Cathedral
Well-known member
More than a year ago, I was sitting in my apartment, suffering from a lot of depression and loneliness. Wasn't able to concentrate on anything productive. Just screwed up in the head. (I am 6 feet, 2 inches tall. And I weighed 215 lbs.) I went to a mental health clinic for treatment. They started to prescribe me meds. Innocently enough, I was prescribed a low dose of Adderall. I felt a high while taking that. But that wasn't enough. So my dosage of Adderall was upped and I was prescribed Zoloft. I have went through several different medications, like Abilify, Vyvanse, and Celexa. None of them helped me.
Today, I am sitting in my apartment, still suffering from depression and loneliness. Taking Serequel XR, Concerta, and Welbutrin daily. A few days ago, I put myself through three days of voluntary inpatient treatment at the mental health clinic. Didn't help me one bit. I just wanted to get out of there almost as soon as I came in because I couldn't have my cell phone and MP3 player and all of the other patients were junkies. I'm not a junkie. I knew it wouldn't help me before I went.
And get this, I weigh over 350 pounds now! I have gained more than 100 pounds in several months ever since I started taking these ******* pharmaceutical pieces of honeysuckle! I feel even worse than I was last year! I have given up on social interaction. I have given up on getting out unless I needed to buy groceries. And I'm about to give up on my future.
My biological parents didn't bother to raise me or even give me to someone who could. I was emotionally abused. I never got the help I needed, especially for my high functioning autism and ADHD that I was diagnosed with. Until the age of 17, I was just cooped up in some shitty old house in a remote place, 5 miles from a small town not worth a honeysuckle. The rest of the family just lied to me over and over again and never bothered to help out worth a ****. I was just set up to look like a spoiled brat, when I needed real parents to raise me and get me help to cope with the symptoms of autism. To keep me in school. To keep me on the right path.
Now look at me. Living on SSI which only pays $675 a month. In an apartment which costs 500 dollars, including utilities. I feel betrayed by everyone. I shouldn't be living alone, on my own! I was put out of the foster home I was in, I wasn't ready for independent living. I have special needs which will never be met. I'm mentally broken inside. I can't even properly interact with anyone on the Internet! Not that I ever was able to.
I never took any illegal drugs, I don't drink (I did drink moderately for a few months, but I quit that because I didn't like it), but who cares?!? Most junkies are way better off than I am! I almost feel like crying, even though I haven't cried in a few years. (actually, I cried once while I was in the inpatient unit, several days ago... alone!)
Before I ever got on these pharmaceutical drugs, I swore to myself that I would never take them. I was right all along! Gaining 100 pounds in less than a year! I was always a big eater. I could have ate fast food three times a day, every day, and not gain weight even half that fast!
More than one year ago, before the antidepressants and ADHD medications, I was better off! Better off than I am today! Not much more, but just saying.
Let me get this statement out:
Do not ever take any pharmaceutical drugs for your mental health! You will regret it!
I wish cannabis was legalized in the USA, but it never will be, because it's nothing but a bureaucratic and cultural wasteland resulting from corporate strongholds over the government and the sheer ignorance and stupidity of its citizens! A country who elected George Walker Bush TWICE and elected Obama is NOT a country worth living in!
Today, I am sitting in my apartment, still suffering from depression and loneliness. Taking Serequel XR, Concerta, and Welbutrin daily. A few days ago, I put myself through three days of voluntary inpatient treatment at the mental health clinic. Didn't help me one bit. I just wanted to get out of there almost as soon as I came in because I couldn't have my cell phone and MP3 player and all of the other patients were junkies. I'm not a junkie. I knew it wouldn't help me before I went.
And get this, I weigh over 350 pounds now! I have gained more than 100 pounds in several months ever since I started taking these ******* pharmaceutical pieces of honeysuckle! I feel even worse than I was last year! I have given up on social interaction. I have given up on getting out unless I needed to buy groceries. And I'm about to give up on my future.
My biological parents didn't bother to raise me or even give me to someone who could. I was emotionally abused. I never got the help I needed, especially for my high functioning autism and ADHD that I was diagnosed with. Until the age of 17, I was just cooped up in some shitty old house in a remote place, 5 miles from a small town not worth a honeysuckle. The rest of the family just lied to me over and over again and never bothered to help out worth a ****. I was just set up to look like a spoiled brat, when I needed real parents to raise me and get me help to cope with the symptoms of autism. To keep me in school. To keep me on the right path.
Now look at me. Living on SSI which only pays $675 a month. In an apartment which costs 500 dollars, including utilities. I feel betrayed by everyone. I shouldn't be living alone, on my own! I was put out of the foster home I was in, I wasn't ready for independent living. I have special needs which will never be met. I'm mentally broken inside. I can't even properly interact with anyone on the Internet! Not that I ever was able to.
I never took any illegal drugs, I don't drink (I did drink moderately for a few months, but I quit that because I didn't like it), but who cares?!? Most junkies are way better off than I am! I almost feel like crying, even though I haven't cried in a few years. (actually, I cried once while I was in the inpatient unit, several days ago... alone!)
Before I ever got on these pharmaceutical drugs, I swore to myself that I would never take them. I was right all along! Gaining 100 pounds in less than a year! I was always a big eater. I could have ate fast food three times a day, every day, and not gain weight even half that fast!
More than one year ago, before the antidepressants and ADHD medications, I was better off! Better off than I am today! Not much more, but just saying.
Let me get this statement out:
Do not ever take any pharmaceutical drugs for your mental health! You will regret it!
I wish cannabis was legalized in the USA, but it never will be, because it's nothing but a bureaucratic and cultural wasteland resulting from corporate strongholds over the government and the sheer ignorance and stupidity of its citizens! A country who elected George Walker Bush TWICE and elected Obama is NOT a country worth living in!