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Antihero

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I feel as though I really have not been around here much in the last couple of years but due to recent events I'll probably pop in a little bit more often. Also, I just feel like typing something. This is a great community, so why not here...

Earlier tonight I was just told by my girlfriend of 3 years that she has come to the realization that she is lesbian. How embarrassing. Not for her, she is who she is, but for me for even being in this all in the first place. I've seen this coming for the last 3 months but it still hurts, especially in this way. It was a slow, painful and inevitable death.

Try to understand, I feel led on, that my time was wasted, and a piece of me was thrown away. Now, I KNOW that was not her conscious intention, but that's what (I felt) happened nonetheless. I need some time. After she moves out on Saturday I'm going to pretend that she does not exist for a while.

I know I'll be fine, but this night is so painful for my mind. I work nights and I'm there right now. I'm amazed in my apparent ability to not break down and talk without sounding like I wanted to die. That's something, right?

Anyway, I don't really know where I'm going with this so I'll shut up for the time being.

I don't know

I don't know sh..
 
I've never came across you before as I'm fairly new to the site.

I wouldnt say it's good to see you back posting (for the reasons stated above).

I'm one who understands about wasted time. Never been in your situation, but I tend to waste time trying to impress people. Could be days/weeks/months/years.

You need to become more selfish (as do i).

Did the relationship seem like it was going somewhere? I know 3 years is a long time, but did you see a future in the log run?

Do you feel that its hard meeting people etc?

Only advice you can really give in a break up situation is to keep your head up, be strong, and dont let it get you down. Plenty more fish in the sea etc (hope that doesnt sound to much like a kick in the nuts!)
 
Legato said:
I've never came across you before as I'm fairly new to the site.

I wouldnt say it's good to see you back posting (for the reasons stated above).

Agreed, and I'm sorry If I came off as an ass saying that.

Legato said:
You need to become more selfish (as do i).

Yeah, I'm going to try to start working on that.

Legato said:
Did the relationship seem like it was going somewhere? I know 3 years is a long time, but did you see a future in the log run?

If you had asked me about 6-9 months ago I would have said possibly. After that time I really started to have doubts.

Legato said:
Do you feel that its hard meeting people etc?

Yes, but a lot of that just has to do with shyness which I also need to work on


Legato said:
Only advice you can really give in a break up situation is to keep your head up, be strong, and dont let it get you down. Plenty more fish in the sea etc (hope that doesnt sound to much like a kick in the nuts!)

I agree on the keep you head up thing. I know this downturn will last only as long as I want it to. I have to get myself out there and try. In the end that will be enough... perhaps.
 
You never came out looking an ass dont worry,

I was more concerned my response would seem like that!
 
I am sorry that you are going through this difficult time. You understand that things are going to be okay and while that is something, that always feels so far down the road when a person is hurting.
 
Wow, that sucks. Sorry. I guess...welcome back?

I have a friend who came out as a lesbian, she was married for many years to a guy. I've never asked her about he divorce. I worked with one girl who was bi, then decided to go full on lesbian after her boyfriend knocked her up and left her. She hated men. That's different than your situation though. If I can I'll talk to my friend, maybe her experience might give some insight that I can pass on to you to help you through this time. Unless she blames her husband for something like the girl I used to work with.

 
I don't know how you get that. Sometimes feelings just are. That doesn't even mean that they remain.
 
Ouch Antihero, welcome back. Even though, I'd prefer you not to be here, if you know what I mean lol (I want you to be feeling good and not down :p).

Suddenly realizing she's a lesbian? Must be quite a startle for you. Good luck!
 
When I met her she identified as straight and talked about how so and so male celebrity was cute and what not. I still should have seen this coming though even from the beginning.

Back in October she came out as Bi, and while I do believe there are some legit bisexuals, a vast majority are just gay in denial (especially in the American south). I should have ended it back then but ended up just grinning and bearing it like I usually do with unpleasant things.

 
Awe come on now, be honest. When she came out as bi you probably thought HOT ****!! Luckiest guy in the world! LOL Just kidding :D Or am I? :)

 
I heard back from my friend, it was the first time I've asked her about this sort of thing. I'm going to PM you what she wrote me. Her (12 year) marriage ended well, but her wife went through something similar to your situation. I hope it helps.
 
To be honest, she probably did care about you and really tried to be straight, but just couldn't. This is kind of sad when you think about it. :/
 

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