, enjoy talking to, spending time with. I'm sure there are lots of women that are physically hot but that I just couldn't talk to because we're not interested in the same things, don't value the same things, don't see things the same way. Or that I disagree with on things. And the more I think about it the more I think that all the looks in the world don't do me any good if I either don't like the person's character, or if I have no problem with it per se, but I'm not thrilled either, like I just don't have anything to talk to the person about, or any desire to ask them anything, or feel like there's anything we could share.

I have to think they'd be a cool adventure partner. I have to want to visit their mind, their inner world.

I have to want to talk to them, and they have to be someone I could see myself caring about.

Maybe the woman in your story was never really "ugly", she only thought she was.
And/or the guy she is with, really likes her as a person and finds that she's someone he likes to talk to and cares about.

It really is about how people make you think and feel, more than just if they turn you on physically or not. And sometimes once you like someone as a person, the physical side can develop later.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Wow! You started off great! I think I saw this video on one of those sites that keep trying to get my credit card numbers.

There is a hot / crazy graph somewhere around here. Let me go find it.

I'm feeling lazy so I'll just post the link:


If a guy wants to have an easy, happy, simple life then they marry an ugly woman. After awhile they will see how beautiful she is on the inside. Then, thanks to our brains, our eyes see them as physically beautiful.

Why is an ugly woman a simple life? Thats not nice, he saw her as beautiful when she didn't see that in her self, I thought that was what true love was all aboutttt

 

[CenotaphGirl]

At the risk of sounding presumptuous, I hope he's still captivated 20 years from now and doesn't get captivated by another beauty. In one of Nietzsche's more uncharacteristic passages, he says: "The shortsighted are in love - Sometimes it requires only a stronger pair of spectacles to cure the lover, and he who had the imagination to picture a face, a figure twenty years older would perhaps pass through life very undisturbed." Though Nietzsche isn't exactly the most reliable source to go to for romantic advice (he never married and never really had a relationship, but he did fall in love at least once), the quote does serve as a warning to fall in love with more than just looks. Again, hopefully that's not the case here, but many people confuse love and lust.

Well he said other things he loved about her, he actually handed her a rose for each thing, it was so romantic, I was just making a point of how ugly she felt compared to how beautiful she was to him, it was like... wow, so amazing. I cried like a little baby lolz

 

[CenotaphGirl]

One thing I've learned over time is that beauty really is subjective. Yeah, there's general guidelines for what is "hot" and what is not - but it isn't always the case.

And sometimes people that might not have started out high in the looks category, are really just doing a few things wrong, and with a "tune up" of sorts, can look a lot better.

At the end of the day though I think looks only go so far, and mind/character count more - after all that's what you're going to be living with day to day, so it's really all about, is this a person I could like, enjoy talking to, spending time with. I'm sure there are lots of women that are physically hot but that I just couldn't talk to because we're not interested in the same things, don't value the same things, don't see things the same way. Or that I disagree with on things. And the more I think about it the more I think that all the looks in the world don't do me any good if I either don't like the person's character, or if I have no problem with it per se, but I'm not thrilled either, like I just don't have anything to talk to the person about, or any desire to ask them anything, or feel like there's anything we could share.

I have to want to talk to them, and they have to be someone I could see myself caring about.

Maybe the woman in your story was never really "ugly", she only thought she was.
And/or the guy she is with, really likes her as a person and finds that she's someone he likes to talk to and cares about.

They are just 2 love birds lolz Honestly I'd be a liar if I said I thought she was ugly, she was always pretty to me. She wasn't as pretty as some in the group, but thats just life, theres always someone hotter.

I think yeah... theres hot women, theres ugly ones, over weight, under weight, full of plastic, full of filler... However, the most important thing is someones substance, who they really are under it all.

 

[ewomack]

Well he said other things he loved about her, he actually handed her a rose for each thing, it was so romantic, I was just making a point of how ugly she felt compared to how beautiful she was to him, it was like... wow, so amazing. I cried like a little baby lolz

I think most people find themselves unattractive to some degree. One can never live up to one's own standards. I've always thought I was hideous looking, but friends would simultaneously point out how many women wanted to date me. I did get asked out by women a fair amount, but it all didn't register until years later. At the time, I thought that they were all crazy and figured that the women were just trying to manipulate me in some way. I still don't think I'm attractive, and I've now aged, but I have a beautiful wife who tells me I'm attractive. When I first met her, guys would swarm to her, but she chose to ask me out instead. I've concluded that she must be crazy.

In the end, attractiveness doesn't matter, what matters is finding someone who will support you and be there for you, regardless of how you look.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I think most people find themselves unattractive to some degree. One can never live up to one's own standards. I've always thought I was hideous looking, but friends would simultaneously point out how many women wanted to date me. I did get asked out by women a fair amount, but it all didn't register until years later. At the time, I thought that they were all crazy and figured that the women were just trying to manipulate me in some way. I still don't think I'm attractive, and I've now aged, but I have a beautiful wife who tells me I'm attractive. When I first met her, guys would swarm to her, but she chose to ask me out instead. I've concluded that she must be crazy.

