Hey Soup, I hope you won't mind if I share some more thoughts on our freedom. And I'm sorry that I can't express myself well in a short post.
You said we don't have the freedom to shape ourselves, and you appealed to the influence which is brought on us by our environment, society, genetics. And you claim that freedom is an illusion and that our choices from which we choose, are already chosen and presented to us without the ability to choose the other choices.
First, I want to point out the actual freedom about I'm talking about. When you say freedom, I get the impression that you think of it as an absolute freedom, and therefore reasonably conclude that there is no such thing. Really, I agree. I can't do everything, my environment doesn't permit it. There are some physical boundaries to freedom - for example I can't run my hand through the table without breaking it or damaging my arm. Physics don't allow that. Also if I wanted to fly without any machine, I would certainly fail. We do not have the capability to do it. So we are really not absolutely free. Same goes with social boundaries to freedom. They are so ingrained into our heads that we don't even feel them, and they certainly influence our behaviour and choices. Say I wanted to stand up in the middle of some meeting and shout out some private secret about myself. I couldn't do it. Say I wanted to go up to some stranger and kiss instantly. Insanity! So we're not free to do such things because we know that it's inappropriate, and this knowledge is not our knowledge, it has been ingrained into what we call 'common sense' or 'normal behaviour'. We modify our behaviour to these ideas, and it hinders our freedom.
Same with genetics. If I wanted to be a basketball player, but I was only 5"4, I wouldn't really have much chance. I'm free to do it, but the requirements for it do not allow me to fulfill my wish. Freedom is once again hindered. It is an illusion.
What I was trying to show with these examples is that our freedom is not absolute. First we recognize those barriers which can't be overcome. It's like being dealt a hand during poker. You look at the cards, and then freely decide how you will play. So the environment, our genetics and social norms of our time are just our cards in the game of life. We can't not play those cards, we can't change them.
But what we do WITH those cards, WITH that environment and genetics is completely in our hands. You were right that some freedom is an illusion. But what goes beyond the inevitability of our surroundings, genetics, environment is all in our hands. No matter what small amount of alternatives you have, you still have the ability to choose from them. If you desire absolute freedom, you certainly will be disappointed. We are not free to shape ourselves however we please. We can't rip out our arms and stick some wings in their place, if you pardon the bad example. We can't change our character and personality which has developed over time while under the influence of society. If I am a quiet introvert, it is highly unlikely that I will become an extrovert in constant yearning of social interactions. My genetics influenced my character as well, because I used to stutter, withdraw myself from contact with others in fear of ridicule. Once the stutter was gone, my character traits remained. So I was not free to change myself, even if I believed that getting rid of the stutter would totally change my personality. But what I am capable of doing with myself is an entirely different thing. I can choose what career to pursue (even if there are a limited number of choices, my freedom of choice remains), what ideas to agree with, what to value and what to frown upon. Sure, those things may be small, but that's what freedom actually is. It is making choices from what you have. You may expand your freedom if you are able to change the surroundings, give yourself more freedom, but it rarely happens - it is merely an exception, not a rule.
So really the illusion of freedom is not what you claimed, in my opinion. You say it is an illusion to believe that you can shape yourself. I say that it is an illusion to believe that you can shape yourself however you want. It is an illusion to imagine freedom to be either absolute, or nonexistent. What you stated in your last sentence was actually freedom - ability to choose from alternatives presented to us by environment, genetics, et cetera. But you made it sound like it's not freedom if you are influenced by something, that freedom is only absolute and if it's not, it's not freedom at all.
There. I really enjoy that there are topics like these in this forum. Really, interesting stuff. Even being able to present my views to people and have them read and even respond really alleviates some of the loneliness. I look forward to more thoughts on this topic.