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  1. K

    Exploring my options

    I take painkillers which take the edge off but the pain is always there. I wouldn't claim as intense all the time, but if it's not a discomfort it's a constant ache, akin to a glowing ember burning in my back. I was initially on 180mg daily of Oxycontin which I chose to detox off years ago as...
  2. K

    Exploring my options

    I've talked to my doctors. That's not so much the issue.....it's not that chemo is a success or isn't, in my case it's working. I'm simply at the end of my rope with it. It's their job to advocate treatment so there's not much I can ask them that I don't already know. As for support groups...
  3. K

    Exploring my options

    Don't know if this belongs in the depression boards or not (if not, please move to relevant area mods, thx), as I'm not quite depressed, or perhaps it's become such a state of normalcy as to be indiscernible. Either way. I'm approaching my 38th birthday on the 22nd. I'm very chronically ill...
  4. K

    What hope do I have?

    I'll look her up, thanks for the recco. Any help helps. At my age, women are looking mostly to find someone they can nest down with and lay eggs, or at the very least, be independent. There are many things that they feel should be required of the male......namely, being able to support them...
  5. K

    What hope do I have?

    I'm in a hopeless situation and one I feel that I can't help but resign myself to the fact that loneliness will forever be my constant companion. I have a serious health issue that has me fated to go through weekly chemotherapy for the rest of my life. It's to control a tumor in my chest...
  6. K

    This is destroying my life

    Never done acupuncture. I've seen enough needles to last 100 lifetimes. Yes, I've gone to a counselor numerous times and they all say online courses. As for hobbies, gaming mostly as it helps take my mind off of the unpleasantness of chemo side effects. I also like movies and reading and...
  7. K

    This is destroying my life

    Therapy, I go to the gym on and off (depending on my motivation, energy, and the severity of my symptoms) and do 45 on the elliptical which makes me feel incredible for about 2 hours after, I'm trying to eat better, and I'm on meds which help with my Bipolar II. I do go out to art festivals and...
  8. K

    This is destroying my life

    Well I can't seem to play them correctly, and it's not from lack of trying or desire. I've been in therapy since 15. Flash cards, CBT, self-affirmations....nada. I've never had more desire, and that's the problem. I cannot fix this no matter how hard I want or what I try.
  9. K

    This is destroying my life

    Thanks. There's medical pot here, but being Hawaii nobody cares what kind unless your yard is a growing field. Even then green harvest simply takes it with no charges. Pot helps symptoms wise but it makes me paranoid. I'll check out the chat.
  10. K

    This is destroying my life

    I'm at the end of my rope. My self-esteem and confidence issues are utterly destroying my life and I don't know what to do. Firstly, let me give some background info about myself and what I believe has had the biggest impact on my life so far that has led up to this point. At 20 I was...
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