I see no problem with cutting in of itself (not recommending it per se). I've cut myself out of boredom or curiosity before. I've done surface peircing rituals and such. Tatoos are an acceptable form of marking that date back to tribal days.
I don't think you are cutting or self harming, so much as, making a cry for help. If it's not something you want to be doing, or something that makes you feel bad about yourself, so, I hope you can find better outlets for your pain and suffering.
Although, I definitely understand it, don't judge it. However, some people see it as a bad habit that needs to be stopped. I think this only evolved out of other people's negative response.
When I cut, I wasn't looking for people to poopoo me and say, bad boy, don't do that, I care. I was looking for people to be shocked and awed.
I do get a lot of poopoo-ing and most people don't understand my scars, which is annoying, but for the most part, people are often in awe of them. I'm proud of them. They are my tatoos. I don't feel the need to express myself that way anymore, though. I suppose I have enough of them that the point has been made, and I've mellowed out a bit.
Can't exactly tell you how to stop cutting if it bothers you so much. I just sort of gave up on it over the years. Guess I grew out of it.
That's my 2 cents. Good luck to you.
Also worth mentioning, for me personally anyway, there was a narcisistic component to cutting. Looking at the blood, watching it leak out, etc.. etc.. No more narcisistic than a tatoo or something of that sort, but..
I mean really... If you cut yourself and use proper anti-septics to clean yourself up, your not really harming yourself... You will heal. What you are really doing is 'marking' yourself. 3 shots of whiskey is more self-harming than some cutting. It's just skin, it will heal. Brain cells you can't get back. It's all about what is socially acceptable in your culture.
My parents were pretty accepting of my cutting. They didn't like it, but, it mostly just annoyed them, having to take me to the hospital if I cut too deep, dealing with peoples reactions to their sons weird behavior and such.
A smoking habit is self-harmful. Cutting won't cause cancer, you won't die from it (unless you are attempting to self terminate by cutting major arteries). Cutting is a pretty benign behavior. The only thing that is taboo about it, is the marks it leaves, and the questions it raises, and the emotions it evokes in those who see your marks.
That's my take. If you want to cut, cut, who the fresia cares (just be safe about it, and understand that most people won't understand, and it might be hard to get jobs, and you'll be judged a lot, might be put into the psychiatric system if you are a minor, be aware of the consequences of marking yourself in a taboo manner). If you don't want to cut, but do, I find that weird personally, but, good luck changing your habit. We all have habits, they can be changed. Good luck.
