Porn is REALLY bad for you

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
Well if someone going for a PhD in a STEM field is not to be believed when they say porn is bad for you, then who is to be believed?

I probably don't even have the patience to read through the studies, myself, LOL. As I'd said before, moderation is the key with anything, but in this particular case I'm willing to rethink that a bit.
 
Batman55 said:
Well if someone going for a PhD in a STEM field is not to be believed when they say porn is bad for you, then who is to be believed?

I probably don't even have the patience to read through the studies, myself, LOL. As I'd said before, moderation is the key with anything, but in this particular case I'm willing to rethink that a bit.

My understanding of it:

The studies seem to have come about from a substantially large proportion of young males having erectile dysfunction and problems with partners as access to high speed internet came about. Then with all sorts of fMRI and goodness knows what they were able to find out that there was a new phenomena of “Porn-induced erectile dysfunction”, along with this they found changes in the brains grey matter that account for decision making.

As these men and youths began watching more and more porn, there was dysregulation of dopamine levels, and a build up of delta-phosphate-b, dopamine is the brains reward chemical and has to do with erections and orgasm. As guys start to watch more and more porn, the above process causes “desensitization” the more porn you watch. So in order to achieve an erection and maintain the same level of orgasm (reward) they start viewing weird or unusual porn, but after a while the same process goes on, so they started to look for more extreme porn. It was also found that the porn changed a persons arousal template, straight men looking at gay porn even though they were not into that in real life for example. During the same period they were finding this out, studies showed a substantial increase in the same age group (18 – 25) being arrested for the kind of thing that lands you on a registry.

Those who stopped found that their sexual functioning returned to normal as did their arousal template. However, for the unfortunates who had gone to the ultimate extremes, their lives were now over.
 
I didn't bother to read the study, as the link you provided is not a very reliable source. Not saying there aren't better sources that talk about the same thing, but I'm not going to waste my time reading an unreliable source about this, nor am I going to look for a better source.

As others have said, if you take anything to extremes, there will be consequences of it.

cumulus.james said:
However, for the unfortunates who had gone to the ultimate extremes, their lives were now over.

Lol, their lives are hardly over, just because they can't get it up. :rolleyes:
 
Watching a little porn and then jumping bones of partner when they see them - good.

Watching six hours of porn, while failing to feed small child breakfast or lunch while mommy is at work, so small child is starving when mommy gets home - bad.

Just an example. :D
 
TheRealCallie said:
I didn't bother to read the study, as the link you provided is not a very reliable source. Not saying there aren't better sources that talk about the same thing, but I'm not going to waste my time reading an unreliable source about this, nor am I going to look for a better source.

As others have said, if you take anything to extremes, there will be consequences of it.

cumulus.james said:
However, for the unfortunates who had gone to the ultimate extremes, their lives were now over.

Lol, their lives are hardly over, just because they can't get it up. :rolleyes:

Haven't just got that source mate, I've got the studies too (from my universities academic database), and you have misread. The ones who's lives are over are the ones who are, as I said, on a register.
 
EveWasFramed said:
Watching a little porn and then jumping bones of partner when they see them - good.

Watching six hours of porn, while failing to feed small child breakfast or lunch while mommy is at work, so small child is starving when mommy gets home - bad.

Just an example. :D

Everything needs moderation. *shrug*
 
EveWasFramed said:
Watching a little porn and then jumping bones of partner when they see them - good.

Watching six hours of porn, while failing to feed small child breakfast or lunch while mommy is at work, so small child is starving when mommy gets home - bad.

Just an example. :D

I think you get it :D
 
OP is correct. There is no argument, it's self-evident to anyone who's been through enough of this honeysuckle.
 
there is no hope said:
OP is correct. There is no argument, it's self-evident to anyone who's been through enough of this honeysuckle.

Extreme loneliness at times, coupled with the fact that I have no friends, no social life, am too scared to talk to girls in public. Trying to move out now - have the funds, too scared to ******* man up and go look at apartments on my own.

I go to porn as a way to treat my pain. It's tough. If I had my needs met in healthier ways I wouldn't need it. I'm wise enough to know that all of this is an excuse. But I'm also in a lot of pain.

As an adult, you just can't make excuses. You just have to accept what is, and live with it - or do something about it.

So I'm just going to say how it is. I'm scared to walk up to women and ask them for their numbers. I'm scared to even talk to women at times one on one. I consider myself to be very very smart, but I have a lot of fear.

I'm scared to move out. I'm scared of the responsibility of having to go and look at apartments on my own - and pick something that works. I honestly want this process to be overwith so that I can just move on with my ******* life and focus on other aspects that need help.

I have no friends. I keep a journal that now has over 300 thousand words in it. It helps with self awareness and loneliness. My people skills have deteriorated to absolute honeysuckle.

I'm good at my job. I do really well there. I often feel like my personal life is weighing me down.

Porn is something that just happens to me right now. It's just something that I live with today. I don't think I will live with it for the rest of my life. But it is a consequence to my unfulfillment. If my needs were met, it would be a lot easier to give this honeysuckle up.

One thing is certain, if I continue to stay in this place - porn will stay with me until the day that I close my eyes forever.
 
