Fixing an Annoyance

[AFrozenSoul]

You know from the sound of this thread I guess it sounds like I want to make a positive change in my life, but I fooled you and if that makes you upset then please leave.

So a bit of short history for some reason I answered honestly on the depression test that most doctors will give you when they come into their office. This resulted in what should have been a 30 minute doctor trip taking 90 minutes. The doctor offered the idea of putting me on anti-depressants. I shrugged off the idea, obviously, however, in hindsight, maybe I should have taken him up on that offer.

You see I am tired of my sex drive. Now I constantly read on forums about guys who are on anti-depressants and how their wives leave them because the male cannot perform sexually. Since I first started reading this over a decade ago, I cannot help but want those specific anti-depressants. I am tired of my sex drive. All it does is waste my time. All I do is look at porn and enjoy sexy females on anime and video games and on occasion "take care of myself". These days that is starting to annoy me. I do not give a crap about any of that.

I honestly have no desire to engage in romance or anything like that. I find romance to get an actual waste of time, which is saying something since my time is worthless. As such the problem of me wanting the ultimate benefit of romance, sex, is becoming a chore to handle. Aside from my physique getting in the way, yes I am very obese. It seems tedious all the time to need to expel that need.

Then I read online about how people are depressed about how the side effects of these anti-depressants ruined their marriages or their sex lives or whatever and I feel envy. I think how wonderful it would be to not have to feel that crap anymore. Then my mind wanders to "should I try and find those drugs?"

I know that this is self-destructive... but meh I am not using that part of my life anyway and a few extra bucks is a small price to pay to have one less chore or distraction from my life. Yet I am unsure how to go about this. i can assure everyone who reads this that I am not someone who wants people in his life. I want to be alone and keeping up any relationship is a chore I would rather not have. I actively avoid any social situation and put forth an effort to make myself an unappealing human so people are repulsed by me. I do my best to make sure that even my family hates spending time with me because I am so repulsive. To give you an idea of how I feel about human relationships

So I want to know is this something that would be considered self-harm? I honestly do not know, because at the end of the day how I act and live show me that this is something that could throw my doctors off my scent and fix an annoyance in my life. I am not sure what to think.

 

[TheRealCallie]

So are you asking if taking a pill for something other than what it is made for would be considered self harm?
The answer to that would probably be no. People take meds for things other than they are actually made all the time. Birth control for acne is just one example. Have you considered looking into natural remedies to lower your sex drive? I'm sure there's something out there that would help with that, but doesn't have horrible side effects.

That said, anti depressants do have other side effects aside from that, so you may want to look into it a little more before you take that option. Are you sure the meds won't help your depression? I'd say give it a shot, perhaps it would be a two for one to benefit you, if that's the case.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

So are you asking if taking a pill for something other than what it is made for would be considered self harm?
The answer to that would probably be no. People take meds for things other than they are actually made all the time. Birth control for acne is just one example. Have you considered looking into natural remedies to lower your sex drive? I'm sure there's something out there that would help with that, but doesn't have horrible side effects.

That said, anti depressants do have other side effects aside from that, so you may want to look into it a little more before you take that option. Are you sure the meds won't help your depression? I'd say give it a shot, perhaps it would be a two for one to benefit you, if that's the case.

I am indifferent about my depression. If I had not heard about those side-effects I would not have even considered taking the anti-depressants. Plus it will get my doctor off my back and I can return to lying about my mental health. The problem is how do I request anti-depressants that will provide me with that specific side-effect.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Easy, research them and when you go back tell them you researched them and ask for a specific one.
I do NOT condone lying to your doctor and it's not a good thing to do. However, considering you WANT to be on anti-depressants and your doctor wants you on them too, I don't see it being much of an issue. Pick one, ask on here or somewhere else for opinions and tell the doctor that you asked around (if you get good opinions) and it seemed to work well for others, so you'd like to try that one. That way you aren't lying.