In the end, attractiveness doesn't matter, what matters is finding someone who will support you and be there for you, regardless of how you look.

Guys please... too much romance im gonna burst!! I mean the guy my friends with is a babe magnet, like he's utter perfection, however they both have complete trust in each other. People tried to split them up and told him she cheated and he didn't even consider it to be true. He was just like no way. I've never known of a couple to do that before.

 

[user 139760]

Guys please... too much romance im gonna burst!! I mean the guy my friends with is a babe magnet, like he's utter perfection, however they both have complete trust in each other. People tried to split them up and told him she cheated and he didn't even consider it to be true. He was just like no way. I've never known of a couple to do that before.

Sounds like true love to me. It's intangible and undefined, but it translates, in the best cases, in absolute devotion and trust.
When you see them again, wish them well. What they have is a one in a million.

 

[ringwood]

One thing I've learned over time is that beauty really is subjective. Yeah, there's general guidelines for what is "hot" and what is not - but it isn't always the case.

And sometimes people that might not have started out high in the looks category, are really just doing a few things wrong, and with a "tune up" of sorts, can look a lot better.

At the end of the day though I think looks only go so far, and mind/character count more - after all that's what you're going to be living with day to day, so it's really all about, is this a person I could like, enjoy talking to, spending time with. I'm sure there are lots of women that are physically hot but that I just couldn't talk to because we're not interested in the same things, don't value the same things, don't see things the same way. Or that I disagree with on things. And the more I think about it the more I think that all the looks in the world don't do me any good if I either don't like the person's character, or if I have no problem with it per se, but I'm not thrilled either, like I just don't have anything to talk to the person about, or any desire to ask them anything, or feel like there's anything we could share.

I have to think they'd be a cool adventure partner. I have to want to visit their mind, their inner world.

I have to want to talk to them, and they have to be someone I could see myself caring about.

Maybe the woman in your story was never really "ugly", she only thought she was.
And/or the guy she is with, really likes her as a person and finds that she's someone he likes to talk to and cares about.

It really is about how people make you think and feel, more than just if they turn you on physically or not. And sometimes once you like someone as a person, the physical side can develop later.

100% agree with this.

 

[Colster]

What's pretty?

Ok, I agree wholeheartedly, it's a subjective thing. But having dated a lot of pretty looking ladies, I can honestly day that in experience, few of them are beautiful people. It can range from neurosis, ego, a so forth. It's the same with guys too.

Worse still, are the gushing with love, pretty couples. Buttery smooth, oozing with admiration for each other, and smothered covered with all the icing of superficial airs and graces. Watch them nit pick and control each other. It can be calories counting. Monitoring phrases and usage of slang. It doesn't have to be the expected worries or controlling, that soaps screen or housewives of old, would gossip about. However, there is almost always something. And typically, it becomes more prevalent with high achievers, which is often also associated with classically pretty people.

Call it jingoistic stereotypes, but it's not just generally accepted, but also extremely well studied and theories proven. Just as those who have more, give less. Pretty coupled don't tend to live pretty lives in private. Although, often they do stay together throughout thick and thin. It's a co-dependency, they require one another to maintain an image, finance, or to mask insecurities.

Historically, look at how many celebrities held happy long marriages, before a scandal was revealed. How many of Hollywood's golden actors married pretty women, raised delightful children, and buggered young men in saunas and gyms.

Moving to more modern times, we have women in these idyllic relationships, being caught having sex with teenagers. There have been several documented cases over the past year, here in the UK.

As mentioned earlier, it doesn't have to be sexual activity, it can be something more nuanced. And the likelihood is the happier they seem, the greater their risk and controlling is.

And so whilst you watch their lives through their rose stained windows, you are allowing your own happiness to slip away, dreaming of fantasies and fallacies.

 

[Finished]

Why is an ugly woman a simple life? Thats not nice, he saw her as beautiful when she didn't see that in her self, I thought that was what true love was all aboutttt

A simple life is a good life free of drama and chaos. Well, as far as I know we all see and judge each other pretty clearly and bluntly until we start to see other's qualities that we like. When and if we do fall in love with the other person they appear much more attractive, even beautiful. But, that takes time. It's not an instant thing.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

What's pretty?

Ok, I agree wholeheartedly, it's a subjective thing. But having dated a lot of pretty looking ladies, I can honestly day that in experience, few of them are beautiful people. It can range from neurosis, ego, a so forth. It's the same with guys too.

Worse still, are the gushing with love, pretty couples. Buttery smooth, oozing with admiration for each other, and smothered covered with all the icing of superficial airs and graces. Watch them nit pick and control each other. It can be calories counting. Monitoring phrases and usage of slang. It doesn't have to be the expected worries or controlling, that soaps screen or housewives of old, would gossip about. However, there is almost always something. And typically, it becomes more prevalent with high achievers, which is often also associated with classically pretty people.

