She's coming over! Help!

[ThePsychologist]

Hey guys.

I don't really have anyone to talk about this, so that's why I love you guys <3

Let's have some background first.

So recently I have a girlfriend. It's been 3 weeks now. This is my first girlfriend ever.

During those 3 weeks, we went on 4 dates. On the 2nd date, we hold hands I tried to kiss her, we kissed for 2 seconds, but I think it was too soon for her or something else was missing. Almost straight after that "kiss", I told her I have no experience in this (I am still a virgin, never kissed a girl up to a few week ago). But she said she understood and everything seemed okay (I wish I didn't told her this though, I'm so embarrassed about it). But she did say that she never expected me to be this inexperienced.

After that, on the 3rd and 4th date, I this time asked if she wanted a goodbye kiss. But she said no. Don't get this wrong, I think she would not want to have a goodbye kiss because we where standing in a bit of a crowded street, silly me

One more thing I want to say about this before moving on: I seem to be too much in my head when staying with her. I'm thinking "Should I grab her hand or not?" "Is she enjoying herself?" - I personally don't want to grab her hand for example, because it just seems unnatural to me. So now I don't. Is that wrong?

--

So she kept bugging me about when we should meet up again. So I asked her to come over this Friday. My parents are gone and I will cook for her a nice dinner by candle light etc.

But somehow I'm scared. I like her and she likes me, but we are both very introverted and I'm just afraid that during dinner, conversation will become dry and we have nothing to talk about and nothing really to do afterwards.

I don't really know what to do. I'm just scared I might do something wrong. I'm trying to wrap my mind around, thinking if she wants to have sex or not. If I should try to take initiative after she seems comfortable in my home. We have not had any real sexual tension or anything like that (I think), but I know that she is interested in this.

And having all this being my first time having a girl over at home, with all of it's first time consequences for me, I'm just very very uncertain.

Just wondering about what you guy's thoughts are about this.

 

[Mary Mary]

How old are you?

 

[ThePsychologist]

22, she is 23.

 

[Ladysphinx]

I usually don't give dating advise but I'll and do so.
If you have the money I would suggest buying her flowers or one single rose. How well do you know her. If you know what intrest she has talk about that. If you don't know much of the topic then ask her about her intrest. Talk about what you want in life and what she want. Likes and dislike also can help a conversation going. The better you get to know each other the easier it will get. Don't try and sleep with her unless she indicates that she wants to, her having to say no could spoil a very nice evening. It's hard to say what you can and can not do usually girl will give small hint and body langage as to kissing making out that sort of thing. But she is introverted so my guess is that she's very shy. Holding hands should be okay. If you guys can dance put on slow romantic music. You don't need talking when dancing, which could make it easier. Don't wait to call her the next day, call her and let her know you enjoyed the evening ladies hate waiting for the phone call. If I'm wrong on these pointer pls corret me

 

[nerdygirl]

Relax before you make yourself sick! If you're spending all of your time stressing out, she's probably picking up on your anxiety. That's going to increase her own tension. You said she likes you. Give yourself some credit, allow yourself a little confidence!

If all you've had was one brief kiss, though, I'd be surprised if she wants to have sex with you on your next date. (It might be a good time for making out, though!) Figure out something to do before and/or after dinner, or things might be very awkward! It should be something simple but entertaining, and still at home. Like, if you go out to see a movie, you wouldn't have the same opportunity for intimacy that you would have if you snuggled together on the sofa and watched a DVD.

 

[Mr. Sir]

Make sure you're place is spotless. Have some incense to burn. Maybe some cannabis to smoke.

Here's a trick a PUA taught me but its kinda gay and it might not work but try it anyway. Have your mattress blank and your blanket and sheets folded neatly nearby, and when she comes into your room, start putting the sheets and blanket on the bed. It might work.

Also get some matchsticks and try out the matchstick animal trick. Good way to initiate kino.

