Holiday Depression

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I spend Christmas with just my brother and mum. No more or less people that are in my daily life already, but the day is just great. It was better when I got on with all my family, but I'm still happy without them. Even when my presents are faulty or delivered late, I'm still happy. It's the day after Christmas that gets me down, and then the countdown to next Christmas begins :p
 
I spent my first Christmas alone last year 2014. It was such a sobering but depressing experience. Totally alone, I cried, and sat in the dark in a trance state for hours. I already have anxiety just thinking about the possibly of experienceing the same repeated episode this year.
 
I am usually alone every Christmas and have made up my mind that this year, if I am still on my own, I will go to the Salvation Army for Christmas dinner. They put on a meal for people on their own. It feels a bit depressing to have to go to something like this, but it will be better than sitting on my own at home. And there will be others who are alone and maybe I will make a new friend or two.
 

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