There have been times where I was on the verge of suicide. The last time was in early 2009. It's almost 2011. Yep, still depressed. Still empty of meaning for living. I try every day. I try to be myself, apparently I'm a prick. I try my best to be kind, & apparently that makes me a pussy. People don't initiate conversations with me so I try to do it, apparently that makes me annoying. I can't go on. I'm too stupid, too clumsy, ect. I always just wished that there was one redeeming trait I had that could allow me to keep going. Nothing. Apparently people really don't need me. & in all honestly people really don't like me. Idk why either, but even when I'm giving it my all to be a good person, to get on well with people, do good deeds. I still manage to be something people don't like. I feel cursed. I think I won't be around for much longer. I don't want to be. I've tried & tried. I suppose it's just fate.
It hasn't changed
- Thread starter Arnaert
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Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:
Arnaert-listen here -you matter to us-on this site. And you do have a good redeaming character. You were able to clearly sum up the crux of what you feel your problems are. Have you ever tried calling a "suicide hotline"? You don't have to give your name-they are there to just listen to what you have to say and can be benifical. Suicide is a cry for help in reality-I know I've tried three times in the past-after that I gave up so I know somewhat your are feeling and going thru. Please promise you won't do any thing silly. You may PM or email me -anytime I will take the time to listen to you for you matter to me as one human to another. Just take it one day at a time and one breath at a time. You're going to be ok cause you have a lot to offer this world of ours.
grainofrice24
Well-known member
Suicide Shmuicide. Quitter!
Don't give up...if you do, the world wins, and you lose. You said you try all the time...what did you try? Try harder. Don't give up. I felt like honeysuckle like you did for a while, but I managed to drag myself out of the gutter. Still a ways to go but I feel better. Try new things, try things that you know are going to suck but you know will help you. No offense to you, or anybody here, but a bunch of kind words are a small and sometimes unnecessary step. Decide to either make things better or die trying. Don't die without trying...that's pathetic. And you DON'T need help from some suicide hotline, or some greasy parasite that calls himself a "Psychologist" who charges you $10 a minute just to tell you some honeysuckle you already knew or could have figured out yourself if you just thought about it. Things are bad enough as it is, you don't need some prick exploiting your fragile condition as an opportunity to gouge you for whatever money you have left. If you really think suicide help line will help you then call. But psychology is a business, more than it is a place to make people better. There's my 2 cents. I have faith in you, let the psychologists kill themselves. You keep on keeping on. I would put more trust in someone who was smart enough to see that this world can be pretty cruel an cold sometimes, than someone who thinks the whole world is sunshine and rainbows and has more energy than a crack addict at 8AM.
Don't give up...if you do, the world wins, and you lose. You said you try all the time...what did you try? Try harder. Don't give up. I felt like honeysuckle like you did for a while, but I managed to drag myself out of the gutter. Still a ways to go but I feel better. Try new things, try things that you know are going to suck but you know will help you. No offense to you, or anybody here, but a bunch of kind words are a small and sometimes unnecessary step. Decide to either make things better or die trying. Don't die without trying...that's pathetic. And you DON'T need help from some suicide hotline, or some greasy parasite that calls himself a "Psychologist" who charges you $10 a minute just to tell you some honeysuckle you already knew or could have figured out yourself if you just thought about it. Things are bad enough as it is, you don't need some prick exploiting your fragile condition as an opportunity to gouge you for whatever money you have left. If you really think suicide help line will help you then call. But psychology is a business, more than it is a place to make people better. There's my 2 cents. I have faith in you, let the psychologists kill themselves. You keep on keeping on. I would put more trust in someone who was smart enough to see that this world can be pretty cruel an cold sometimes, than someone who thinks the whole world is sunshine and rainbows and has more energy than a crack addict at 8AM.
rosebud
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Nothing ever changes, at least not until you accept yourself for who you really are. You have no friends? "fresia the world if they can not adjust!" Try to succeed in areas that you might be good in, and leave the rest. If something is meant to happen it will happen. Put suicide out of the picture, it just end all, and you can't be sure that it will be better on the other side, no one has come back to tell us what is like, you know?
T
Tex Is Lost
Guest
I cannot tell you that I know how you feel. I cannot tell you that I have been where you have been. I cannot tell you that my words will help you find the answer.
But please don't give up. You were made in the image of God. I believe this with all my heart. You matter. There is NO ONE who is like you. You are unique and cannot be replaced. You have a purpose and the loss of you will diminish the human race. You may not, probably do not, believe this. But I say this...live.
I've posted this poem on this forum before. It's by Dylan Thomas,
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rage at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Hope this helps Arnaert
But please don't give up. You were made in the image of God. I believe this with all my heart. You matter. There is NO ONE who is like you. You are unique and cannot be replaced. You have a purpose and the loss of you will diminish the human race. You may not, probably do not, believe this. But I say this...live.
I've posted this poem on this forum before. It's by Dylan Thomas,
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rage at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Hope this helps Arnaert