Is she really your "girlfriend"? Like is it facebook official? Because if she isn't comfortable blaring it out to all her judgemental female council members on facebook, then chances are she doesn't consider it a relationship.

Since it's your 4th date, you should probably expect sex. If she doesn't sleep with you on the 4th date, or AT LEAST go to second or third base, it's a bad sign, and you need to start looking for other girls on the side that she doesn't know about. Keep her around, but look for other girls, because if this girl is attractive she can replace you with the snap of her fingers, and you need to be able to have the same power over her.

Women are NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER turned on by men that they have power over.

 

[Mary Mary]

Make sure you're place is spotless. Have some incense to burn. Maybe some cannabis to smoke.

Here's a trick a PUA taught me but its kinda gay and it might not work but try it anyway. Have your mattress blank and your blanket and sheets folded neatly nearby, and when she comes into your room, start putting the sheets and blanket on the bed. It might work.

Also get some matchsticks and try out the matchstick animal trick. Good way to initiate kino.

Is she really your "girlfriend"? Like is it facebook official? Because if she isn't comfortable blaring it out to all her judgemental female council members on facebook, then chances are she doesn't consider it a relationship.

Since it's your 4th date, you should probably expect sex. If she doesn't sleep with you on the 4th date, or AT LEAST go to second or third base, it's a bad sign, and you need to start looking for other girls on the side that she doesn't know about. Keep her around, but look for other girls, because if this girl is attractive she can replace you with the snap of her fingers, and you need to be able to have the same power over her.

Women are NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER turned on by men that they have power over.

Ayup

 

[Mr. Sir]

I usually don't give dating advise but I'll and do so.
If you have the money I would suggest buying her flowers or one single rose.

^ NO. You do the flowers and stuff when you are like 6 months into a relationship. She will think you are some kind of desparate, needy, weak virgin tool who is so excited that he finally has a girl show interest in him and she will be TURNED OFF. And then she'll tell this info to all her female friends, who will in turn do the same.

The young women of 2011 don't really seem into flowers anyway.

 

[Ladysphinx]

Nerdygirl has some great advise. You could let her pick the dvd, that way you'll know it's something she'll wanna watch.

 

[jales]

I liked the advice about the flowers from ladysphinx

but here flowers are expensive, if they are really expensive by you, I dont know.. but something nice and romantic like flowers could be nice.. it will let her know that you are really excited and interested in her..

remember women are just like men in that sense.. we like to know that you like us.

as for the conversation.. and what to talk about.. it will come naturally.. dont pre-think a conversation.. Just say what you think.. if you are nervous on the night...

talk about how nervous you feel.. etc.. also have a movie to look at with her ..for in case you all get bored.

Movie ideas..

The Kid. It's an old (1921) movie.. and you can download it online, legally for free as copyrite has ended on it.
Stardust was also pretty good.. if you all didnt see it. Or just pick your favorite movies.

But it is best to have the dinner and talk without the movie, but you can also offer a movie for in case you all get bored.

 

[Ladysphinx]

I usually don't give dating advise but I'll and do so.
If you have the money I would suggest buying her flowers or one single rose.

^ NO. You do the flowers and stuff when you are like 6 months into a relationship. She will think you are some kind of desparate, needy, weak virgin tool who is so excited that he finally has a girl show interest in him and she will be TURNED OFF. And then she'll tell this info to all her female friends, who will in turn do the same.

The young women of 2011 don't really seem into flowers anyway.

I can see why you need to go to a forum for lonely ppl as you are the type of guy I avoid unless I only want sex. I'm a female and know what I like and want. And keep a girl aside while looking for something better, that's no better than being a player. She could be the type that doesn't put out just because. If I have ever seen bad advise this is it. He dating a girl no a ho such as the example you tried to give.

 

[Mr. Sir]

Movie ideas..

The Kid. It's an old (1921) movie.. and you can download it online, legally for free as copyrite has ended on it.
Stardust was also pretty good.. if you all didnt see it. Or just pick your favorite movies.

