Just a friend?

[VanillaCreme]

Is anyone else always just the friend? I swear, every time, I'm always just the "cool/nice fat girl to hang with/talk to" but apparently never cool or nice enough to be with. I can be a *****, and a mean one at that. But I'm honest. Which leads me to believe that guys really do want lying, cheating, whores. :<

 

[Jesse]

I've always been just a friend. Every time I tell a girl I like her or ask her out I always get the just friends thing. The more I think about it the more I accept just being alone. It's not really that bad I guess. I mean I've tried as best as I can. Guess they just don't like me, but yeah, I'd never want a lying, cheating, whore.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

I have relationhip with females in my life that's always going remain just friends.

No , I don't want lying , cheating whores in my life.
No, I don't trip just becuase I'm in the friendszone.
I've had plutonic relationships all my life.

Yes, I've hit on some of my female friends and it didn't go anywhere.
Yes, I've falling in love with female friends and took the relatioship further.

Yes, sometimes I get to be that nice asian friend guy who's in touch with his moment
and we can just hang out.
Yes sometimes I get to be that nice asian guy who is in touch with her emotions,
mind ,body and soul.

Yes, there's been female friends that's been interested with me, but I wasn't avaliable.
Yes, some of my female friends I've been interested in that wasn't avaliable.

Rejection is not a good feeling when I'm going through it.
When I mellow out and step back a little bit or when my head clears up...I know there's
been all sorts of people in my life. I don't always get rejected nor I always get accepted.

I've made it a rule to never beat up on myself no matter what happens.
I'm also learning to not internalize what other think, act or feel.
Poeple can do and will do whatever it is they wish to do, no matter if it pleases me , is acceptiable to
me or not. That's just the facts of life...I don't have to like it.
People weren't put on this planet just to please me and give me what I want.
Acceptence of this is not easy at first or the second time or the third time. However when I do so..I'm free.
My self-esteem or worth as a person is no longer hinge on what other thinks or act.

No, I'm not a perfect human being. There's plenty of area in my life I can improve upon.
Through my experince in life...if I try to please other people, it dosn't have lasting effect.
It is when I do something becuase it was my decision. I did it for me. It's was my chioce.
That's when things has lasting improvements or change.

Sometimes I find it every difficult to change my thinking, behavior patterns...etc
I chose to belive in a HP/GOD of my understanding to help me. (this wasn't always the case for me)
It is also in this freewill , the freedom and the chioce I have at the every core of my being that establish
my self worth and self confidence.

It is also that same freedom that others have. To belive or not to belive.
It's at the basic or foundation level. I'm neither better than nor less than.

However...I am A child of god. No more nor no less than the moons and stars. I have the right to be here.
I have a right to live my life as I see fit. I have the rights to make mistakes...as many of them as I'll make.
I have the right to be happy. It is my herritage. A gift. Life is a gift. My life is a gift.
I don't have to earn GOD's love. If so...I don't have to earn other people's love either.

In other words...people don't have to like me nor accept me into their lives at any level...
It is thier chioce. They are free to do so.

I live with me 24/7s..No matter where I go , there I am.
I chose to love me today...no matter what.
God loves me no matter what...surely I can love me too just the same.

 

[Jesse]

Rejection isn't so bad when you get a yes every once in a while. But when it's always no, well that sucks pretty bad.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Rejection isn't so bad when you get a yes every once in a while. But when it's always no, well that sucks pretty bad.

Stop rejecting yourself,...this way it can't be no all de time...:rolleyes2:

 

[Jesse]

I don't reject myself.

