Can I train myself to forget memories I never want to think about again?

[roguewave]

Or will attempting this only cause me to repress them, sending me into some sort of psychosis later, when the repressed memories resurface, and in the meantime, torturing me from the depths of my psyche.
What happens when you have confronted your bad memories but they refuse to let you alone?

 

[SophiaGrace]

perhaps grounding might be of use. Telling yourself that those memories comprise the past, and look around where you are now, noting you are no longer in your past but somewhere else.

 

[Ak5]

I usually tell myself "It's the past, fresia it."

Honestly, forgetting about it is going to take a ton of "mental work", the best you can do is convince yourself it's the past and should remain in the past.

 

[Lonely in BC]

Being slightly older than you allows me to say that the sting of painful memories and experiences definitely eases with time and to some degree they do get shoved further back in the recesses of your memory. I suppose you could try hypnosis or some form of psychological therapy to "forget" or repress painful memories but the thought of paying someone to mess with my mind (after so many have done it for free) horrifies me. There is also the concern that other memories might be compromised whilst trying to whittle away at those that trouble.

Hope I don't come across as flippant but I say stay the course and let time show you the path.

 

[roguewave]

Being slightly older than you allows me to say that the sting of painful memories and experiences definitely eases with time and to some degree they do get shoved further back in the recesses of your memory. I suppose you could try hypnosis or some form of psychological therapy to "forget" or repress painful memories but the thought of paying someone to mess with my mind (after so many have done it for free) horrifies me. There is also the concern that other memories might be compromised whilst trying to whittle away at those that trouble.

Hope I don't come across as flippant but I say stay the course and let time show you the path.

I am afraid of letting someone I hardly know mess with my mind too. And to think of paying them to do it! Thanks for your insights!

---

perhaps grounding might be of use. Telling yourself that those memories comprise the past, and look around where you are now, noting you are no longer in your past but somewhere else.

Living in the present is such a challenge...but I will give it more of a try now that I see it could help with this issue.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

You cant rid of them completely.
You can disbust them.

Let go of them and feelings attached to them
As it arraises. Dont figure it out.

You can do simple excercises phydically.
So that you might see it phydically.

Pick up an object...such as a set of keys.
Roll the object in you hand.
Then grip the object as tight as you can.
Feel the tension in you body and the slight
Pains in your hand as you grip tighter.
Then drop the object out of your hand.
Feel the release. See the object falling away
From you.

---

Do this exercise often...
Would ypu
Could you
When?

Your awear the you have the power to let go.
Kinf da flushing your poo poo down the tiolet.
You dont disect your poo poo..

Then you basically apply this internally
With your negative thoughts and feelings..
Flush them away as they arrises or desolve
Them into the nothing.

Practice or trainning your thought process
Patterns.

---

TUNNEL VISIONS....
the negative memorise can get you mind into tunnel
vision because of the strong emotionals attached to them.

---

Do simple exercise on the outdide daily.
FOCUS ON various Objects for 5 to 10 sec.
From near to afar. Any objects...a bird,
Clouds, light poles....etc

What it dose is tranning your brain to
Re shift your fovus at your command.
You are in control of your focus.
It also trains you braim to get out of
Tunnel vision.
Go outside in open space..
AN OPEN FIELD OR PARK.

Then apply this interally when you catch
Yoirself in a tunnel vision.

---

The course in miracles basicailly has the
Samectype of exercise....but it gose
Into mote details.

ITll ask you to focus on any object in a room.
Then ask to give the meanings of that object
To you..but itll ask you to repeat...that
object has no meanings.....
Then to the next object.

Then you simply apply thst to your negative
Thouhhts or memories.....
whatever you make of it....it has no meaings
Anymore. Hence no pains because it has
no meanings anymore
Basically it gets you to the same place of
Not figure it out anymore

---

The fire burns itself out if you dont feed it anymore.

---

Meditations teaches you the something.

Basically just observe your thoughts as a psasing
Parade..not controling your thoughts
Just observe without judgements, giving it meanings
Or figuring it out.....
Eventually the mind will come to a rest on its
Own.....Whalla In the moment.
As SG say.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

You also do tensions and release exercise.
This will also help you to recognize what
Your body is telling you...

Stretch you body or feel the tensions
take a deep breathe and hold it
For 15 sec..

Then relax your body as you breath out.

Do 10 to 15 reps....

Youll notice youll be more relax aftet
The exercise.

---

You can also do cool breating.

Pretend like your nose is cold
or your breathing cool air....
What this dose is traininh your
brain to breath in cool air to cool
your brain.
When we stress our brain generate
Heat or ig feels like its hot as if we
Have a fever or higher temp.

