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Social media makes things awkward
#1
I will meet a knew person and we have a good conversation and things are really comfortable and go really well. Then they look me up on social media and it's like it opens them up to a bunch more about me that I didn't yet. 

I will admit.. I posted some pretty ignorant things back in the day, but even just day to day. The things I "liked" and the memes I share..

It seems like this awkward thing can happen where they know all of your family, who you hang out with, random bits of how you feel and what you think. It gives them SUCH insight as to who you are as a person. They learned everything there is to know by sniffing around facebook for 5 minutes.
With all the selfies we take, a person could recognize the unique features of your face without ever actually looking at you (in person) and to me that is so weird!

What makes it awkward is they didn't grow and have that experience with me.. they looked it up on a website. 

Anyone else get what I'm saying? I've been trying to be less active on facebook for this purpose. I'll post pictures of a special event or good memory, but keep my thoughts off it. Keep my opinions to the people in person. Keep my selfies to a low (I am a selfie queen in hiding).

NEW PERSON***

(I will often make spelling and grammar mistakes. This is consistent. I do have a bachelors degree! So much good that did me ;D )
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#2
I don't own a cell phone and don't go on facebook. I have a few pictures of myself on there, but not many.

If someone wants to meet me, they need to walk up to me and talk. That's how they know me. I could take one picture of myself every 5 minutes for 20 years, that still doesn't allow people to know ME.
Facebooks makes one known by what he writes.
That's very different from who that person IS. That's something you only knew through proximity. No one can learn by a picture if they flutter when complimented, if they bat an eyelash when lying, if they comb their hair nervously when answering a difficult question.
Facebook is surface. It's superficiality. In the end, it can easily be a lie.
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#3
I agree! I often contemplate deleting facebook, but realize it's how I keep contact with the people who I did have genuine, in person, interactions with who no longer live around me.

It's a great tool to keep up with people, but not so much when you first meet them.

I dont know if its just me that feels awkward when I know entirely too much about a person I just met.. it's a feeling as if I read their diary. I just wish people would stop adding me on facebook before a good connection was created.
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#4
I say "I don't have facebook". Might as well have said "I'm an alien from the third moon of Aldebaraan" with the look on their faces lol.
I do have facebook, but since I seldom go, why mention it?
When they ask me how we'll be able to keep contact, I point to their hands and say "Isn't that a phone? Ever tried TALKING?" ;-)
I shy away from all that. If it does bother you, maybe you should as well. It's not needed to have a full, healthy life.
Might want to empty your facebook, too. Not being a selfie queen, not putting a lot of info, etc. That way, people will have to talk to you ;-)
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#5
I think Facebook is a very negative place for most people. I have it for the only reason to keep in touch with old friends from England and all it does for me is cause plenty of social anxiety. So I tend to stay away from it.

However it is also a really good place to post sarcastic things which my wall is mostly! I like to shock those who are opinionist!

Plus with typing too fast my grammar is also often terrible! And I have two bachelor degrees Smile So I think its a normal thing whether you are educated or not.....
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#6
(02-03-2018, 02:57 AM)ManitobaBrit70 Wrote: I think Facebook is a very negative place for most people. I have it for the only reason to keep in touch with old friends from England and all it does for me is cause plenty of social anxiety. So I tend to stay away from it.

However it is also a really good place to post sarcastic things which my wall is mostly! I like to shock those who are opinionist!

Plus with typing too fast my grammar is also often terrible! And I have two bachelor degrees Smile So I think its a normal thing whether you are educated or not.....

Hehe.

I don't like Donald Trump.
So often on my facebook I'll post stuff like The Donald is the greatest man who ever lived, bar none!

Then I argue that Liberals are all idiots and that machine guns should be mandatory for all citizens over 16. Makes for funny debates ;-)


How did Bugs Bunny put it? Oh yeah...


"AIN'T I A STINKER?" ;-)
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#7
(02-03-2018, 03:10 AM)Richard_39 Wrote:
(02-03-2018, 02:57 AM)ManitobaBrit70 Wrote: I think Facebook is a very negative place for most people. I have it for the only reason to keep in touch with old friends from England and all it does for me is cause plenty of social anxiety. So I tend to stay away from it.

However it is also a really good place to post sarcastic things which my wall is mostly! I like to shock those who are opinionist!

Plus with typing too fast my grammar is also often terrible! And I have two bachelor degrees Smile So I think its a normal thing whether you are educated or not.....

Hehe.

I don't like Donald Trump.
So often on my facebook I'll post stuff like The Donald is the greatest man who ever lived, bar none!

Then I argue that Liberals are all idiots and that machine guns should be mandatory for all citizens over 16. Makes for funny debates ;-)


How did Bugs Bunny put it? Oh yeah...


