I am new here, wanting to talk to people with similar problems. I moved a couple of weeks ago and I decided that instead of reaching out to people, which I always have to do if I want to talk to anybody, I would just stop calling, stop texting and everybody and see what happens. Well it's exactly what I expected, zero calls, zero text messages, nobody asks if I like my new place, or how I'm going, absolutely nothing. I've found in my life people are so ready and happy for me to go away and they don't have to talk to me anymore. What is about me that makes people act that way, am I really that ugly, and I just dull. I don't tell them about my problems and my loneliness, I try to be positive, I don't want to be the debbie downer around other people. When I was younger I had a lot of relationships, a lot of sex, so I never felt I was considered unattractive, now that I am older that has changed of course, but still am I that horribly ugly now that nobody can stand the sight of me. I went to this group from meetup last week, something I had never done before, it was actually drag queen bingo and I was having a good time, I was talking to some really nice people, then something happened. There were about 10 people table and one girl (who was at the other end of the table and I wasn't talking to) stood up and said "It's picture time". So everybody gets up, and I get up (I assumed she wanted a group picture),, and poses for the picture. So I get up, and she looks at me and says "I just want this to be the friends in the group". so of course I had to sit back down at the table all by myself (as usual), and I just felt so awkward and embarrassed. I am an awkward weirdo anyway. Anyway I had never used meetup before and I will never try it again. Sorry to go on and on but does anyone feel the same way maybe? Please let me know.