 

[mrman526]

Research “Mindfulness” meditation you may find helpful information there. Also learn to laugh at stupid, embarrasing memories we all do stupid things. If we forgot them completely then we always make the same mistakes over and over. They are still not pleasant however. Even if you confront a memory it won’t magically disappear. However if you are really worried then you could get checked for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (Ptsd) or OCD, which both display symptoms of intrusive thinking and thought patterns. Hope this helps. Lonesome Crows advice will also help +1

 

[Lonesome Crow]

K....Now to creating positive thought and feelings
In the moment that will also be restored in your
Memories.
Surroumd yourself by beauty...
Flowers, art, music, laughters.
ALLOW yourself to feel good. Absorb it all in at
The moment. Experience it...dont anylize it.
If you a candi bar....taste the sweetness.
the texture , the smell.
If you look at a flower...notice all the beauty in it.
Smell the wonder sence. Feel the texture of
The flower...
If you read a funny joke..luagh. allow yourself
to luagh..
If you heat wonderful music..enjou it.
Dance if you feel like dancing....
Be silly...its ok.

 

[Sci-Fi]

I'm sorry but that's a stupid idea. Sure I have lots of memories, like you, I'd love to forget about. But they are something that happened, something that you learn from and have to live with. Trying to forget or repress a memory just because you can't deal with it, or don't want to remember it isn't going to help you any. You can't just "forget" about them anyway. Something may happen one day that will trigger those repressed memories, and it will be like you are experiencing them all over again for the first time. Best thing to do is to just deal with them, accept that they are part of your past and learn to live with them.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

K...now in your mind create an image of a triangle.
Or try to connect 2 dots...

Its basic or baby steps.
Its training your brain that you are in control
Of your creative process....our creative mind.
Disciplining our mind .
Your the master....not it.
think of your mind or brain as if its just
Another part of your bofy.

Control your mind or itll control you.

---

Im a musican....sometimes ill create melodies
or scales in my head over and iver again.
The scales i wish to be heard.
Then i play that same scale again in
Different tones or intruments...

Im the master of my creation.

---

How do thus help me?

That inter voice.....

I chioce what message to be played in my
Head. Positivr messagees aboit myself and
Life...

Im the master.

 

[roguewave]

I'm sorry but that's a stupid idea. Sure I have lots of memories, like you, I'd love to forget about. But they are something that happened, something that you learn from and have to live with. Trying to forget or repress a memory just because you can't deal with it, or don't want to remember it isn't going to help you any. You can't just "forget" about them anyway. Something may happen one day that will trigger those repressed memories, and it will be like you are experiencing them all over again for the first time. Best thing to do is to just deal with them, accept that they are part of your past and learn to live with them.

Sci-Fi, did you even read my original post, or just the title? Seriously dude. Not cool.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Shell shock or POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER.
FLASH BACKS....

People that havnt suffered from it wont fully understand.
Theres therapy or professional help.

If i tell a person when j get trjggers.
Then j totally dis engage from the presence rmoment
or reality for whatever how lkng ut last.
They wont understand..

Its a noying as fresia tk have thousands of
Traumatic events runs across my mind
Coming out of no where..

If yiure a musuc lover you might understand a l
illte bit.
Sometimes a song you have heard for years will jhst

---

Pop into your head. And youll hear that freaken song
All day off and on. Sometimes its a fucken disco song
That you dont like..but heard it on the air wave over
And over again becuase ut was a pop song.

Your negative thoughts or feelings works in the sameway.
Violent ir traumatic events.....

---

Example......

I witness my fiancee slashed her wrist...
Freaken blood everywhere. She screaming.
I see the flesh sticking out and blood flowing everywhere.

Well fresia..

That image will ppp into my head from time to time.
And i feel pains.
Sometimes when i lool at my own wrist, i feel pains.

 

[TropicalStarfish]

The funny thing about it seems to be that emotional traumas are so hard wired into the brain they become the hardest things to forget. Even funnier so is that upon forgetting an uncomfortable memory you don't ever remember forgetting, so you can't even ever be sure you've forgotten when you have.

My best advice would be, "out of sight out of mind." One could apply the simple complex in a vast assortment of ways. For example, moving away from a bad town, finding a a place to live that does not resemble anything familiar. If you lived in the city move to a country side, that sort of thing. The harder you focus on changing things, however, the more it might remind you that the change was made to try to forget, thus you remember you were trying to forget and can't forget.

As others have stated, time is the best thing. With time comes new memories, with new memories comes letting go of the old to make room for the new.

