Case
Well-known member
The title of the thread is a play upon the Simon and Garfunkel lyric, "Hello darkness, my old friend." This isn't about darkness as it is self sabotaging thoughts.
In about an hour after writing this, I will be expected at a smallish Thanksgiving dinner that starts at noon. (That's how we roll in America. Start eating at noon, a brisk walk at 3ish, pie at 4pm, and more pie, and then waddle my way back home. lol)
Anyway, here's how my mind works. I've known this group for maybe 8 or 9 years, but every time I see them, I have self doubts. My mind makes me feel like they aren't really interested in my presence, and would not miss me if I didn't show up. Which is crazy because people go out of their way to welcome me, but it's my self-sabotaging brain that cannot accept these nice comments as real.
So every year I go thru the same battle. Should I cancel? I never do, and at least one member of the group knows how I have struggled. The main problem is the anticipation of a social event. Sometimes, it's strong enough for me to beg off and avoid the event entirely. I've sought help in the past to rectify this, and while I am much less prone to canceling, I still have those thoughts, and it's simply a reality that I will be nervous beforehand and then fine once I show up.
Anyone else have the anticipation anxieties or pre-event nervousness that tempts you to avoid certain social contact? I'm curious. Be well, everyone.
In about an hour after writing this, I will be expected at a smallish Thanksgiving dinner that starts at noon. (That's how we roll in America. Start eating at noon, a brisk walk at 3ish, pie at 4pm, and more pie, and then waddle my way back home. lol)
Anyway, here's how my mind works. I've known this group for maybe 8 or 9 years, but every time I see them, I have self doubts. My mind makes me feel like they aren't really interested in my presence, and would not miss me if I didn't show up. Which is crazy because people go out of their way to welcome me, but it's my self-sabotaging brain that cannot accept these nice comments as real.
So every year I go thru the same battle. Should I cancel? I never do, and at least one member of the group knows how I have struggled. The main problem is the anticipation of a social event. Sometimes, it's strong enough for me to beg off and avoid the event entirely. I've sought help in the past to rectify this, and while I am much less prone to canceling, I still have those thoughts, and it's simply a reality that I will be nervous beforehand and then fine once I show up.
Anyone else have the anticipation anxieties or pre-event nervousness that tempts you to avoid certain social contact? I'm curious. Be well, everyone.