My loneliness problem...long story

Okay, here is my story. I graduated college and moved 2 and a half hours away from my family to take a teaching job. I thought I would be fine, I mean I already lived 2 hours away for college, but let's face it, college life for the most part is full of people. I went from having 3 other roommates and people over to, living on my own with my dog and cat.

At first it was cool, I got to run my home they way I wanted, but now it sucks. It's not like I haven't tried to make new friends, it's harder in the "real world", where college was easy. I have tried going to sporting events at the high school I teach at, going to church, doing yoga after school, and internet dating to meet people and get at least a friend to hang out with. None of it is working for me, and I have lived here for about 8 months now.

To top things off, I really don't think teaching is for me. So, I am actually looking to get a job in the agriculture industry. The jobs I am looking at are closer to home, so I think being around my family would help.

This whole college to real life transition is just not going well for me, and I really just need to get through these next 5 months of teaching.

Thanks, for reading.

Hey, I have about another 5 months of teaching too before I quit and try looking for something else.

I don't really have anything great to say but I hope you don't give up trying and just keep moving ahead and reach for what makes you happy. I'd say that switching your career to something you are more interested in is a good first step.

All the best and hope things work out for you.

Thanks! I really just had a great talk with my dad about steering my life to where I want it. I think I'm going doing well in that aspect. It's just the journey of this school year is going to be rocky.

I somewhat feel bad for wanting to quit teaching, but I really think it's not for me. I want to have another job to go to though before the end of the school year.

So you could find any friends at work or yoga? It might sound counterproductive but maybe try finding an out-going guy friend who can introduce you to the social scene around there. Maybe even a married friend can help, he might introduce you to some single ladies his wife is begging him to find "good" friends for.

Nicolelt said:

Thanks! I really just had a great talk with my dad about steering my life to where I want it. I think I'm going doing well in that aspect. It's just the journey of this school year is going to be rocky.

I somewhat feel bad for wanting to quit teaching, but I really think it's not for me. I want to have another job to go to though before the end of the school year.

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just do what you want to try while you are young, never know where it will take you.
have a free spirit dont doubt yourself.
louise

Anten said:

So you could find any friends at work or yoga? It might sound counterproductive but maybe try finding an out-going guy friend who can introduce you to the social scene around there. Maybe even a married friend can help, he might introduce you to some single ladies his wife is begging him to find "good" friends for.

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That's an idea. I have one friend at work, and we hang out sometimes.

ventura23 said:

just do what you want to try while you are young, never know where it will take you.
have a free spirit dont doubt yourself.
louise

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That's what I'm working on. Job searching is frustrating at the moment. I am just miserable teaching. I wish I could quit now.

Nicolelt says -- I somewhat feel bad for wanting to quit teaching, but I really think it's not for me.

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Well no job suits everyone, and it's good that you have found out you don't like teaching sooner rather then later. It would be soul-destroying wasting years in a job you hate, and in teaching - not too good for the students either. I'm sure all of us can remember teachers whose attitude was horrible after years doing a job they just were not suited for!

But just to be sure - a little note of caution. Just check with yourself that you really don't like teaching, or is it because you are lonely you are concentrating too much on the stuff you don't like about it? It's really easy when you are on your own a lot to let the everyday crappy stuff get on top of you, and that can happen with any job - even one you like - there will always be something that is less appealing but has to be done (usually the paperwork - yuk).

Just saying this as it could be a mistake to switch careers then find out you feel the same in a new line of work.

Oh yea, I have been round and round with emotions on changing. I had a really great day once, and my mentor teacher told me too write down the pros and cons of teaching and taking another job. With teaching the pros and cons were even, which did surprise me. The other jobs, had the pros outweighing the cons though.

And this was on a good day teaching, which are not often.

The other jobs, had the pros outweighing the cons though

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Ok. I was just wanting you to be sure that you had considered all of this, and it sounds like you have been doing so, which is very mature of you. It's just a shame that you have not had many good days in your teaching experience, because I get the feeling that actually you might be quite good at it, given that you are new to it and practice, as they say, makes perfect! ! Sounds like your mentor might be thinking so as well? I will say though, that maybe the pros outweighing the cons in other jobs are based on what you think they might be like, rather than what they actually will be like? So in some respects that takes them down a notch or two compared to the job you have now...

But look, in the end it is all up to you, and you know yourself better than other people do. But one thing that my beloved (late) mother used to say, and which years of living have taught me to be quite true, its this ... If in doubt - do nothing. At least until you truly know your mind on this. And if you do, well, the answer is easy.