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silentscream

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I could never imagine that one day i will spend time typing in a Lonely forume! let me tell you something.. all my life i have been searching for happiness and friends and i didn't find any..i am a kind of person who never imagine that one day i will be surrounded by no one! 23 years i have been dreaming to be surrounded by GROUP of frinds that simply makes me happy! but after 23 years of my life i only discovered NOW! that there is nothing named frindship ,nothing named CARE, no one cares to even call,u may ask why i didn't notice that b4 and the answer will be simply bec i always took the first step(the first step to call, arrange a gathering..etc)even in my birthdays i always waited for wt i cal friends to show up in my party i sit there LONELY for hours and CALL them several times on my BIRTHDAY to make sure they are coming and they come after 3 hours or 4 late,,i feel they just don't wanna come! i feel i have been pushing them to be my friends,,i am so sad i noticed that so late!!well i have a lot to say ,,,but can someone tell me WHY?! why there is no frindship on earth! its only FAKEEEEEEE friendship no one cares!! i don't feel happy atall, i get jealous from some of my friends that they mayhave the good life i wanted and i hate to admit that i am jealous bec i always dreamt to be the STAR among my foriends..so instead i say they are the ones who are jealous from me..thats simply it..i hope u can get a picture of what im talking about here...if anyone did...tell me WHY
 
I'm sorry I wish I could tell you why, I don;t know myself. It gets old,,your only 23 your young, I used to have alot but I took it for granted and lost it all, now I have nothing, and noone.
 
every once in a while i get one of those lonley emotional breakdowns, like when im alone and kinda just there regreting things, but as much as i hate it when that happens you gotta admit after you pass out, the next day you feel a little better and kind of silly thinking the thoughts you did. well hope u feel better ttyl
 
Yeah, I agree with catch22. A few days ago I felt really bad about my life and I felt very lonely and unloved. Then the next day I was just wondering to myself why I thought half the thoughts I did. I'm feeling alot better today, but I sure feel lonely on Friday nights.
 
thanks for sharing..well i think catch and broken dreams are right,,,but what if you really have no one to share your thoughts !!!!!!!! the problem here is that i am LONELY!! how can i wake up tom and say "emm i think i ws just a liitle more emotional yesterday"!
well i try to say that sometimes to my self in order to beleive that i was wrong thinking that way,,but itd not working..i really feel lonely and SAD all the time..how can i find happiness when its hard for me to be happy by my self!!!
 
I'm learning to be content in myself and quit fighting my loneliness and just accept it...I deal with the fact noone cares and I have been forgotten about, hell even God has forgotten me, but I came into this world alone and I will leave alone, to the hell with everything else...I don't have dreams beacuse they don't come true, and I have learned not to get excited about things beacuse they most likely won't turn out..(I'm keeping it real). I finally am becoming at peace with all this honeysuckle....
 
I think we all have it right and all have it wrong. We live in such a disconnected time and culture, at least in the midwestern United States. Unless we fit in some box of someone else's construction "there must be something wrong with us." For me loneliness is just one of the multitude of emotions we all feel. I, too, have waited my whole life (50 years) for that elusive thing called friendship. Now I know how to be my own friend. Unfortunately, I still have too many of the "when will you be a real person?" words and attitudes of others toward me that are still there, festering like some infection that was never quite healed. (yes, someone did ask me that question!) I quess that's why I found this site. Words and behaviors of my husband have fed those old feelings and brought them back. Does this make sense? Why can't we get some kind of emotional antibiotic that will get rid of that junk others infected us with? LOL
 
i feel you man... im at a point where i think its impossible to make friends anymore due to many disappointing incidents, ive completely lost my faith on all my friends. they never call me except buying weed from me, whenever i call my friends, hardly anyone pick up my phone, even from my non stoner friends... its so bad, i think its either a curse or just bad luck that spans my entire life. i dont even hang out with my friends anymore because they dispect me way too much and i end up ahving a horrible time always. these wounds will never heal. i can neve wake up one morning and be happy with who i am.

homebased said:
I think we all have it right and all have it wrong. We live in such a disconnected time and culture, at least in the midwestern United States. Unless we fit in some box of someone else's construction "there must be something wrong with us." For me loneliness is just one of the multitude of emotions we all feel. I, too, have waited my whole life (50 years) for that elusive thing called friendship. Now I know how to be my own friend. Unfortunately, I still have too  many of the "when will you be a real person?" words and attitudes of others toward me that are still there, festering like some infection that was never quite healed.


its not just in the midwest. its in a lot of places. i live in southern california and theres tons and tons of people living here. but most people are still lonely. its because of the suburbs. neighbours dont really talk to each other, everyones kinda living their own life, shuts themselves away, turns them into really selfish people. and girls are shallow as fresia.they just hook up with guys that can talk but really dont give a fresia. its our style of living that are making us lonely. whereas people living in the cities in the apartments, walking on the streets to work...etc theres way more chance and easier to interact with people. but i could be wrong.
 
SighX99 said:
and girls are shallow as fresia.they just hook up with guys that can talk but really dont give a fresia. its our style of living that are making us lonely. whereas people living in the cities in the apartments, walking on the streets to work...etc theres way more chance and easier to interact with people. but i could be wrong.

First of all, not all girls are shallow, and not all of them 'hook up' with the wrong guys.  I've never hooked up with anyone.  You've had some bad luck romantically, but that doesn't mean there aren't a lot of really great women out there to meet.

Second, I've lived in small towns, large cities, suburbs, and rural agricultural areas.  I don't think it is easier or harder to meet people or connect in any of those situations.  You have to put yourself out there, and keep doing it.  I know this can be hard if you have some disappointments, but you can't expect to always have good luck.

I think it helps to stay positive.
 
for sure. i think i put it the wrong way.... i meant most girls.... i kno there are good ones out here.... its hard to stay positive, waking up everyday thinkin "**** it im still here, dealing with the same old boring honeysuckle and lonely as usual" ...
 

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