what am i doing wrong?

[RoflLoller]

so i have been depressed for a while, being 21 and never had a girlfriend. i never had much friends either. so last year i decided to do something about it. i started talking to people in my classes at school and started making friends. i also started working out last summer which made me feel much better about my self, even though no one has commented on it yet. anyways the result is that i am no longer alone, i have friends now, and when i look at myself in the mirror i feel good. however, i still can't get a girl. i have absolutely no trouble talking to girls now (it used to be very tough for me) but every girl that i have been interested in have "friend zoned" me. so what am i doing wrong? i think that i have done very well, from being alone about a year ago to having friends that i can hang out with pretty much whenever they are free. so why is it that i still can't get a girlfriend? with valentine's day only a few days away, i am definitely going to be spending this year alone again, and this depresses me.

 

[floffyschneeman]

why do you want to get a girlfriend so much? getting a girlfriend for the sake of having one can end up in disaster. You might get hurt or hurt someone. Life can be fun too without a romantic partner, sure it gets lonely without having someone to smooch but you can work on a lot of things in your life like career, hobbies, friends, achieving goals, family, etc. the things you would likely take for granted when you have a girlfriend. And things come around when you least expect it, I believe that. It's like looking for scissors. They're always missing when you look for it. Chill and divert your mind and you will find it right in front of you.

 

[Code S.O.L]

Of course. The opportunity to have that special someone will only come around once we're at a point where we really don't want it.

Funny how that works out, huh........

 

[VanillaCreme]

It doesn't only come once. There's too many people on this earth for it to only come once for each of us. I thought it only came once for each of us, but I'm realizing that's not the case.

 

[Sci-Fi]

You have friends, and as long as you have at least one working hand(s) who needs a girlfriend LOL

Seriously though, like the others have said, having a girlfriend just for the sake of having a girlfriend is just inviting disaster into your life and unneeded heartbreak. Keep doing what you are doing, eventually someone will come along. Just let it happen naturally and try not to worry about it so much.

 

[RoflLoller]

i do agree with what everyone is saying about just waiting and just let it happen naturally. it's just i have been a bit bummed out lately with v day just around a corner that's all.

 

[SkuzzieMuff]

Well first, stop trying so hard. Women are turned away when you're trying to hard. Then, don't look for big things like that, be happy with what you have to be happy with, and more is likely to come your way. Don't expect anything in life, so when you get something it's a bonus. Then, find more ways to build confidence. Women are not attracted to men without confidence. Going to the gym was a good first step, but you need to do more.

It seems to happen when you're finally happy with the way things are, you'll find someone. Your desperation and loneliness is a turn-off. (Sorry to be so blunt) but I'm a girl that's had lots of male friends with this problem. I've seen it so many times, it's almost always the same issue. Or, you're aiming too high and going after snooty bitches.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Your not doing anything wrong..
Step up ur game into lover...
you know how to be friend women...now just learn how to be their.
Fiirt...learn how to flirt N tease women. Yeah dude...look @ women as a sex object to get out of the rut..eventually ur find a balance.

Screw what other women thinks about you being a pig and all that good horse honeysuckle...stop treating women ur attracted like theyre ur sister or mother. Women love it when you think theyre sexy and make them feel sexy.

And hve the attitude that ur a stud..
youll put out that vibe.

 

[Psycrow]

Good things will come to him who waits

 

[blackwave]

...or, they might not.

 

[RoflLoller]

well thanks for all the advice, i think im just going to chill for a bit and see what happens and not worry about it so much.

 

[Mr. Sir]

so i have been depressed for a while, being 21 and never had a girlfriend. i never had much friends either. so last year i decided to do something about it. i started talking to people in my classes at school and started making friends. i also started working out last summer which made me feel much better about my self, even though no one has commented on it yet. anyways the result is that i am no longer alone, i have friends now, and when i look at myself in the mirror i feel good. however, i still can't get a girl. i have absolutely no trouble talking to girls now (it used to be very tough for me) but every girl that i have been interested in have "friend zoned" me. so what am i doing wrong? i think that i have done very well, from being alone about a year ago to having friends that i can hang out with pretty much whenever they are free. so why is it that i still can't get a girlfriend? with valentine's day only a few days away, i am definitely going to be spending this year alone again, and this depresses me.

YAHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The fact that you've already accepted your problem with girls and done what I bolded means that you are already 50% of the way there. The fact that you are taking your problem by the balls means that you are already MUCH MUCH MUCH better off than the people who think its about "being yourself" or "waiting for the right person to come along!"

Don't worry about spending Valentine's Day alone, it's a bullshit holiday that the corporations have blown out of proportion to sell products. No big ******* deal.

