What is your opinion on this?

[CenotaphGirl]

I heard on a forum around loneliness, that it is not a feeling it is an experience.

Really made me think and I thought, I wonder what you guys think of that statement, do you feel lonely or do you experience it ?

 

[Cherubino]

I guess it's about the world outside you (experiencing) vs. the inner world (feeling)

 

[ringwood]

Both, I think. Like the feeling when you’re surrounded by people - at a busy mall or a concert or wherever - yet you feel lonely inside. Or coming home to an empty house and experiencing the absolute quiet and stillness of nobody else being there.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I guess it's about the world outside you (experiencing) vs. the inner world (feeling)

Yeah I thought for me it has been a strong feeling.

Both, I think. Like the feeling when you’re surrounded by people - at a busy mall or a concert or wherever - yet you feel lonely inside. Or coming home to an empty house and experiencing the absolute quiet and stillness of nobody else being there.

This is true to me, I am often surrounded by so many people but still so alone. Often thats 100% how I feel. The experience of loneliness is a foreign concept to me

 

[TheRealCallie]

I agree with Ringwood, but I would put it more like being ALONE is an experience, whereas being LONELY is a feeling.

 

[Unsigned]

Not sure I know the difference.
I've always been alone so it's really all I've ever experienced.
"Feeling lonely" and "experiencing loneliness" are the same things for me.

To be clear, when I say lonely I mean being without a female SO.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I agree with Ringwood, but I would put it more like being ALONE is an experience, whereas being LONELY is a feeling.

Mind… blown I’m gonna pretend I thought of this

 

[Cherubino]

Religious people like you should hardly feel lonely

 

[randomguy]

Feelings of loneliness are personal so everyone's experience of it will be different.

For me it's a transient feeling that comes and goes or situational, for example a certain time or place

For most, I think, it's a feeling they get when their need for meaningful and rewarding relationships or social contact isn't met.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Too much attention and I get anxious, not enough attention and I end up paranoid and talking to myself while hallucinating without really realizing that's what I'm doing.

I don't know if I'd call it a feeling or an experience, because in a way it can be kind of both?

I've learned how to deal with my feelings more directly. I have a systemic way of handling myself emotionally. But I didn't really understand how disrupted my mental health was until I spent 3 months alone without cable, television, internet, with no game console, no friends in town, and living on half a paycheck trying to pay bills.

I'm more socially overwhelmed these days than I am lonely.
That's largely in part because I'm living with my family, which is 6 other people, I manage a staff of 12 people at work, I've got 1 friend I see every week as a sort of caregiver, and 1 friend who doesn't seem to understand why I'm always too overwhelmed and socially burned out.

Because I'm trying to hurtle my paycheck, sleep, diet and exercise plan around 19 other people in my life at any given time.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Not sure I know the difference.
I've always been alone so it's really all I've ever experienced.
"Feeling lonely" and "experiencing loneliness" are the same things for me.

To be clear, when I say lonely I mean being without a female SO.

Thats the only loneliness you experience? You never feel like you wish you had a friend to just enjoy life with in a platonic way?

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Religious people like you should hardly feel lonely

Truthfully I am agnostic, I believe in a higher power but sometimes I feel like the path of the believer is more lonely than an atheist these days.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Feelings of loneliness are personal so everyone's experience of it will be different.

For me it's a transient feeling that comes and goes or situational, for example a certain time or place

For most, I think, it's a feeling they get when their need for meaningful and rewarding relationships or social contact isn't met.

I think I feel alone because I feel like im always anticipating abuse, people abuse me so much It can be so lonely just waiting for it to happen, never being able to let people in fully, keeping them 4 steps back. Idk if anyone has ever felt like that? Idk…

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Too much attention and I get anxious, not enough attention and I end up paranoid and talking to myself while hallucinating without really realizing that's what I'm doing.

I don't know if I'd call it a feeling or an experience, because in a way it can be kind of both?

I've learned how to deal with my feelings more directly. I have a systemic way of handling myself emotionally. But I didn't really understand how disrupted my mental health was until I spent 3 months alone without cable, television, internet, with no game console, no friends in town, and living on half a paycheck trying to pay bills.

I'm more socially overwhelmed these days than I am lonely.
That's largely in part because I'm living with my family, which is 6 other people, I manage a staff of 12 people at work, I've got 1 friend I see every week as a sort of caregiver, and 1 friend who doesn't seem to understand why I'm always too overwhelmed and socially burned out.

Because I'm trying to hurtle my paycheck, sleep, diet and exercise plan around 19 other people in my life at any given time.

Oh Apexie that awful and overwhelming, dont you think that its two sides of the same coin being socially overwhelmed and lonely is it like you feel as if you cant settle ?

 

[Unsigned]

Thats the only loneliness you experience? You never feel like you wish you had a friend to just enjoy life with in a platonic way?

Yes, the need for a female in my life is the loneliness I feel and it is overwhelming.
Sometimes I get too depressed to function normally.
It comes on suddenly sometimes, but it causes me to just dwell on why things are like this for me, dwell on the past and stuff, and before I know it my entire day is shot.

