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WallflowerGirl83
Guest
I've been trying to keep it together, I go to the doctor and I visit with my therapist to talk about my feelings and both things have been helping. The last two months have been going horrible for me. Christmas was lonely as ever, my family didn't do anything. All we did was have carry out Chinese food and the most of the day I spent inside my bedroom feeling sad cause we were supposed to go to the movies but instead we didn't go. New Years was rough on me cause I didn't have anyone around me, I didn't drink. I actually gave up drinking and I have no friends to really hang out with. Than this month I've been constantly deleting people off of my Facebook and Skype cause people don't talk to me any longer. I guess we grew apart or something has changed, even including people who I met off of the Forum. They told me that they would always talk to me and keep in contact with me but they also have been ignoring me.
I've been avoiding Facebook all together cause it depresses me cause nobody sends me messages any longer. I'm so faithful to everyone but everyone around me always ends up disappearing. A few nights ago I was feeling really sad and I saw my father's pain pills and I took three of them cause I wanted to numb out the sadness that I've been feeling. I know it's stupid that I did that, but I just feel like I'm no longer cared about anymore. I visited my therapist this week and I told her about it and I told her how I'm still not completely over getting abused by my ex boyfriend. I feel like I'm almost over it, but I'm still angry about him abusing me. Feel horrible for not going to the police about him raping me but I feel like it's a little bit too late now. I'm actually scared to tell them all the details cause I don't want to go through the court proceedings. I'm glad I didn't have to go through it when my father sexually molested me but I won't go through this with my ex boyfriend. I rather have him out of my life for good and that's what I've gotten. I'm sorry for all the ranting away, but I'm not in a good place right now and I needed to get this all of my chest.
I've been avoiding Facebook all together cause it depresses me cause nobody sends me messages any longer. I'm so faithful to everyone but everyone around me always ends up disappearing. A few nights ago I was feeling really sad and I saw my father's pain pills and I took three of them cause I wanted to numb out the sadness that I've been feeling. I know it's stupid that I did that, but I just feel like I'm no longer cared about anymore. I visited my therapist this week and I told her about it and I told her how I'm still not completely over getting abused by my ex boyfriend. I feel like I'm almost over it, but I'm still angry about him abusing me. Feel horrible for not going to the police about him raping me but I feel like it's a little bit too late now. I'm actually scared to tell them all the details cause I don't want to go through the court proceedings. I'm glad I didn't have to go through it when my father sexually molested me but I won't go through this with my ex boyfriend. I rather have him out of my life for good and that's what I've gotten. I'm sorry for all the ranting away, but I'm not in a good place right now and I needed to get this all of my chest.