Unhappy where I am, issues with family, not sure what to do..

[EmptyFaces_EmptyEyes]

Hi guys, long time no post.

I’m between a rock and a hard place right now.. need some advice or opinions..

I used to live in Colorado, and was unhappy there, a recent event with a girl kind of pushed me over the edge into feeling like there is nothing left more for me in life. So, I decided to move to Arkansas with my dad, thinking a new place, a new start would be better, make me happier. Wrong. I find myself even more unhappy here, than I was up there.

I want to go back, but the thing is, they did so much for me here, including spending a lot of money. I have also been bonding with my grandma who I have not seen or known for 19 years of my life, and I’m only 20. Granted I can call/text her, and she has skype, so things won’t be so bad should I decide to go back. And, to top things off, my relationship with my dad is getting worse, not better. I don’t want to be one of the people who resent their fathers, and don’t speak/visit/whatever.

What should I do? I want to go back, but I would feel guilty bailing out on my family here after they have done so much. Should I not let that affect me, and try to focus on my happiness, my mental well-being, or..?

Any opinions, ideas, tales of past experience is much appreciated, thanks.

 

[Ak5]

Hey, that's a decision you should take.

But, if you were unhappy in Colorado, and still unhappy in Arkansas; chances are that you'll still be unhappy if you move back. Work on yourself. Find out what's making you unhappy. Also, if you want to fix your relationship with your father, it's best if you stay, IMO.

 

[Montreal Skye]

I think I moved 11 times in 8 years and it was to different cities, provinces and areas of Canada. At first the new start is awesome, but then like Ak5 alluded to, the unhappiness creeps back because moving around is a bandaid on what the real problem for your unhappiness is. I only started to feel right again when I decided to nest here for the last 2 years, I forced myself to figure out why I was so unhappy and what changes I needed to make to find happiness. It's not overnight though. You really have to take your time and think about what you want out of this precious life. I'll be moving again soon, but this time, I'm not running away from unhappiness.

If you do really feel the need to move though, keep in mind that you need to still figure out what's eating at you. If the only thing keeping you staying is guilt based on what people have done for you...it's just going to make the situation worse.

As for your dad, well, my view is tainted, I'd say run for the hills, but I don't know your situation.