At least you're not this guy...

[JustLost]

source


BELLEVUE, OH (NBC) -- A man in central Ohio is accused of having sex with his picnic table.

The investigation began when a tipster gave police three DVDs showing Arthur Price having sexual intercourse with a metal round table on his deck.

The incidents occurred between January and March 2008.

Police say the DVDs show Price involved in a sex act in his bedroom. He walks out to his deck, tilts the table on its side and has sex with it.

Police say Price lives near an elementary school.

Price admitted that he had sex with the picnic table when police questioned him.

He confirmed to police the incidents caught on the DVDs and said he had also had sex with the table inside the home.

Price faces four counts of public indecency. He is free on a $20,000 bond.

NBC
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I don't know, maybe he's got the right idea. A picnic table doesn't care how much money you make. It doesn't care if you work too many hours and come home late. It doesn't get upset if you forget your anniversary or leave the toilet seat up.

Sure the conversation would be a bit one sided, but you have to be willing to make a few compromises in ANY relationship.

 

[Bluey]

LMFAO With a picnic table.... hahahah lol Tell me how would that work lol... Really I would like a diagram drawing and everything hahah

Oh God why don't he by hes own table if that what did it for him instead of doing it in public. Are maybe he had a thing for that table lool

edit: I think my desk just winked at me lol

 

[Bluey]

nerr its not doing nothing for me... Tis making me feel like a beer tho LMAO

 

[Skorian]

Very odd...

Is this really true?

 

[Incognita]

i think hes just masturbating..its like women...kids cover ur ears...women with washing machines lmao

 

[Skorian]

i think hes just masturbating..its like women...kids cover ur ears...women with washing machines lmao

Probably. Otherwise, metal and splinters..... SCARY!

At this place I used to work my boss used to get a magazine. I think it was "Stuff" magazine. http://www.stuffmagazine.com/index.aspx

Anyways one issue was about *clears throat*. Masturbation accidents guys had. Many were like on the job. Some factory worker dude tried to get off by putting his junk up against a conveyer belt and when the staple part (where the ends are joined at meet) came around it tore him all up..... OUCH! So I guess this guy thought that trying to staple things with a stapler or something to make things right again was a good idea. Some people are so dumb.





Do washing machines really get the job done?

 

[20years2many]

Wow that's pretty disturbing...I'm all for freedom, but near a school? And what about splinters? OWW. I don't know if washing machines get the job done, but this girl I know admitted she can get off at theme parks and on motorcycles.

 

[Incognita]

i think hes just masturbating..its like women...kids cover ur ears...women with washing machines lmao

Probably. Otherwise, metal and splinters..... SCARY!

At this place I used to work my boss used to get a magazine. I think it was "Stuff" magazine. http://www.stuffmagazine.com/index.aspx

Anyways one issue was about *clears throat*. Masturbation accidents guys had. Many were like on the job. Some factory worker dude tried to get off by putting his junk up against a conveyer belt and when the staple part (where the ends are joined at meet) came around it tore him all up..... OUCH! So I guess this guy thought that trying to staple things with a stapler or something to make things right again was a good idea. Some people are so dumb.

poor guy...

 

[JustLost]

nerr its not doing nothing for me... Tis making me feel like a beer tho LMAO

Not really doing anything for me either, but then I'm more of a credenza man...


Yeah baby!

or maybe a nice ottoman, I haven't decided.

 

[JustLost]

Anyways one issue was about *clears throat*. Masturbation accidents guys had. Many were like on the job. Some factory worker dude tried to get off by putting his junk up against a conveyer belt and when the staple part (where the ends are joined at meet) came around it tore him all up..... OUCH! So I guess this guy thought that trying to staple things with a stapler or something to make things right again was a good idea. Some people are so dumb

That's just...just...wrong!

Everyone knows when the staple part comes back around you have to lift up for a second...don't these factory workers know ANYTHING?

 

[Bluey]

lol You are all bad bad ppl

 

[Tramp]

nerr its not doing nothing for me... Tis making me feel like a beer tho LMAO

Why? That's a perfectly sexy picnic table.

 

[Irishdoll]

OMG, that is just so wrong, but at the same time so darn funny. It's like lookin at something that makes you ill, but for the life of you, you can't turn away lmao.

 

[JustLost]

OMG, that is just so wrong, but at the same time so darn funny. It's like lookin at something that makes you ill, but for the life of you, you can't turn away lmao.

Just when I think I've seen everything...someone does their picnic table. Truth really is stranger than fiction.

 

[Dizzy]

I think Jay Leno (or some other late night host) mentioned this a while back. He said something along the lines of "how bad must the women in this town look?" lol.

 

[Tramp]

Not sure if you guys have seen this before: http://72.14.205.104/search?q=cache...42.html+man+sex+with+camel&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1

But he was in LOVE...

 

[Outlawstarl337]

did you know you'll get more prison time for raping a dog then a person?

I dont know this from experice!!!

 

[Bluey]

did you know you'll get more prison time for raping a dog then a person?

I dont know this from experice!!!

See this is the kinder Topsy tuerby world we live in.

Did you also know that dog food has moor regulations then ppl food.

So one can conclude here that we do indeed love our pets moor then we do other ppl. (and I can see why)

 

[NeverMore]

What was even funnier was how openly he admitted: Yea I had sex with my picnic table and my table inside, you gotta problem with it!?!

You'd think he'd at least deny it once or something,lol

 

[JustLost]

Not sure if you guys have seen this before: http://72.14.205.104/search?q=cache...42.html+man+sex+with+camel&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1

But he was in LOVE...

LOL...

It just goes to show that when you live in a country where your women are covered from head to toe, the camel starts to look pretty good.