It's a long track from being a straight loner to being a stud. It's not easy for anyone to do. PM me immediately with your workout plan so I can see if you're doing the right stuff. But just the fact that you've decided to man up and wrangle your situation has earned my respect, and I am willing to help you on your dark and dangerous trail. Just PM and I can answer any questions.

Also, for the meantime, just think of the gym as your girlfriend. Just fill in the girlfriend void with the gym. The fastest and easiest way.

 

[Poueff]

so i have been depressed for a while, being 21 and never had a girlfriend. i never had much friends either. so last year i decided to do something about it. i started talking to people in my classes at school and started making friends. i also started working out last summer which made me feel much better about my self, even though no one has commented on it yet. anyways the result is that i am no longer alone, i have friends now, and when i look at myself in the mirror i feel good. however, i still can't get a girl. i have absolutely no trouble talking to girls now (it used to be very tough for me) but every girl that i have been interested in have "friend zoned" me. so what am i doing wrong? i think that i have done very well, from being alone about a year ago to having friends that i can hang out with pretty much whenever they are free. so why is it that i still can't get a girlfriend? with valentine's day only a few days away, i am definitely going to be spending this year alone again, and this depresses me.

YAHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The fact that you've already accepted your problem with girls and done what I bolded means that you are already 50% of the way there. The fact that you are taking your problem by the balls means that you are already MUCH MUCH MUCH better off than the people who think its about "being yourself" or "waiting for the right person to come along!"

Don't worry about spending Valentine's Day alone, it's a bullshit holiday that the corporations have blown out of proportion to sell products. No big ******* deal.

It's a long track from being a straight loner to being a stud. It's not easy for anyone to do. PM me immediately with your workout plan so I can see if you're doing the right stuff. But just the fact that you've decided to man up and wrangle your situation has earned my respect, and I am willing to help you on your dark and dangerous trail. Just PM and I can answer any questions.

Also, for the meantime, just think of the gym as your girlfriend. Just fill in the girlfriend void with the gym. The fastest and easiest way.

A felow alpha in the making is he? fresia the gym,you only need to do 3 extreme work out sections per week (like I do) to grow to be a cardio beast.

Besides,if he treated the gym like his girlfriend he'd be sued for blowing his load in the treadmill and that'd fresia up all of his plans

PS- What happened to your old siggy? That gave me hours of fun (non-perv)

 

[Mr. Sir]

Hey man, tell me about your 3 day plan, Poeff.

 

[Poueff]

Hey man, tell me about your 3 day plan, Poeff.

It isn't a three day plan,it's like a weekly routine.

Gonna post an example...

-2/3 Intense and at least 2 hour long sports (I am with VoleyBall and Squash)
-1 day swimming or doing some muscle relaxing activity like sauna or turk bath
-Regulate eating - Only eat chicken and turkey as meat,eat a lot of fish and salads. Side Note - Sodas fresia everything

And that's that,I've been playing squash since I was 11 and been playing VoleyBall for some months now and I particulary chose them both because Voley makes people bigger with all the jumping,stretching and spine stretching and Squash is just an intense as fresia game that works the legs/thights a lot... my ass is still big as hell though,it has to be one of the only things I hate about my body. I know it helps in sprinting (been doing official competitions at school and district-wise) and with jumping in voleyball but having a big but is a pain in the ass... literaly

 

[VanillaCreme]

Working out doesn't solve all problems. You think you're all buff and hot stuff, and you still have issues with dating... So what does that say... Work on how you treat people and you might get somewhere.

 

[RoflLoller]

i work out simply because i want to stay in shape. it also clears my mind and make me think better. if people are interested in what my routine is here it is (im probably forgetting a few things lol):

Mondays- chest - 75 push ups (real push ups, elbows bent 90 degrees), 3 sets of chest flys, 3 sets of chest presses, 3 sets of press from the hips
Tuesdays- back/ cardio - 40 pull ups, 3 sets of bent over rows, 3 sets of one arm row (3 sets each arm), run until i don't want to anymore
Wednesdays - shoulders - shrugs, 3 sets of dumbbell side and front raises, 3 sets of military press
Thursdays - arms - bicep curls, dips, dumbbell kickbacks, hammer curls, tricep french press
Fridays - abs/ cardio - bicycle crunch, reverse crunch, hanging leg raises, v ups, oblique crunches, run til i don't want to anymore
Saturday/Sunday - rest (i work at my part time job, which involves heavy lifting so i need to chill!)

again i workout simply because i want to stay in shape. i am a very small guy, doctors have said i am under weight and i am working out and eating healthily to gain weight. i have noticed a huge difference in the way i look and how i perform in physical activities such as basketball, but so far no girls have commented on it yet. i am toned, not ripped, which is all i want. personally, me working out have never been part of my "trying to make new and more friends and try to get a girlfriend" plan. i do it because i enjoy it.