is change possible? or just another pitfall?

i mean, there is not a day that goes by where i'm not thinking about how lonely i am.....a good portion of my day is spent thinking about what i'm doing wrong with my life and i drive myself crazy making little mental notes about this that and the other, but i do what i do because i'm hoping someday i will change, or at least my life will for the better....sadly, at the end of the day, it gets me nowhere.....i have felt this way for the past six months and have never felt so shitty in my entire life truthfully, i am better than i was 2 months ago, but it just sucks when you try put your best foot forward and you meet the same impenetrable barrier of cowardice, self loathing, and overall emptiness....i just don't know how to approach people anymore and i never used to be like that, its like i've lost something...why is life such a constant brainfuck?!?!?....(sigh) ..... i wish there was an easy way out that didn't have any negative consequences.....haha now that is an illusion! and i'm rambling.....

You made a good start by opening up to us because constantly keeping it to yourself makes it more painful and here you'll find some people who can understand. It's important though that you also find local friends there. I'm pretty sure that you can make a quality friend there.

Hi Mr.

Can you please share some more? You remind me of me. (Violent Femmes song there!)

What's up? What's going on? Do you constantly self-criticize? Question your choices and how you socially interact? I do, too.