"AIN'T I A STINKER?" ;-)

And this is exactly what I do Wink
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#8
OverTheRainbow Wrote:It seems like this awkward thing can happen where they know all of your family, who you hang out with, random bits of how you feel and what you think. It gives them SUCH insight as to who you are as a person. They learned everything there is to know by sniffing around facebook for 5 minutes.
With all the selfies we take, a person could recognize the unique features of your face without ever actually looking at you (in person) and to me that is so weird!

I don't properly understand what the problem is. Because from the sounds of it it's not the first time this has happened to you, and rather than do something about it you've made a post about it. Just to be clear this isn't a "nasty" reply, but you can remove ANYTHING you've ever posted on FB, or make your profile private so not just anyone can browse through; in fact FB is very customisable when it comes to privacy. It seems like you're embarrassed about things on there yet not enough to actually do anything about.

OverTheRainbow Wrote:I will admit.. I posted some pretty ignorant things back in the day, but even just day to day. The things I "liked" and the memes I share..

If you sometimes share/like things you class as "ignorant" why do you share it in the first place knowing this?

Although I do have FB myself it is pretty much just used to connect with people I don't see often and share my pictures. It is very locked down because I don't like to get into all the bullshit that most people see. I often get "friend" requests from people I simply don't know or just barely know. I've never understood selfies or posting every single event that's happening in your life. It's all too much like a social contest and people get sucked into it.

A lot of people project someone they want to be rather than someone they are. For this reason there's a lot of misinformation. I don't know if that's your case but whatever it is people are being "put off" by they're not asking you about it or seeing how things go... actually they seem pretty shallow so maybe it's a blessing in disguise.
[Image: 2vj1q3q.jpg]
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#9
(02-03-2018, 07:34 AM)9006 Wrote:
OverTheRainbow Wrote:It seems like this awkward thing can happen where they know all of your family, who you hang out with, random bits of how you feel and what you think. It gives them SUCH insight as to who you are as a person. They learned everything there is to know by sniffing around facebook for 5 minutes.
With all the selfies we take, a person could recognize the unique features of your face without ever actually looking at you (in person) and to me that is so weird!

I don't properly understand what the problem is. Because from the sounds of it it's not the first time this has happened to you, and rather than do something about it you've made a post about it. Just to be clear this isn't a "nasty" reply, but you can remove ANYTHING you've ever posted on FB, or make your profile private so not just anyone can browse through; in fact FB is very customisable when it comes to privacy. It seems like you're embarrassed about things on there yet not enough to actually do anything about.

OverTheRainbow Wrote:I will admit.. I posted some pretty ignorant things back in the day, but even just day to day. The things I "liked" and the memes I share..

If you sometimes share/like things you class as "ignorant" why do you share it in the first place knowing this?

Although I do have FB myself it is pretty much just used to connect with people I don't see often and share my pictures. It is very locked down because I don't like to get into all the bullshit that most people see. I often get "friend" requests from people I simply don't know or just barely know. I've never understood selfies or posting every single event that's happening in your life. It's all too much like a social contest and people get sucked into it.

A lot of people project someone they want to be rather than someone they are. For this reason there's a lot of misinformation. I don't know if that's your case but whatever it is people are being "put off" by they're not asking you about it or seeing how things go... actually they seem pretty shallow so maybe it's a blessing in disguise.


It's not really a problem... sorta just something I wanted to talk about and get others opinion on the matter. And, yes, you can remove things, which I have already done. When I said I posted ignorant things... I meant in the past. I would get timehops showing me things I said. They weren't necessarily ignorant, but just sorta stupid and pointless. 

I have also locked my profile down.

I was just recognizing the oversharing on facebook and how it effects future relationships... in my perspective. I don't think observing what a person posts, what they like and do and who they spend time with makes someone shallow. Taking it at face value may be off, but I think it's investigating and getting a feel for a person. I do it, too. 


Selfies really are just the worst of ideas. They are normally covered by a filter which is pretty much photo shop and makes someone look different than how they do. But I have noticed I will get more likes and comments on a selfie than I will get on pictures of what i'm doing, the people around me, a pretty nature shot. It's so weird! Sure.. like a picture of just me smiling once again behind a filter compared to this awesome picture I took over Pointe Peak mountain! Wtf is that?!
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#10
I understand how you feel. I just remove old posts that show up in my daily "On This Day" section of FB. I have things on there from like 2006? I'm a very different person since then and do not necessarily agree with the things I said back then. I'd just do a clean up as much as I can. It does take the mystery out of getting to know someone, it's why I choose (now) to post general things (funny, innocent stuff) or share my latest favourite jams or anything generic. Some updated photos for family and friends who I want them to see recent photos of myself & family. I've gotten to a point where I feel comfortable if someone new were to add me, there is still an untold story for them to uncover... if they dare Smile.

Hope that gave you some insight!
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