N
Nina
Guest
I just got off the phone with a woman I have been friends with for a good 7 or 8 years. I've been a reliable sounding board for her and always available when she needed emotional support. Lately, my own world has been getting messy and I've not once taxed her with any of it because anytime I try to get a word in edgewise, she comes back with, " that's nothing...let me tell you about my problem."
It bugged me more than a little, when my world, took a nosedive, that among all these folks I speak, text, e-mail and see on a daily basis, not a one of them wanted to hear anything about what might be bothering me. They've become use to me only listening to them.
I came HERE! One of the smartest things I've ever done too.
Today she started right in with what's wrong with her, hubs, kids and job. I listened. In the middle of her tirade it occurred to me that she NEVER even asks me how I am anymore...
When she finally wound down and was waiting for me to reply, I told her I thought she a selfish and self revolving person( I said a bit more than that but for privacy sake I'm editing). She gasped, said a few choice things and hung up on me.:club: I sort of feel a little guilty because I could have handled it a lot better but there is a part of me.....that feels **** GOOD that I finally did this.
No need for me to worry that she'll come in and read this though. She is pretty certain that she is the neatest thing since sliced bread and that the rest of the world simply doesn't know how to make her happy. That list would include the hubs, kids and her employer and fellow workers. She would never be lonely and upset...She raises the volumn, screams and demands more.
I'm always so laid back with stuff that this was a HUGE deal for me! I'm rarely confrontational but you know what? That might be changing. This site is helping.....I swear it's a few of you offering that open and direct advice that may have spurred me into this.
Growing a backbone isn't a bad thing.
Thanks for the words folks. Some of you may not consider yourselves..."normal" and I sooooo hate that word, but let me tell you some of the "normal" ones out there, can't hold a candle to you....
How many of you have had to do this? I'll bet a few of the mask wearers from the other thread have.....People see the smiles we wear and think "WELCOME" is written across your chest somewhere...
It bugged me more than a little, when my world, took a nosedive, that among all these folks I speak, text, e-mail and see on a daily basis, not a one of them wanted to hear anything about what might be bothering me. They've become use to me only listening to them.
I came HERE! One of the smartest things I've ever done too.
Today she started right in with what's wrong with her, hubs, kids and job. I listened. In the middle of her tirade it occurred to me that she NEVER even asks me how I am anymore...
When she finally wound down and was waiting for me to reply, I told her I thought she a selfish and self revolving person( I said a bit more than that but for privacy sake I'm editing). She gasped, said a few choice things and hung up on me.:club: I sort of feel a little guilty because I could have handled it a lot better but there is a part of me.....that feels **** GOOD that I finally did this.
No need for me to worry that she'll come in and read this though. She is pretty certain that she is the neatest thing since sliced bread and that the rest of the world simply doesn't know how to make her happy. That list would include the hubs, kids and her employer and fellow workers. She would never be lonely and upset...She raises the volumn, screams and demands more.
I'm always so laid back with stuff that this was a HUGE deal for me! I'm rarely confrontational but you know what? That might be changing. This site is helping.....I swear it's a few of you offering that open and direct advice that may have spurred me into this.
Growing a backbone isn't a bad thing.
Thanks for the words folks. Some of you may not consider yourselves..."normal" and I sooooo hate that word, but let me tell you some of the "normal" ones out there, can't hold a candle to you....
How many of you have had to do this? I'll bet a few of the mask wearers from the other thread have.....People see the smiles we wear and think "WELCOME" is written across your chest somewhere...