Call it jingoistic stereotypes, but it's not just generally accepted, but also extremely well studied and theories proven. Just as those who have more, give less. Pretty coupled don't tend to live pretty lives in private. Although, often they do stay together throughout thick and thin. It's a co-dependency, they require one another to maintain an image, finance, or to mask insecurities.

Historically, look at how many celebrities held happy long marriages, before a scandal was revealed. How many of Hollywood's golden actors married pretty women, raised delightful children, and buggered young men in saunas and gyms.

Moving to more modern times, we have women in these idyllic relationships, being caught having sex with teenagers. There have been several documented cases over the past year, here in the UK.

As mentioned earlier, it doesn't have to be sexual activity, it can be something more nuanced. And the likelihood is the happier they seem, the greater their risk and controlling is.

And so whilst you watch their lives through their rose stained windows, you are allowing your own happiness to slip away, dreaming of fantasies and fallacies.

Right, let me... look at this...

So she always was very pretty but never felt it ever because she was slightly bigger, I mean slight. We could still share clothing, she also always thought she looked like a boy, everyone said of course not. She couldn't shake the feeling and it left her depressed. If a group of guys walked over, she'd need the loo, even her parents thought she was gay, it was like this huge rumour around her family, she just had crushing low self-esteem.

I doubt they are perfect, but compared to what I've put myself through for the idea of love, I think what they have is something special. He boosts her, he is actually a good man, like people said they exist and I would think... oh yeah... but deep down I'd hope. I give credit where credit is due, he's hot enough that he could be a right jerk and still have someone, but he is actually the nicest guy i've ever met.

I think the thing I admire about their relationship is the trust, I just cant, I could text her right now, I saw him kissing so and so and she'd be like... not him. He is 100% the same with her. I hope they can keep that, I have never seen that, my parents were married for years but if my dad was around and I said to my mum, oh I saw dad with a brunette, she'd slap him no questions asked

I can't say how long they will be together, but if I had a relationship like that for 1 year, I'd consider myself the luckiest person ever. To experience something that pulled me into existence, that granted my wish to be seen as beautiful. Idk... I just think its not an everyday thing.

I think for some people, seeing others happy makes them feel so down and parted from what they want, however, it inspires me that romance can happen, love is real, and one day... I'd brave the trenches to find it... one day.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

When and if we do fall in love with the other person they appear much more attractive, even beautiful. But, that takes time. It's not an instant thing.

I think this is beautiful, I used to say in school like, omg imagine we come back and all the ugly girls are hot and all the hot girls are ugly.. lol and they'd say no way! However.... that's sort of what happened, the hottest girls 8/10 of them if im being generous... look as if they have been hit by life, whereas the nerds finally got their figure right, and enough money to look a little fashionable. Can't say the same is true for the men though sadly... they still pretty much look the same to me... and my standards.

I like how men age so im the worse judge... biased lol

I think attraction can build overtime just like looks change over time, for sure. Thats why I tend to be attracted to things that can't be changed, more than fleeting things.

 

[Finished]

I think this is beautiful, I used to say in school like, omg imagine we come back and all the ugly girls are hot and all the hot girls are ugly.. lol and they'd say no way! However.... that's sort of what happened, the hottest girls 8/10 of them if im being generous... look as if they have been hit by life, whereas the nerds finally got their figure right, and enough money to look a little fashionable. Can't say the same is true for the men though sadly... they still pretty much look the same to me... and my standards.

I like how men age so im the worse judge... biased lol

I think attraction can build overtime just like looks change over time, for sure. Thats why I tend to be attracted to things that can't be changed, more than fleeting things.

I'll let you know when Androids come out. You could get artificial insemination (pick the guy's donation based on genetics), have your family, and then have an Android as your mate. I really don't think people realize how awesome Androids will be. Not only can they be your mate, but they can do all things you hate to do and other people won't do.

From the moive AI: (Once you go AI you never go back.) Ha! ha!

 

[ringwood]

From the moive AI: (Once you go AI you never go back.) Ha! ha!

If AI looked like Jude Law, I *might* be convinced to give it a whirl!

 

[TheSkaFish]

I'll let you know when Androids come out. You could get artificial insemination (pick the guy's donation based on genetics), have your family, and then have an Android as your mate. I really don't think people realize how awesome Androids will be. Not only can they be your mate, but they can do all things you hate to do and other people won't do.

From the moive AI: (Once you go AI you never go back.) Ha! ha!

Got to be careful with her...you could put your eyes out on those things!

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I have a friend and he agrees that all the females I say are attractive are attractive. However the ones he points out to me are not attractive by my standards. In fact depending on how she dresses I have mistaken his wife for a male. Yet he claims she is this grand beauty. That is just how life works. Some people have all the luck and other people get shafted

 

[SpectraApocalypse]

I wish that would happen to me. Guess I just gotta make some money cause Im ugly as fresia. No one will ever be in love with me or attracted to me but at least theyll act like it when I flash some cash at them.