It would almost seem a bit funny to see a professional hypnotist to help you forget something. However, I do not know much about hypnotism or what hypnotists consider worth while endeavors, but I do not doubt the ease of something to an open mind. If it did work, there is the chance that eventually the effects of the hypnotism would wear off.

Most people it seems just stick with drinking alcohol regularly to help with this sort of problem, and for a great many it seems to work quite well.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Sci-Fi, did you even read my original post, or just the title? Seriously dude. Not cool.

Yes I did, and I'm sorry if you didn't like what I had to say but that's how I feel whenever I hear people talk like that. Before you take it as an attack on you though, I wasn't. I was saying the idea of doing such a thing is stupid, in general, I didn't say you, so don't take what I said personally. I was talking on the subject as a whole.

I'm guilty of wanting the same thing, I have memories that still haunt me and I think about more than I'd like to. I have to life with them, whether it was something I did, or someone else did, it's just something that is always there and always will be.

 

[roguewave]

Sci-Fi, did you even read my original post, or just the title? Seriously dude. Not cool.

Yes I did, and I'm sorry if you didn't like what I had to say but that's how I feel whenever I hear people talk like that. Before you take it as an attack on you though, I wasn't. I was saying the idea of doing such a thing is stupid, in general, I didn't say you, so don't take what I said personally. I was talking on the subject as a whole.

I'm guilty of wanting the same thing, I have memories that still haunt me and I think about more than I'd like to. I have to life with them, whether it was something I did, or someone else did, it's just something that is always there and always will be.

I didn't dislike what you had to say and I know you weren't calling me stupid, but I was surprised that you decided to call my proposition stupid. Especially after I even outlined the potential pitfalls of it in my original post. I wouldn't come on the board and call an idea stupid, regardless of how stupid I thought it was because there are kinder/better ways to respond. For example: "I think your idea is problematic because..." or " Your idea might backfire on you because..."

Basically, the point I am trying to make is if IRL you called someone's idea stupid (especially if it was of an emotional nature like it is here), it would likely be extremely alienating and that's probably not the impression you want to make.

 

[Sci-Fi]

After an issue I posted on here awhile ago was mocked I really don't care anymore. I'm just going to say exactly what I'm thinking. If there is something I think is stupid and that's how I feel I'm not going to sugar coat it. Why should I have to coddle people when that respect isn't always returned. If people don't like it, well there is an ignore function on this site.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Its also one of the reasons I kept
an open mind to various ideas or
Concepts.
Not everything works for me.
I had to find out or experimemt to what will work
For me.
Sometimes certain ideas will work
For me only to a certain extence.
The course in miracle helped me.
I learned from it but it became to
Difficult for me to use it after a while.
Which is ok.
I use the sedona instead of meditations
Today. Ive also worked the 12 steps.

We're not cookie cutter people.

 

[roguewave]

After an issue I posted on here awhile ago was mocked I really don't care anymore. I'm just going to say exactly what I'm thinking. If there is something I think is stupid and that's how I feel I'm not going to sugar coat it. Why should I have to coddle people when that respect isn't always returned. If people don't like it, well there is an ignore function on this site.

I see what you mean. I'm sorry you were mistreated here in one of your threads. One would hope that wouldn't happen on this type of board.
I guess the downside to taking the above approach is that it could squash potential relationships before they even get started. To be continuously respectful to others even when they aren't respectful in return means that you have to find a way to deal with their hurtful comments without feeling diminished. I guess that's what people mean when they say to "take the high road" or the path of non-resistance.

---

Shell shock or POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER.
FLASH BACKS....

People that havnt suffered from it wont fully understand.
Theres therapy or professional help.

If i tell a person when j get trjggers.
Then j totally dis engage from the presence rmoment
or reality for whatever how lkng ut last.
They wont understand..

Its a noying as fresia tk have thousands of
Traumatic events runs across my mind
Coming out of no where..

If yiure a musuc lover you might understand a l
illte bit.
Sometimes a song you have heard for years will jhst

---

Pop into your head. And youll hear that freaken song
All day off and on. Sometimes its a fucken disco song
That you dont like..but heard it on the air wave over
And over again becuase ut was a pop song.

Your negative thoughts or feelings works in the sameway.
Violent ir traumatic events.....

---

Example......

I witness my fiancee slashed her wrist...
Freaken blood everywhere. She screaming.
I see the flesh sticking out and blood flowing everywhere.

Well fresia..

That image will ppp into my head from time to time.
And i feel pains.
Sometimes when i lool at my own wrist, i feel pains.

---

---

That's a horrible memory to have to deal with. Triggers are the worst.
The song analogy is really good.