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Azariah

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How do you lose your virginity?

If a girl has lesbian sex is she still a virgin?

What if she uses a dildo?

If a boy gets his stuff sucked by a chick are they both still virgins?
 

Addryn

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It seems to me that now every person has his own concept of virginity and what needs to be done to lose it. For many people this is sexual contact, for someone oral sex. In general, people don't really care if you're a virgin or not. That's not what people ask when they meet (at least in my mind)
 

Forgottendanfan

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I'll answer the first question only.

If you're me, you don't. At the age of 35 I've accepted that I never will, and that's OK. Some people never go abroad, smoke weed or learn a musical instrument. Sex is just something I'll probably never get the chance to do, and that's unfortunate, but something I've come to terms with.
 

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I'll answer the first question only.

If you're me, you don't. At the age of 35 I've accepted that I never will, and that's OK. Some people never go abroad, smoke weed or learn a musical instrument. Sex is just something I'll probably never get the chance to do, and that's unfortunate, but something I've come to terms with.
So you would never consider booking an escort, even just once to see what it is like?
Not suggesting that you go down this road, but just curious as to why you have not considered it, especially for your age.
 

Forgottendanfan

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So you would never consider booking an escort, even just once to see what it is like?
Not suggesting that you go down this road, but just curious as to why you have not considered it, especially for your age.

First and foremost, no. I'm not remotely interested in the idea of paying for intimacy. It'll happen naturally, reciprocally, with genuine affection and without money being exchanged or it won't happen at all. Secondly, I live in the U.K. and I'm not even sure "escorts" are legal over here, never mind knowing where or how to actually find one.
 
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In my mind
First and foremost, no. I'm not remotely interested in the idea of paying for intimacy. It'll happen naturally, reciprocally, with genuine affection and without money being exchanged or it won't happen at all. Secondly, I live in the U.K. and I'm not even sure "escorts" are legal over here, never mind knowing where or how to actually find one.
Lets ask Reddit:


Apparently they are legal there. But........ paying for it is a totally turnoff and knowing LOTS of guys, some very disgusting, came before you. No thanks.
 

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First and foremost, no. I'm not remotely interested in the idea of paying for intimacy. It'll happen naturally, reciprocally, with genuine affection and without money being exchanged or it won't happen at all. Secondly, I live in the U.K. and I'm not even sure "escorts" are legal over here, never mind knowing where or how to actually find one.
Thanks for answering.
I totally get it.
It's not for everyone.
In fact, most guys, I believe, are adverse to it.
My cousin is 59 has had sex less then 10 times in his life and while he has asked me about it (he knows what I do), he has never actually pulled the trigger, and I doubt he ever will. Good for you on sticking with your convictions.

But........ paying for it is a totally turnoff and knowing LOTS of guys, some very disgusting, came before you. No thanks.
Get your point as well. There are all types of classes of working girls. Upscale escorts are much more expensive and thus significantly lower volume than "fast house" girls, but sure, I understand your sentiment.
 

abbynormal

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being that the escort experience is largely "fake," i will stick with suzie d. silicone.
 

TheSkaFish

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paying for it is a totally turnoff and knowing LOTS of guys, some very disgusting, came before you. No thanks.

I firmly, staunchly believe this, despite being older and still having never experienced being with a woman even though I would like to at least once before I give up the ghost. I believe that in order to even be "average", "normal", "just OK", you have to be able to attract someone and have a romantic relationship. It's just a part of normal living to me, like making friends - not an exotic luxury extra.

The thing that really gets me, besides the STD risk, general grossness, and the illegality of it, is that it's one of those things where once it's done, it can't be undone.

Once you pay for sex, you will always be someone that paid for sex. I don't think I could have any confidence, self-esteem, pride or dignity after that, no matter if I achieved anything or not. I think I would live in a state of permanent humiliation, and I hate humiliation. I'm extremely sensitive to it, more than most people, to the point where it's almost an obsession. I don't think I could live with it at all.

The thing is, I'm not a member of any kind of elite you could think of. Most people would say I have no business caring about dignity, that I should just "accept" being low-status and stop pretending that I'm not, but I've always strongly believed that your dignity is something you have to hang on to and protect. You can't act desperate, you can't debase yourself or allow yourself to be debased. And that's the thing, I hate "accepting". All of this is what bothers me so intensely whenever anyone suggests that prostitutes are the answer to loneliness. To pay for sex, is like to accept society's insult that you are so inferior, that you have to pay for what most guys get for free just for existing, not doing anything special at all. It's like agreeing with everyone who put you down and saying "yeah, I really am unattractive". But as long as you don't accept the insult, as long as you hold on to your dignity and not let life kick you into low-status, desperation, and humiliation, you can still hold your head up high, while you try to figure attraction out.

I know I'm not perfect and I have some areas of my life that I need to work on. But it doesn't mean I have to take insults, and I'm not going to take society's side against myself. Some might call it stubbornness but I have to be on my own side, even if that side is just me. I can't give up the ship.
 

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To pay for sex, is like to accept society's insult that you are so inferior, that you have to pay for what most guys get for free just for existing, not doing anything special at all. It's like agreeing with everyone who put you down and saying "yeah, I really am unattractive"

Again, like the others I totally get your point.
And I don't want to derail this thread by dragging out the P4P angle.
But that part I highlighted in bold struck a note with me.
The entire reason I started seeing "working girls" at 19 (and been doing it now exclusively for almost 38 years) is based upon that bold part. For you see, I felt that if I had lowered my sites in college and started dating a Plain Jane or a fat girl or something, that would be me admitting that everyone who treated me like dirt in grade school and HS had won. I only wanted hot looking girls, so I did the only thing I could do to get them. I paid for them. Not saying it was the right thing to do, but the way I saw it, it was my only choice. And it's all I've ever done.

Unlike what you describe though, I have no feelings of humiliation at all. None whatsoever. I did not choose to be in my circumstance, and the way I see it, I did what I had to do to get female companionship, even if only temporary and usually by the hour. If God wanted me to be like most others, he should have given me the genetics that make females attracted to me. Or at least not be treated like dirt for 12 straight years as a kid growing up.
 
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