Anyone here in a healthy relationship?

I want to know what it's like so that I might know what to look for. What is it like? How did it happen for you? Is it really better than being single? Why?

Thanks

Good question

I have a few healthy friendships with some good friends but nothing romantically involved.

It's good. You can be yourself. They don't need anything from you. You don't need anything from them. BUT if someone did really need help the other would be there. You don't have to hang out all the time or talk all the time, but when you do meet up, it's really nice.

Nothing turns me off faster than a friend that needs a lot of favors. Even if they can/want to pay me back. I don't need it. I can take care of the basics myself. I know you're true if we can hang out and I know you don't want anything from me other than my company.

It's probably a similar feeling for being in a romantic relationship.

I used to drink very heavily until i found love. Me and my bf have been together for 22 years. i think its all about sacrifices.

No healthy romantic relationship(s).
No healthy friendships.
No healthy relationship with myself.

Fail x3

Just as the first line of my signature says...

what vegan said

Well I know what it's like to have friends somewhat. It's great to have those individuals that you can truly trust and they will be there for you without wanting anything in return. (having an ulterior motive) It can be great when you haven't seen them for a while because when you do it feels like no time has passed at all since you last saw each other. I need to friends to be there for me for me to actually feel like they care and I don't like to be the one that always has to make the effort.

Romantic relationships are great too, however I haven't been in one for 6 years so I do miss it. I wish that a woman would love me for me, but I think that I need to love and take care of myself first which is what I'm doing.

I think healthy relationships, regardless of them being romantic or platonic, are based on compromise, trust and respect. Your friends and/or partner should be trustworthy, make you feel good about yourself and be willing to forgive you for your flaws and mistakes. There will be plenty of arguments/fights/issues, but if beyond all that you can feel all those positive things and you feel pretty happy with them say 80% of the time, then its a pretty healthy relationship I think.

I have been in toxic romantic relationships though and for me personally, I think its better to be single than to be with the wrong person. At least being single means only being lonely but being with someone who puts you down constantly, that's being lonely, miserable AND feeling terrible about yourself . If you're single, you can still make friends, do great things in life, adopt a child or animals, but being in a toxic relationship can really make hope feel like a faraway thing.

Can't say that I am, and mainly because my guy doesn't know how to have a healthy relationship with anyone.

johnny196775 said:

I used to drink very heavily until i found love. Me and my bf have been together for 22 years. i think its all about sacrifices.

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I'm happy that you are healthier now. Besides the drinking, what kind of sacrifices? Do you think those other sacrifices are worth it/not at a huge detriment to you?

choxie said:

johnny196775 said:

I used to drink very heavily until i found love. Me and my bf have been together for 22 years. i think its all about sacrifices.

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I'm happy that you are healthier now. Besides the drinking, what kind of sacrifices? Do you think those other sacrifices are worth it/not at a huge detriment to you?

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I think what you are willing to sacrifice is completely subjective.

For me, I don't require common interest (it would be super awesome if we had common interest, who wouldn't want that?), though I do require that we are able to be in the same room together doing our own things without problems. I also require that just because we don't share the same interest, that she doesn't just brush off my interest and never talk about it. As I would still be engaged in things that she finds interesting when it is not one of my interests if she wanted to talk about it, or show me something.

VeganAtheist said:

No healthy romantic relationship(s).
No healthy friendships.
No healthy relationship with myself.

Fail x3

Just as the first line of my signature says...

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I have one healthy friendship in real life. But nothing else. And I can guarantee I have a far worse relationship with myself, than you!

Batman55 said:

I have one healthy friendship in real life. But nothing else. And I can guarantee I have a far worse relationship with myself, than you!

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Quite possibly. I hope that relationship improves. The relationship with yourself is the most important one... you are stuck with it for the rest of your life.

Veruca said:

I think healthy relationships, regardless of them being romantic or platonic, are based on compromise, trust and respect. Your friends and/or partner should be trustworthy, make you feel good about yourself and be willing to forgive you for your flaws and mistakes. There will be plenty of arguments/fights/issues, but if beyond all that you can feel all those positive things and you feel pretty happy with them say 80% of the time, then its a pretty healthy relationship I think.

Click to expand...

kamya said:

I have a few healthy friendships with some good friends but nothing romantically involved.

It's good. You can be yourself. They don't need anything from you. You don't need anything from them. BUT if someone did really need help the other would be there. You don't have to hang out all the time or talk all the time, but when you do meet up, it's really nice.

Nothing turns me off faster than a friend that needs a lot of favors. Even if they can/want to pay me back. I don't need it. I can take care of the basics myself. I know you're true if we can hang out and I know you don't want anything from me other than my company.

It's probably a similar feeling for being in a romantic relationship.

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What I've quoted above basically what I feel are the things that can be found in a healthy relationship.

I believe I am in a healthy relationship right now. He has probably seen the worst of me, my ugliest moments and he's still there, loves me just as much. I get upset about stupid things but I never not cared about him.

A healthy relationship is probably one without pressure to do something you don't want to, but more guidance and support to be led the right way. And even if you still choose the alternative that ends up unfavourably, it's where your partner will still be there for you to cushion the pain. One where it makes you a better person for yourself, and for your partner. One that changes you for the better.

Of course, one where honesty, loyalty and sincerity is of utmost importance (to me, at least) as well.