 

[Nyktimos]

Is anyone else always just the friend? I swear, every time, I'm always just the "cool/nice fat girl to hang with/talk to" but apparently never cool or nice enough to be with. I can be a *****, and a mean one at that. But I'm honest. Which leads me to believe that guys really do want lying, cheating, whores. :<

There has been a lot of discussion here lately about what people really want from a relationship. It does seem that nice people get rejected, even by those who claim to be looking for someone nice. Oddly, love seems to play a part in this. I've spent a lifetime looking for someone nice, probably someone like you, but the only woman I've ever really, really been in love with, who I just can't get over, was a moody, often quite selfish, sexually driven pain in the arse who never seemed to know what she wanted (I ought to add I'm also a moody, often selfish, sexually driven pain in the arse). You can't control who you fall in love with (I don't intend to fall in love again). I don't think any guy wants a lying, cheating whore, but what we think we want and how we actually feel are two different things.

Have you ever been in love? Was it with the kind of person you thought you should love? How many guys you've known are nice, honest and generous, but you just can't see yourself falling for them in that way?

Everyone's different, though. You'll find someone who is a little more mature and knows what he wants and will love you for who you are.

 

[Naval_Fluff]

lol I'm ALWAYS the friend...it's pretty immasculating..something I think girls think of me more like a girlfriend than anything else -.-

 

[cheaptrickfan]

Is anyone else always just the friend? I swear, every time, I'm always just the "cool/nice fat girl to hang with/talk to" but apparently never cool or nice enough to be with. I can be a *****, and a mean one at that. But I'm honest. Which leads me to believe that guys really do want lying, cheating, whores. :<

Oh yeah. In college I was Buddy Girl. My male friends would pick my brains about what girls thought etc, and they'd talk pretty freely with me about stuff, but I was always a buddy.

This one time a few of us were watching The Hunt for Red October in a friend's room when two of the dorm bimbos stopped by to flirt with two of the guys. The guys were kind of dismissive with them (which only made the girls want to stay more...). When they finally left, one of the guys sat down next to me and said, "Man, y'know, they're hot and all, but they're so stupid; you're so much more fun and interesting to hang with."

Argh. Of course I'd had a MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJOR crush on him that entire year. ******* hell.

 

[Spare]

Is anyone else always just the friend? I swear, every time, I'm always just the "cool/nice fat girl to hang with/talk to" but apparently never cool or nice enough to be with. I can be a *****, and a mean one at that. But I'm honest. Which leads me to believe that guys really do want lying, cheating, whores. :<

Never compromise who you are for anyone. It may take more time, but finding someone who likes you for you is far more fulfilling than someone who likes you for a false persona. The wait will be worth it in the end.

 

[VanillaCreme]

The dude I was with was someone I could see myself staying with. ******* though he was, he was honest about it. I don't want a nice guy. I'm not really nice myself, I'm a *****. I wouldn't really want to be with a dude who was extremely nice.

 

[Just That Girl]

Don't worry Creme,
you're a Jersey girl
we're the best in the world.
=]

 

[Papabear]

i'm not trying to be mean, but if you are fat like you say, there is a chance that the guys aren't attracted to you. Unfortunately physical attraction is important in almost all relationships, even healthy adult ones.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Did anyone notice that beneath Vanilla's wolf in her signature it says that she has cookies.

And Papa bear's signature says " The things we do for cookies" .

I say we've found a match . You two should totally date.

cooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooookies *drools*

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Dont mind me, i'm getting this thread off topic. Carry on :3

 

[VanillaCreme]

Looool Sophia.

And my ex is fat himself. If he didn't like fat girls, then he wouldn't have been with me for 2 years, and I'd call him out if I ever heard he didn't like fat girls. He has no room to talk.

 

[Nyktimos]

i'm not trying to be mean, but if you are fat like you say, there is a chance that the guys aren't attracted to you. Unfortunately physical attraction is important in almost all relationships, even healthy adult ones.

Men are not nearly that shallow. We are all attracted to women in different ways. My girlfriend is fat, and nine years older than me. I found her attractive when we met, and probably still would if I didn't know what a spoilt nutjob she was. Unfortunately, in this case, physical attraction won't offset emotional repugnance.