I'm not trying to be an ass here, but is this a joke? Why would you want to watch a movie from 1921? Wouldn't it be a silent movie with a picture that was almost impossible to see?

I tried to watch Birth of a Nation once (1915), and I fell asleep because there were no words. Way too hard to watch.

 

[jales]

Well most movies from that time suck.. but this was a movie that my husband and I watched while on a date and it turned out really really really good lol.

The movie was decent but we also got to talk a lot during the movie and didnt miss anything....

I dont know.. I just have a good memory of this movie while I was on a date.

Anyway I doubt you would sleep through that particular movie. You should look at it.

Movie ideas..

The Kid. It's an old (1921) movie.. and you can download it online, legally for free as copyrite has ended on it.
Stardust was also pretty good.. if you all didnt see it. Or just pick your favorite movies.

I'm not trying to be an ass here, but is this a joke? Why would you want to watch a movie from 1921? Wouldn't it be a silent movie with a picture that was almost impossible to see?

I tried to watch Birth of a Nation once (1915), and I fell asleep because there were no words. Way too hard to watch.

 

[Mary Mary]

I agree with Socrates (for the most part). I know women hate it when I say this, but women are notoriously bad at saying what they find sexually attractive in men; but every man that dates a lot of women knows what I'm talking about.

You can ask women for advice on what to do for their *wife* or long-term girlfriend when the relationship has evolved from being sexual attraction based to emotional attachment based; but during the dating phase when sexual attraction is predominant, you should really take advice from *a lot of different men*.

---

I don't think a high brow movie like an old classic is a bad idea, but I do think he should pick a movie that either she or he definitely likes so that one or both can feel some excitement from the movie.

Well most movies from that time suck.. but this was a movie that my husband and I watched while on a date and it turned out really really really good lol.

The movie was decent but we also got to talk a lot during the movie and didnt miss anything....

I dont know.. I just have a good memory of this movie while I was on a date.

Anyway I doubt you would sleep through that particular movie. You should look at it.

Movie ideas..

The Kid. It's an old (1921) movie.. and you can download it online, legally for free as copyrite has ended on it.
Stardust was also pretty good.. if you all didnt see it. Or just pick your favorite movies.

I'm not trying to be an ass here, but is this a joke? Why would you want to watch a movie from 1921? Wouldn't it be a silent movie with a picture that was almost impossible to see?

I tried to watch Birth of a Nation once (1915), and I fell asleep because there were no words. Way too hard to watch.

 

[Ladysphinx]

Read all the advise but use only that that you'll feel comfertable with. This is after all your evening. If the idea doesn't feel rigth it won't work cause you won't pull it off. A little alcohol before the date will help you relax, just don't drink toooooo much that will be an disaster, 1-2 drinks will do but keep in mind if your planning on having drinks with dinner. Getting drunk is never good for a date.

 

[Brian]

She probably doesn't wanna fresia. But at least move on to something more. Don't be cheesy, don't be overly nice. Flirt with her, prepare some conversation topics to pull out. Be at ease.

But push the button after you do that, you're gonna do it anyway,

 

[LGH1288]

.
The timeless dilemma: "To flower or de-flower; that is the question." LG

 

[MrBurns]

I usually don't give dating advise but I'll and do so.
If you have the money I would suggest buying her flowers or one single rose.

^ NO. You do the flowers and stuff when you are like 6 months into a relationship. She will think you are some kind of desparate, needy, weak virgin tool who is so excited that he finally has a girl show interest in him and she will be TURNED OFF. And then she'll tell this info to all her female friends, who will in turn do the same.

The young women of 2011 don't really seem into flowers anyway.

That picture makes me want to facepalm forever.

 

[Mr. Sir]

@ Mr. Burns,

Yeah, it may make you wanna facepalm, but that's what the facebook photos of at least 50% of my female acquaintances look like, man.

It is what it is. You can play in the game or you can fold.

 

[Sterling]

Heh...that picture makes me laugh. I would never want to look like that -.-