Here's the thing. I do have friends. Some really great guys. Some I have known for over 30 years, other I have only known for a few years.
Some from decades ago, some from jobs I've had over the years, some, believe it or not, from a group we had on a "manosphere" site a number of years ago and we all stayed in touch and get together, and lately from my "mongering" (we have meetups, go to dinner & drinks, and sometimes even go to brothels together -- separate girls & rooms of course).

But, while "Hanging out with the guys" is fun enough, it just doesn't do it for me.
I absolutely need a female in my life. And not one I pay for. Someone who genuinely wants to be with me. Emptiness is a destroyer.

EDIT:
Today is a good example.
I have a day off and had lots of things I planned to take care of.
But instead I started dwelling on my situation, and I still have not gotten ready to go out.
Also, porn is very bad for this. Especially the "amateur porn". I watch it, and think about how I have never had a girl do those things with me for free like the guys in those videos and it really messes me up.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Oh Apexie that awful and overwhelming, dont you think that its two sides of the same coin being socially overwhelmed and lonely is it like you feel as if you cant settle ?

Perpetually in my life, I'm the thing that doesn't fit.
It's been that way as long as I can remember.
I was too nerdy to totally fit into the music scene I was into in my younger years, and too aggressive to totally fit into the nerdy groups I'd hang out with in my younger years as well.
Hell, I don't even fit in with my own family, either.
I couldn't even introduce a lot of my friends to each other because I knew that they absolutely wouldn't get along with each other.
I'm kind of, more like the quiet guy in the background, in both, and most social situations.
It used to bug me when I was in my early teens, but I gradually just got used to it and grew out of it as I got older.
Even now, it's still kind of that way sometimes.
Were it not for their differences they'd probably get along.
But unfortunately the only actual common link, is me.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Yes, the need for a female in my life is the loneliness I feel and it is overwhelming.
Sometimes I get too depressed to function normally.
It comes on suddenly sometimes, but it causes me to just dwell on why things are like this for me, dwell on the past and stuff, and before I know it my entire day is shot.

Here's the thing. I do have friends. Some really great guys. Some I have known for over 30 years, other I have only known for a few years.
Some from decades ago, some from jobs I've had over the years, some, believe it or not, from a group we had on a "manosphere" site a number of years ago and we all stayed in touch and get together, and lately from my "mongering" (we have meetups, go to dinner & drinks, and sometimes even go to brothels together -- separate girls & rooms of course).

But, while "Hanging out with the guys" is fun enough, it just doesn't do it for me.
I absolutely need a female in my life. And not one I pay for. Someone who genuinely wants to be with me. Emptiness is a destroyer.

EDIT:
Today is a good example.
I have a day off and had lots of things I planned to take care of.
But instead I started dwelling on my situation, and I still have not gotten ready to go out.
Also, porn is very bad for this. Especially the "amateur porn". I watch it, and think about how I have never had a girl do those things with me for free like the guys in those videos and it really messes me up.

Sounds awful, do you think maybe you have a sex addiction? I think even the most successful marriages have a love sex rate.

Please try your best not to watch videos like that, it is not healthy for you can be damaging. Just subcribe to my … only kidding but in all seriousness please try your best to avoid them they can lead to addiction and incompatibility.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Perpetually in my life, I'm the thing that doesn't fit.
It's been that way as long as I can remember.
I was too nerdy to totally fit into the music scene I was into in my younger years, and too aggressive to totally fit into the nerdy groups I'd hang out with in my younger years as well.
Hell, I don't even fit in with my own family, either.
I couldn't even introduce a lot of my friends to each other because I knew that they absolutely wouldn't get along with each other.
I'm kind of, more like the quiet guy in the background, in both, and most social situations.
It used to bug me when I was in my early teens, but I gradually just got used to it and grew out of it as I got older.
Even now, it's still kind of that way sometimes.
Were it not for their differences they'd probably get along.
But unfortunately the only actual common link, is me.

You know what! I agree! You dont fit in, because you wasnt made to Some people cant help but to shine, everyone will exclude you and try to tear you down because they know they cannot being to enter your league. Thats my honest opinion about you, the nerds didnt want you because you fry their brains like you fry mine sweets im humble enough to admit it

 

[Richard_39]

I heard on a forum around loneliness, that it is not a feeling it is an experience.

Really made me think and I thought, I wonder what you guys think of that statement, do you feel lonely or do you experience it ?

Well, loneliness is more about a feeling than an actual experience.
The experience would be on how you deal with the actual feeling, how you live with it and wether or not you do anything to cope with it. Maybe then you can say you experienced loneliness. However, it can be, depending on mindset or circumstances, a good or a bad experience. Some people enjoy their solitude. Others detest it and can't cope with it.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Well, loneliness is more about a feeling than an actual experience.
The experience would be on how you deal with the actual feeling, how you live with it and wether or not you do anything to cope with it. Maybe then you can say you experienced loneliness. However, it can be, depending on mindset or circumstances, a good or a bad experience. Some people enjoy their solitude. Others detest it and can't cope with it.

Wow Richard, look at you being all philosophical! Do you consider solitude and loneliness the same thing?