Naleena
Well-known member
Life can bring about many unpleasant and unbearable experiences, leaving in their wake unforgiving and sometimes intrusive memories. How can we cope? Understanding the power of letting go can help. Here's how you can discover this awesome and effective healing tool.
Steps
Before you can get rid of haunting memories, you must come to terms with the origin of those memories. You can not let go of anything that you try to suppress. Suppression is not a solution, it is only a band-aid on the problem. Talking to someone about these memories can assist you in coming to terms with them. If that is too much for you to do, buy a journal and write it down. Writing can be very therapeutic. Really, all you need is a way to get your feelings about these experiences out.
Now that you have mentally cleansed yourself, you can begin to "let go." Letting go means that you allow yourself to understand that any experience you have had, good or bad, is not your fault. You can get to the point where you know that each experience you've had the opportunity to witness is meant to be a lesson to you. You were meant to learn something from the situation so that you could advance to where you need to be in this life. When learning to let go, internalizing this first point is the most important.
Decide what lesson it is you were to learn from the experience that produced the memory. There is always a lesson in everything.
When you define the lesson you were meant to learn, create a mantra on paper, that you can commit to memory. This mantra should include the experience itself, as well as what you have learned from it. For example, if you have a painful memory of abuse, your mantra can read: "Through the memory of being emotionally abused, I am learning to be a stronger person and I will no longer allow anyone to take advantage of me."
Take the time to sit with this mantra and let your mind grab a hold of it. Allow yourself to make the memory of your mantra stronger than the memory of the experience you have had. Repeating it to yourself frequently will accomplish that goal.
Next, take your mantra and put it in a safe place so that if you ever forget it, or the memories are still painful, you can return to it easily.
Lastly, allow peace to enter your being. When you are at peace, and calm has become part of your life, it very difficult for negativity to live inside of you. In order for you to let go, you must accept peace.
Try doing easy breathing in and breathing out processes, once you have relaxed try thinking of a happy place, or try focus on the one thing you want best. for example: think of ice-cream or candy, anything that will take these bad memories out of your head. If you are stressing so much try sit down and calm your self by listening to classical music this will sooth your soul.
Tips
Sometimes finding someone you really trust to help you through the process can be a challenge. Luckily, the internet is a safe place for anonymity. Use online forums to post your experiences. That way, you can still get the input of others and no one will know that it's you who is talking.
Warnings
If you do use online forums, please be aware that although it may be anonymous for you, it is also anonymous for other posters. That means that you should be careful about the responses people give you. You do not know them and so you should not jump to trust their opinions about what has happened to you. If you use this method, keep an open mind. This is only a way to get your thoughts out, not for people to judge you.
None of these steps will work like magic. You must take your time and let the process unfold. Rushing it will only make the problem worse and you will still feel like you have gotten nowhere. Remember that the problem or memory you had was in the past. And you have the present and future to live for.
Some painful memories (i.e., abuse) may not be easy to let go of just by using an online "How-To" website. For some memories like these, you may need a counselor or psychiatrist.
http://www.wikihow.com/
Steps
Before you can get rid of haunting memories, you must come to terms with the origin of those memories. You can not let go of anything that you try to suppress. Suppression is not a solution, it is only a band-aid on the problem. Talking to someone about these memories can assist you in coming to terms with them. If that is too much for you to do, buy a journal and write it down. Writing can be very therapeutic. Really, all you need is a way to get your feelings about these experiences out.
Now that you have mentally cleansed yourself, you can begin to "let go." Letting go means that you allow yourself to understand that any experience you have had, good or bad, is not your fault. You can get to the point where you know that each experience you've had the opportunity to witness is meant to be a lesson to you. You were meant to learn something from the situation so that you could advance to where you need to be in this life. When learning to let go, internalizing this first point is the most important.
Decide what lesson it is you were to learn from the experience that produced the memory. There is always a lesson in everything.
When you define the lesson you were meant to learn, create a mantra on paper, that you can commit to memory. This mantra should include the experience itself, as well as what you have learned from it. For example, if you have a painful memory of abuse, your mantra can read: "Through the memory of being emotionally abused, I am learning to be a stronger person and I will no longer allow anyone to take advantage of me."
Take the time to sit with this mantra and let your mind grab a hold of it. Allow yourself to make the memory of your mantra stronger than the memory of the experience you have had. Repeating it to yourself frequently will accomplish that goal.
Next, take your mantra and put it in a safe place so that if you ever forget it, or the memories are still painful, you can return to it easily.
Lastly, allow peace to enter your being. When you are at peace, and calm has become part of your life, it very difficult for negativity to live inside of you. In order for you to let go, you must accept peace.
Try doing easy breathing in and breathing out processes, once you have relaxed try thinking of a happy place, or try focus on the one thing you want best. for example: think of ice-cream or candy, anything that will take these bad memories out of your head. If you are stressing so much try sit down and calm your self by listening to classical music this will sooth your soul.
Tips
Sometimes finding someone you really trust to help you through the process can be a challenge. Luckily, the internet is a safe place for anonymity. Use online forums to post your experiences. That way, you can still get the input of others and no one will know that it's you who is talking.
Warnings
If you do use online forums, please be aware that although it may be anonymous for you, it is also anonymous for other posters. That means that you should be careful about the responses people give you. You do not know them and so you should not jump to trust their opinions about what has happened to you. If you use this method, keep an open mind. This is only a way to get your thoughts out, not for people to judge you.
None of these steps will work like magic. You must take your time and let the process unfold. Rushing it will only make the problem worse and you will still feel like you have gotten nowhere. Remember that the problem or memory you had was in the past. And you have the present and future to live for.
Some painful memories (i.e., abuse) may not be easy to let go of just by using an online "How-To" website. For some memories like these, you may need a counselor or psychiatrist.
http://www.wikihow.com/
