Matt L
Member
- Joined
- Jul 29, 2015
- Messages
- 20
- Reaction score
- 0
Loneliness and depression has been with me for as long as I can remember. For the past few years I've been feeling like nothing matters and its affecting every aspect of my life. I've kept the same boring retail job for 4 years now because I'm too unmotivated to try something different. I'm too lazy and stupid for college and it'd just be a waste of money. I don't keep track of the money I make. The only reason I plan to move out is to get away from my badgering parents. I don't plan on anything for the future because I know my future, death. I feel like I'm bound to a fate of eternal loneliness and the only escape is death, of which I'm too spineless to commit myself. Its like I'm living a self-fulfilling prophecy. I just don't see the point in anything. I don't bother with trying to make friends because I have to initiate everything and they'd just forget about me. If the 1 in a billion chance happened and a girl was desperate enough to date me it certainly wouldn't last. No matter what I do, where I go or who I meet I always end up at the same point. The rare occasions when something positive happens to me, nothing grows from it and I'm back on the path of isolation.