I think that in order to quit porn, it is like any other habit you want to remove - you have to replace it with something else. As one of my favorite motivational speakers, Kyle Cease, says: "You can't just have no cake". You have to replace unhealthy eating with something else, like the gym or running or bike riding. You have to replace porn with something else, not necessarily a boyfriend/girlfriend, not necessarily anything sexual at all. Just something though, something else that you want to do. Eventually you may find you are so busy you don't even think about porn anymore, and you really don't have time for it either.

I also think it helps you quit when you don't judge it. Don't say that porn is this horrible, evil thing. Don't feel guilty if you watch it. Just think of it as another thing that exists in the world. Neither good nor bad, but neutral. I think if you judge porn and judge yourself for watching it, if you say it is this terrible industry and this addictive vice that you have to use willpower against, then you only strengthen it. You clench on to it that much harder. You say it is bad, then in your mind it becomes this big, bad thing that you have to fight. But when you just say it is a neutral thing that exists and that you don't feel guilty for watching it, it has no charge. It has no power. You might even grow bored of it. And then you can easily let go of it.
 
I've watched a ton of porn in my time but got tired of it. Just ugly people engaged in a lot of nasty sex, it really made me hate people more.
 
TheSkaFish said:
I think that in order to quit porn, it is like any other habit you want to remove - you have to replace it with something else. As one of my favorite motivational speakers, Kyle Cease, says: "You can't just have no cake". You have to replace unhealthy eating with something else, like the gym or running or bike riding. You have to replace porn with something else, not necessarily a boyfriend/girlfriend, not necessarily anything sexual at all. Just something though, something else that you want to do. Eventually you may find you are so busy you don't even think about porn anymore, and you really don't have time for it either.I also think it helps you quit when you don't judge it. Don't say that porn is this horrible, evil thing. Don't feel guilty if you watch it. Just think of it as another thing that exists in the world. Neither good nor bad, but neutral. I think if you judge porn and judge yourself for watching it, if you say it is this terrible industry and this addictive vice that you have to use willpower against, then you only strengthen it. You clench on to it that much harder. You say it is bad, then in your mind it becomes this big, bad thing that you have to fight.

I'd agree... get out of the trough, find something better. Personal accounts from women in the 'industry' would suggest that much of the time, what goes on is borderline rape. What's on screen is quite distinct from 'two people having sex', and a lot more like eroticized domination/degradation.

TheSkaFish said:
But when you just say it is a neutral thing that exists and that you don't feel guilty for watching it, it has no charge. It has no power. You might even grow bored of it. And then you can easily let go of it.

The hold lies in the fact that it's sexual imagery, causing an adrenaline and endorphin rush that's addictive, particularly so for someone who's depressed and looking for short-term distractions.
 
So the drug companies have a habit of keep manipulating the studies they fund until they get result enough to get a licence, but hiding the negative ones.. ... In this case it is not that the scientific method does not work, i
t's that the wrong people employ it, manipulate it, abuse it and exploit it.

100% true fact
 
I'd agree... get out of the trough, find something better. Personal accounts from women in the 'industry' would suggest that much of the time, what goes on is borderline rape. What's on screen is quite distinct from 'two people having sex', and a lot more like eroticized domination/degradation.
Do be aware that the women who are victims of those types of scenarios are paraded around the media because it attracts far more sensationalism than the many, many sex workers who are completely healthy of mind in making the decision to do what they do, and happy with their work.

I do not mean to dismiss the experience of sex workers who have been abused in their work at all, but really, there's nothing to suggest that they are the majority. There has long been this attitude in society that women (and why only women? though that's a whole different can of worms) in sex work (be it pornography, prostitution, or what have you) must automatically have chosen that route because life gave them no other choice, or that they had been maliciously lead in that path, and that they need to be rescued from their plight. The reality is that a lot of people like sex, like sex on camera, like helping others achieve sexual gratification, and like getting paid for it. Recently, movements to clear up misconceptions about sex work have thankfully taken off.

As for the "your brain on porn" thing, this really seems to me to be a case of black and white thinking. One extreme or another. A glance through that website shows a ton of stories about how people supposedly regained their confidence, freed themselves of all depression, gained new goals in life, became more enthusiastic and charismatic etc etc... all because they stopped looking at pornography and masturbating. To be frank, I think porn and masturbation has been made into a scapegoat.. it's being talked about as if it's behind all ills in life. This is really common in a lot of contexts. How many times have we all heard "start doing or stop doing ____ and you'll get a soulmate, be more confident, attain all of your goals in life, be calmer and more focused..etc"?

I'm not saying that true addiction to pornography or masturbation isn't a problem. If that's all you do all day and all you can think about, then of course. But there is nothing wrong with having a high sex drive and getting relief. Having regular orgasms is actually really good for mental health, and preventing yourself from getting relief when you need it, well... isn't.

There have been a lot of points made pointing to a rise in access to porn with a rise in erectile dysfunction and personal accounts of people who stopped masturbating and looking at porn apparently feeling better in every way. We have to remind ourselves that correlation does not equal causation. There are a ton of other factors that are not being accounted for here. Could the rise of erectile dysfunction be related to the rise of extremely unhealthy lifestyles? Could the anecdotal reports of people who felt better after quitting porn be not because of the porn itself, but because the person made other changes in their life along with quitting porn? Could it be pure placebo? I can only speculate on the answers, but I can say that we need to be looking at the big picture here.

TL;DR It's more complex than it seems and I echo the "everything in moderation" stance.
 

Latest posts

Back
Top