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An observation about some people on this forum
#11
The one thing that makes me angry is when people hand out advice of lazily repeated societal norms/prejudices/gender roles in a 'that's just the way it is' manner.
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#12
(01-01-2016, 06:21 PM)Paraiyar Wrote: Before I start, I want to make it clear that this is NOT targeted at anyone in particular, just my attempt at a helpful observation.

One thing I have noticed from my time spent on this site (both as a member and before I registered) is that some people sometimes have a tendency towards overreacting to the smallest perceived slight at the hands of someone else. Often times, it can be even just be an attempt at constructive criticism that causes someone to go on the defensive and get far more agitated than what is merited. I won't go into specific examples but I've seen how this can really result in members making a thread much worse for themselves but more importantly it gives me the suspicion that this is how they might react in real life circumstances and I can't help but wonder if it might constitute a big part of the individual's problem with loneliness in general. I've had friends in real life who did this (and I've been guilty of it in the past myself) and it makes it harder to be friends with them and also results in life being more stressful and negative than it needs to be.

I think it is safe to say that in the case of ALL members, it's often the conditioning from long term loneliness and/or toxic past experiences with other people in real life that can result in this heightened sensitivity and/or defensiveness which is completely understandable but still (in my opinion) a serious thorn in the path to making life easier for oneself and for developing a good social circle

I think the solution to this is perhaps to focus on cultivating inner calmness, especially in regards to how we react to others. I know for sure that preventing myself from giving into emotional overreactions will be a big goal of mine in 2016.
Thought I would ressurect this thread I stumbled upon. I agree.  You seem to get it. I made many threads in regard to my issues with this.
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#13
I agree. Good observation...

I think there sometimes can be defensiveness due to some shame issues, frustrations, and obviously anger issues.
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#14
Oh, I wasnt clear. I mean I have issues related to what he was talking about
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#15
In some ways, I agree, restless soul. We try our best to control our emotions but we find our ourselves suppressing our true feelings. It's tough when it comes to deciding whether to be be considerate of other's feelings or just say the CORRECT thing to pacify others.
This is actually my first post on this website and my first time ever posting on a blog. I just become a member last night. I found this website this week and so far the information on this site is very helpful. It reassures me that I am not the only one battling loneliness and that there are others looking for help and support (as I am).
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#16
(12-10-2016, 01:06 AM)morgandollar Wrote: In some ways, I agree, restless soul. We try our best to control our emotions but we find our ourselves suppressing our true feelings. It's tough when it comes to deciding whether to be be considerate of other's feelings or just say the CORRECT thing to pacify others.
This is actually my first post on this website and my first time ever posting on a blog. I just become a member last night. I found this website this week and so far the information on this site is very helpful. It reassures me that I am not the only one battling loneliness and that there are others looking for help and support (as I am).

Welcome. Maybe some of my threads will be helpful that I made
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#17
Thank you, restless soul.
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#18
You say you have friends? Many of us on this site have no one... And we struggle with a lot of things such as over reacting to things others with a more fulfilled life might not. I actuactually wrote a post about it
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