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Constantly being told I look tired or unwell
#1
Does anyone have this problem as well?

I'm constantly being told how tired or unwell I look. Even on days that I am well-rested, feel great and confident, have makeup on, dressed up...I get these comments on how my face looks so tired and unwell.

I feel like that's the best I can do, yet I keep getting these comments especially from colleagues. I seem to get it more when I'm actually feeling great and am dressed up. Do you think people are just doing this to encourage me to not wear makeup or dress up?

Why do people do this?

If my colleagues tell me that I'm so worn-out looking; I would love to go home and take a nap or even take weeks off work if possible because of their "concern for my tiredness" but my colleagues would not like that.

I will look in the mirror and think I look great or as best as I can; then I start wondering if I am really sick or look sick or why people keep saying this to me.
I can't see what they seem to see. The people that I'm close to don't make these comments.

What could this mean? Isn't this annoying? I find this to be so uncalled for and annoying to be reminded every few days!!!
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#2
I went for day surgery and came out of anesthesia first thing I seen was a nurse with eye liner plastered on like Mimi from the Drew Carey show ... not sure wth she thought but I guess she thought she looked good

I was in a chain restaurant and the lady working there looked like someone had smacked her in the face with a pound of baby powder ...again I assume

Not saying that your like either of the above but maybe it is if your questioning it
I know my local drug store has a cosmetic counter with a specialist that will perrty you up her style ...think its for free ....maybe look into something like that ...chances are you will get a honest opinion from them or maybe a new look
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#3
(10-27-2016, 07:15 AM)BadGuy Wrote: I went for day surgery and came out of anesthesia first thing I seen was a nurse with eye liner plastered on like Mimi from the Drew Carey show ... not sure wth she thought but I she thought she looked good

I was in a chain restaurant and the lady working there looked like someone had smacked her in the face with a pound of baby powder ...again I assume

Not saying that your like either of the above but maybe it is if your questioning it
I know my local drug store has a cosmetic counter with a specialist that will perrty you up her style ...think its for free ....maybe look into something like that ...chances are you will get a honest opinion from them or maybe a new look

This is not a laughing matter and I feel very rude, but I had to laugh at this... 
What about when they put too much blush and it looks like they rubbed a brick on their cheeks? haha


Now, trying to be helpful... if your close friends don't say anything about it, it could be because they feel it could hurt your feelings (?), I would say you should ask them, their opinion would be more sincere that way. 
Also, if you do feel beautiful and well, why not say "fuck it" to others? The important thing is that you look yourself in the mirror and you like what you see!
[Image: tumblr_nijo7fZHBz1qg20oho1_500.gif]
"Being young and dipped in folly, I fell in love with melancholy"
-Edgar A. Poe
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#4
That feels so rude. I would have stared at them as if I did not quite get what they said and said something back along the lines of "Today I actually feel well!"

And then I would have been thinking about what they saw I did not for a day or two. So, maybe it's nothing. If it helps, I am almost certain you'd look healthy to me!
On the other hand, most people look the same to me :S

Maybe if they are generally mean, they might just be trying to undermine your self-confidence? Or maybe they're sad, and try to feel less terrible by pushing others down (something I have never and will never ever see the point in).
I am not good at these things, I want a simple book where I can read about this kinda shet.
Are you sure we're on the right way, Yoda?
Off course, we are.

The snow angel was imperfect but so is everyone. It was there, and that is what matters. Maybe someone would see it, and smile.
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#5
If I don't wear makeup, people will ask me if i am "sick" or not feeling well, blah, blah. I mean, i don't wear a lot of makeup, just some light foundation, mascara and light eyeliner on my upper lids and a bit of eyeshadow. However, when i have NO makeup on, i am very pale.
I also have some issues with my eyes. I have dry eyes as well and my eyes can get very irritated. I mean, don't you love when someone comes up and tells you that you look like Heck! Gee, thanks so much.

I think some of it is just from truly oblivious people who just honestly blurt out whatever they are thinking. Then, there are passive aggressive types trying to just be rude. However, my response would be "I feel fine. My face is my face. Soooo, not sure how to answer you".
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#6
Badguy...thanks. I've always kinda walked past those makeup clinics...I notice that they wear much more makeup than I'd like. But I think I should try it out and see what's so wrong with my face...

DarkSelene...yes, it's important to feel good about myself but it's very hard when people keep randomly coming up to me and telling me how tired (aka haggard/ worn-out) I look. I had lots of those comments just last week...I expect them to come again this week. My hubby is very tired and I asked him about that comment. Men don't seem to make those type of comments to each other. I wonder if this is a catty female thing?

Meaw...I thought about the undermining my confidence thing. I am not confident in my looks (it's something that I just try not to think about). I'm not very attractive by conventional standards and have certainly been ignored/ passed over by many people. It's gotten better but I wish people would jut leave me alone about my looks. I don't need to be told I'm pretty just as I don't need to be told I'm ugly. Just wish they'd stop...

DD...isn't that so annoying? Sometimes I feel hopeless about my face and think I need plastic surgery or something lol...I'm in my 20s so I really shouldn't be looking so worn-out...
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#7
Just wondering what your colleagues are like? Who are making the comments? Are they females or males?

It could be some female coworkers are trying to make you feel bad, it's not unlikely, especially if it's a workplace with many women? I don't know your workplace, but I did experience some really bad cases of bullying at workplaces with mostly women. I think it was often jealousy or just plain old maliciousness.
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#8
IceCastles, I bet there is nothing wrong with the way you look. If you are not confident about your looks, only you can resolve this issue. You probably haven't yet put some time into finding out what is really nice about your face, body, etc.  Makeup can sometimes emphasize the attractive facial features. if done skillfully and a professional can definitely help with that, but the issue is that those who wear all this makeup generally don't like seeing themselves in the mirror in the am and pm, meaning before the apply and after they remove their makeup. Why not accept your face the way it is first, and then watch how you don't care any more about what your colleagues are saying without their opinions being asked in the first place. I have to admit that I can be pretty mouthy in the workplace, and people generally tend to leave me alone as they learn very quickly that I don't take any BS but mind you, I have worked on this deliberately and it works great for me. Setting limits is very important. There was a female individual where I worked and she would give her opinions loudly about anything she pleased, never mind the second she opened her mouth it always became clear that she had no knowledge on anything she discussed. And needless to say, her opinions were always geared towards other females. So I was working on my laptop in the office before I went to see my patients one day, along with several other nurses. That woman comes by and yells at me out of nowhere: "Oh my gosh, this is the first time I see you with your hair down, I almost didn't recognize you. You look so much better with your hair up!" The others kind of chuckled and I looked her straight in her eyes, smiled and said with my firmest possible voice: "I really don't remember ever asking your opinion about the way I look, but I truly appreciate you being my style consultant! Thank you very much!" After that I simply enjoyed the dead silence that resulted. I did this only because I had seen her being very obnoxious with other people and it was beyond me why people tolerated her. And of course, no more comments about my hair were ever made again in my presence. She eventually got fired because she said something equally or even more profound to a patient and the patient called the office and complained. Main point is, most people treat you the way you let them treat you. Set your limits.
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#9
^she's unregistered so I doubt she will see that.
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#10
(01-05-2017, 05:17 AM)Paraiyar Wrote: ^she's unregistered so I doubt she will see that.

Well....
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